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I notice my 8 year old nephew still sucks his fingers and is always sitting on someone's lap, usually his grandmother's. He's kind of an odd kid, never gets excited about much, kind of bratty. At my 1 yr old's bday party she got a little rocking horse and he kept riding on it. His parents said nothing, he looked huge and foolish on it and it was really starting to annoy me particularly because my daughter wanted to use it.
The lap thing seems babyish to me too mainly because he does it at parties and it seems like he should be more independent in a setting like this. Might be something he does when he gets tired....but again 8 seems for this.
Kids are weird. Some 8 year olds are still snuggly. It's not really a problem. I sucked my thumb until I was 8, then had to have orthodontic work to fix the damage I did to my teeth. That's really up to his parents to worry about, though. Is this your sibling's child or your husband's sibling? If it's your sister or brother, you could mention the teeth thing. Otherwise I'd just leave it alone. I might ask my brother about something like that, but not my husband's siblings.
I would, please, try to refrain from calling him all those names you just called him. His behaviors you explained is caused by sensory issues...which could be rooted in anything from autism spectrum disorder to trauma and 101 reasons in between. He has enough people in his life that think of him as weird and odd, he does not need his family jumping on that bandwagon. Embrace him for who he is. I would be willing to bet a lot of money that he is a pretty cool kid if you got to really know him.
The rocking horse likely was giving him much needed vestibular sensory input. Being held might also offer that (or safety if he is feeling like he is getting too much sensory input). Sucking on his fingers is likely linked to oral sensory seeking, or arrested development due to trauma (but still addressed the same way). Think about gifting him things that will help meet his oral and vestibular seeking needs. Here is a list The Ultimate List of Gifts for Sensory Seekers -
I notice my 8 year old nephew still sucks his fingers and is always sitting on someone's lap, usually his grandmother's. He's kind of an odd kid, never gets excited about much, kind of bratty. At my 1 yr old's bday party she got a little rocking horse and he kept riding on it. His parents said nothing, he looked huge and foolish on it and it was really starting to annoy me particularly because my daughter wanted to use it.
The lap thing seems babyish to me too mainly because he does it at parties and it seems like he should be more independent in a setting like this. Might be something he does when he gets tired....but again 8 seems for this.
All totally judgmental statements about this boy, in case you were wondering what I meant. Time to adjust your expectations of him and look for things you do like about him...
P.S. How would you feel if your sibling talked about your daughter in these terms?
One more thing, I often held all my kids on my lap (sensory, trauma and neuro-typical) at age 8. I still hold my 10 year old on my lap at times. There is nothing odd about an 8 year old sitting in a lap.
I notice my 8 year old nephew still sucks his fingers and is always sitting on someone's lap, usually his grandmother's. He's kind of an odd kid, never gets excited about much, kind of bratty. At my 1 yr old's bday party she got a little rocking horse and he kept riding on it. His parents said nothing, he looked huge and foolish on it and it was really starting to annoy me particularly because my daughter wanted to use it.
Sounds like he has a disability of some kind if his parents have not stopped him from displaying these behaviors by the age of 8.
Apparently he does well in school...so it seems like that trumps everything. He also plays sports. If there's anything wrong no one has said anything to us. I don't think it's an autism thing.
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Never mind, I don't want an answer...I just wanted to point out its an foolish comment