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Old 06-16-2017, 02:54 PM
 
62 posts, read 26,766 times
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Dear Nicholas move to a different place.
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Old 06-16-2017, 09:01 PM
 
Location: North Carolina
415 posts, read 216,313 times
Reputation: 644
Quote:
Originally Posted by KittenSparkles View Post
Maybe this has been addressed but if you have an email account and can read forums such as this, is there something preventing you from getting a Facebook account?
My mom has been completely against Facebook since its inception. I did make an account in secret, but I've been hesitant to log on much or friend many people because I don't want her to find out, at least not until I am able to move out.
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Old 06-16-2017, 09:08 PM
 
7,073 posts, read 4,015,067 times
Reputation: 8463
Nicholas,
What about taking some of your classes on campus in the Fall? Is that not a possibility at all?
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Old 06-16-2017, 09:36 PM
 
5,374 posts, read 2,430,252 times
Reputation: 13759
Let go with love- This works both ways.

I commend you for being able to communicate here on this forum. Give yourself credit

You've got the right mind set, its how to apply it thru independent actions. Can you perhaps have a non bias relative sit in on a family chat? ANd discuss your plans?

You are biting at the bits without truly understanding the world and its pit falls. Your Parents have walked that path, so their perception may be what is holding them back from guiding you to a more adult like being.
I'm sure there is room for each to grow...

It takes some active listening sometimes for each person to consider plans of actions.
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Old 06-16-2017, 10:04 PM
 
12,819 posts, read 14,948,366 times
Reputation: 14607
Don't ask their permission, just start doing what you need to do to become independent. Get a part time job, get a phone and start putting money away fast so you have enough to move out when you are ready. You will still be stuck living with your parents until you are able to move out, but just the fact that you are making plans and setting goals and saving money so you can move out should make it more bearable. Don't be disrespectful to them, but don't be manipulated either. Just get a part time job and tell them you decided it's time to be more independent. Tell them you know they won't be around forever and it's time for you to start learning to take care of yourself. It would terrify me knowing my kids were totally dependent on me and that if I were to die they couldn't manage on their own. Your parents should want you to learn to be independent.
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Old 06-17-2017, 01:27 AM
 
Location: NYC
2,623 posts, read 1,420,190 times
Reputation: 7108
Move.

Move forward with your life, whether its school or a job, & then move out. Don't ask permission, just tell them of your decision once you've figured it out. No rancor or anger, it's just the natural way of our world & you know you need to use your wings soon. It's a big change for everyone.
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Old 06-17-2017, 08:09 AM
 
564 posts, read 275,966 times
Reputation: 1155
As long as you're under their roof, you must abide by their rules. If those "rules" are damaging to your personal growth, as seems the case, it's your duty to yourself to move out. Yesterday. Perhaps you can find an uninhabited bridge under which to spend your nights. Anything, any place. Else. GET OUT! Momma ain't a gonna change.

A helpful suggestion: Join the Air Force. Maybe the Navy. Doubt if you're up to the Army. No need to discuss the Marine Corps.
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Old 06-17-2017, 08:33 AM
 
6,192 posts, read 3,318,780 times
Reputation: 16423
Quote:
Originally Posted by cekkk View Post
As long as you're under their roof, you must abide by their rules. If those "rules" are damaging to your personal growth, as seems the case, it's your duty to yourself to move out. Yesterday. Perhaps you can find an uninhabited bridge under which to spend your nights. Anything, any place. Else. GET OUT! Momma ain't a gonna change.

A helpful suggestion: Join the Air Force. Maybe the Navy. Doubt if you're up to the Army. No need to discuss the Marine Corps.

Normally I wouldn't make this suggestion, but it may be your best answer. Drop by the local recruiting station and sign up. Don't even tell mom until it's time to leave because she will turn on the water works and do everything to stop you. Use dad for courage to do it if you have to. In your case I'd suggest Coast Guard or Air Force because I agree with the above; your background hasn't prepared you for Army or Navy or even the Peach Corps for that matter.


When I turned 18, dad drove me to the recruiting center and said take your pick (Air Force). It was a great life. Got a college degree, ROTC, and have done some amazing things because of it. One of the hardest jobs as a parent is to raise an independent child. Like a previous poster I've seen kids raised by over protective parents and how difficult it is for them to break free. The years of psychological control are hard to break. But it has to be done for everyone's sake.
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Old 06-17-2017, 08:38 AM
 
Location: here
24,758 posts, read 29,360,674 times
Reputation: 31931
This would probably be a pretty big leap for you, but could you apply for student loans and go away to college?
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Old 06-17-2017, 08:40 AM
 
10,823 posts, read 7,888,460 times
Reputation: 19258
In a way I think your job is college. You don't have expenses. You can submerge yourself into the college experience. With all the bad stuff, your parents are just paranoid. Get your degree and get your job.

I've been taking SAMe for years and it's otc in the vitamin section. It's prescribed for depression in Europe. Very safe for anyone.
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