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I would never push a kid into doing anything that's supposed to be fun. What is the point of that? On the other hand, I do push my daughter to learn her multiplication tables.
When I was 7 or 8 I was much too shy to play team sports. The idea of being the one at bat would have been overwhelming. In middle school I asked to run track and played soccer in high school. So even if a kid doesn't want to play sports in second grade it doesn't mean he or she never will.
You are the perfect example of the fact that you don't need to feel as a parent that not exposing your child to all kinds of things/sports at an early age will prevent them from trying things or knowing what they may like later on
Sometimes non organized things are what kids need. For the last two years during the summer evenings my son and a group of his friends (we are lucky the way the neighborhoods are and the park) get together and play kick the can. Yes, that game does still exist amongst kids (and these are early teens we are talking about). I love it when they all do stuff like that.
I think encouraging them to do sports is fine, not pushing them. But, I firmly believe that you MAKE them finish out their commitment to a team. I don't let my kids quit mid season because they aren't the best on the team, have been made fun of, don't like someone, or because they plain old don't like it, etc. They are MADE to stick it out. They don't have to sign up the next year if they don't want to, but they must finish.
I coach girls gymnastics and see a lot of parents that are forcing their kids in the gym. As a coach, its really disheartening and frustrating! A child who doesnt want to be there is more likely to get injured, more of a distraction to the other kids, and more effort from me because rather than teaching them gymnastics, Im constantly trying to find something for them to enjoy about the sport and get SOMETHING, ANYTHING positive about it out of the experience. I will tell parents if their child isnt enjoying it, that maybe after season would be a good time to explore other activities. And fortunatly, i can use my own kids as examples. I have three. Only the little one is into gymnastics. People see her in there w/me all the time and accuse me of pushing her, but its all her. She just turned 6 and is the youngest on team and she would be in that gym 24/7 if i let her. I have to drag her out in tears many days because she doesnt want to quit for the day. The other two on the other hand, are total opposites. They both did gym for awhile, and each decided on their own to no longer stay with it. My son had to finish out the session, and my daughter to finish out the season. Now he does soccer and she is still searching. So I can tell these parents, as a coach, former gymnast, and a parent of a gymnast, I KNOW WHERE YOURE COMING FROM! BUT, the negative outcome can go on for years if you force them to stick with it. Finish the session/season, YES! but then help your child find what THEY want to do, NOT what the parents dreams were. Maybe Mom wants a champion gymnast, but if the desire isnt there, no amount of pushing will make it happen. I feel for the poor kids who are made to do a sport they dislike. Its a lose-lose situation.
There is a difference between forcing a child to play sports and encouraging them. I would like to think most of us understand the difference. I have encouraged my children to do sports and to try different activities, but forcing, no. I would rather have my children in activities and getting exercise than sitting home watching tv or playing video games, which by the way they would rather be doing at times. I know my daughter is hesitant to try new activities but with encouragement she does it and 9 out of 10 times, ends up enjoying it.
i hope people didn't get the wrong idea..I didn't force my kids to play sports. it was really what was available and that is pretty much what everyone did around here. we were a pretty small town at the time(3000) and that is how everyone got to meet more people. when they decided that they didn't really like baseball and were ready to quit, it was no problem!
i hope people didn't get the wrong idea..I didn't force my kids to play sports. it was really what was available and that is pretty much what everyone did around here. we were a pretty small town at the time(3000) and that is how everyone got to meet more people. when they decided that they didn't really like baseball and were ready to quit, it was no problem!
Not at all. Everything you did made perfect sense to me.
I had a discussion with a friend yesterday about the fact that her 7-year old son has no interest in playing sports. She is very concerned about this, and wants to sign him up anyway.
On the one hand, I see her point about phim maybe needing a push and then finding out her enjoys it, but on the other hand, I have seen a few kids play soccer with my son who are so unhappy to be there that it just breaks your heart.
I really don't know the right thing to do - what do you think?
Personally, I don't think I would push my kids to play a PARTICULAR sport. I would like for them to try different sports/activities and settle on one that they like. There's too many lifelong advantages to playing a sport or outdoor activity (especially one that they can play for life... like tennis, etc.). If they want to do yoga, or an individual workout then that would be fine also. I expect for them to move and not be couch potatoes... If they hate sports then they'll be cleaning my house and working in the yard instead but they have that choice to say "no" to sports but... they'll be doing something else instead. Go be active OR do the dishes. Go play tennis OR pick up dog poop. Being a slug is not a choice in my house.
the other thing that goes along with kids in sports is the people you meet. I cannot tell you the number of friends that we made over the years because our sons play sports. Our oldest played all through highschool and is now a freshman in college and we were going through sports withdrawl this fall..the first time in four years that we did not HAVE to be at a football game or a basketball game. we still went and help with the sports booster concessions and watched the other kids, but it was really strange not having your own kid out there. our youngest is just getting started in the middle school sports thing, so we do have round two to look forward to! If the sports or band or drama are things your kids love, you really grow to love it too! i would not trade one minute of the fun!!!
You know what's going to happen don't you? One of your twins is bound to be the star quarterback and you are going to have to suffer through endless football games. LOL. Just like my daughter will likely grow to love fishing as much as I loathe it and I will have to learn how to gut a fish....UGH. Nature's sense of humor at its finest!
Funny you should mention that - it's crossed my mind! I've vowed to take interest in whatever they enjoy doing, so I very well may be sitting on the sidelines at many a little league game.
its finding the right activity. zero activity is bad. it will be filled with the wrong activity. who knows, you might
have a good clarinet player on your hands and not know it.
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Nature's sense of humor at its finest!
