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And I fully agree with you that no one should be shamed of things that are not under their control.
But the fact is, he will be shamed. He will be, if he wets the bed every night at scout camp. Or if it's discovered that he wears pullups at night.
I wouldn't call the scout master, and I wouldn't call the head of the summer camp to alert them that your 10 year old will be attending and will have to deal with a soaked sleeping bag or privacy in putting on pull ups. Because that will be noted in his scout records - and any mom in the troop who is processing the papers for camp will see it. So and so has a strawberry allergy. This kid takes ritalin. This one wets the bed nightly and will be wearing pullups.
You're on the verge of making a life changing mistake sending him to camp where he'll likely wet the bed every night. Please don't do that to him.
Although I agree with you, this is no more shameful than a child who can't control sneezing around oak pollen. It's not fair.
Sorry to say, but I totally agree that he will be shamed. I also feel that it isn't fair to expect the scout master to deal with a wet sleeping bag every night. It's not that easy at camp.
Sorry to say, but I totally agree that he will be shamed. I also feel that it isn't fair to expect the scout master to deal with a wet sleeping bag every night. It's not that easy at camp.
I don't see why this is even given as an option. When you know it's coming, you contain it. I would never just let my kid pee all over his bedding if it was a predictable occurrence.
I wet the bed when I was younger and only did two sleep overs at someone's house and it was a nightmare as I peed my sleeping bag both times. "Did you wet the bed?!" are the words I still remember to this day (I'm 45 now). I think it was a major contributor to me not having friends due to this fear, although I do not believe he told anyone else other than his parents.
My mom took me to a clinic at 7-9 years old. I still remember how afraid I was (I was afraid of everything when I was younger, and still have fear of many things today). Anyway, one recommendation that I think might help is ask them to hold their urine to increasing amounts of time when they think they have to pee during the day. They recommend a monetary award of increasing cash based on the time held. I think this may help them build up those muscles down there so that, hopefully, during the evening their minds will subconsciously hold it, or, wake them up to pee.
As an adult I wake up 1-3 times each night to pee and thankfully not wet the bed
The mom isn't going to let him go and just pee willy nilly. She is looking for options. I have sent my son with accidents several times to over night camp with plans in place to make it so the other kids did not find out if he had an accident. And no one did.
But on top of that...if your kid is teasing or shaming a child for having an accident, or at age 8 or 10 doesn't know how to handle potentially embarrassing or private matters discretely, then you are not doing your job as a parent and your child is likely a bully. You have to teach your children NOT to be bullies...to understand all other people have unique struggles and to respect their friends. It doesn't *have* to be like that.
My sons best friend wet the bed until high school. He was known as the "bedwetter" by everyone else in school. Wasn't fun for him. If you choose to put your son through that that's your call but I would never.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Harpaint
Sorry to say, but I totally agree that he will be shamed. I also feel that it isn't fair to expect the scout master to deal with a wet sleeping bag every night. It's not that easy at camp.
Exactly. I would never share this info with anyone...how would the son feel if the Scout master knew????
He will not be able to hide it. The odor of urine in a tent?
The mom isn't going to let him go and just pee willy nilly. She is looking for options. I have sent my son with accidents several times to over night camp with plans in place to make it so the other kids did not find out if he had an accident. And no one did.
But on top of that...if your kid is teasing or shaming a child for having an accident, or at age 8 or 10 doesn't know how to handle potentially embarrassing or private matters discretely, then you are not doing your job as a parent and your child is likely a bully. You have to teach your children NOT to be bullies...to understand all other people have unique struggles and to respect their friends. It doesn't *have* to be like that.
Who said that? No one.
Absolutely no one said they allow their own child to "bully" another kid. I would destroy my child if they did that and I myself, went into ninja mode to save my son's friend's dignity and feelings when he wet the bed at my home but let's get real...some boys are rough.
You think they're going to hug it out with the kid that wet the bed & sing Kumbaya???
It may be medically normal for 1 in 6 to have this problem at age 10, but they must be dealing with it privately because it isn't a generally known fact. I don't think the OP is being encouraged to keep him home this time because we've all raised boys to be bullies. But the fact remains that the OP's son is already sensitive about the issue, and it only takes one kid finding out to cause embarrassment even if nothing is said. I hope some medication can help before camp, or that he can at least use pull ups privately. My boys were in the 90% height too, and were always expected to act older than their age, so I can imagine this only makes it even harder on this boy.
Absolutely no one said they allow their own child to "bully" another kid. I would destroy my child if they did that and I myself, went into ninja mode to save my son's friend's dignity and feelings when he wet the bed at my home but let's get real...some boys are rough.
You think they're going to hug it out with the kid that wet the bed & sing Kumbaya???
Reread the thread.
And they don't have to be singing Kumbaya...we just need to teach our kids basics in humanity, respect and empathy. Kids don't HAVE to tease other kids who face a struggle.
And they don't have to be singing Kumbaya...we just need to teach our kids basics in humanity, respect and empathy. Kids don't HAVE to tease other kids who face a struggle.
The sad thing is, many parents don't. And kids DO tease. And parents, even Scout Leaders, can't be depended on to handle this in a sensitive manner. I even saw a teacher acquaintance making an "ugly face" while talking about a 7 year old girl leaving a pull up in her bathroom trash after her daughter had a sleep over. I distinctly remember how she rolled her eyes and said "it really stank". As I reread the thread it seemed to me that all the posts were sincerely meant to help this boy and protect him from humiliation while away at camp.
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