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Old 12-17-2017, 01:48 PM
 
Location: NY
544 posts, read 674,155 times
Reputation: 874

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I know many of you give some great advice and really am just full of anxiety, which I already have an issue with to begin with. We've rented in a 2 family home with our ll's upstairs, for almost 5 years. We have a thuggish couple, and I mean mentality, who we have had on and off issues with for the the entire time we've been here. Current state of the relationship is if husband says hi, I'll give a hi back, wife doesn't make eye contact with me (but talks about me to her playground friends and then they will stare me down) and husband is on full speaking terms with them.

Well to make an extremely long story short and yes I have to leave out tons of back details on what they have done over the years, I was verbally threatened to "shut the blank up before I slap you across the "blank" face with a shovel along with my stupid husband) when I honked and asked the husband to move his car (which he blocks the driveway in on a consistent basis or hangs over where I can't get in.) I had my child with me too and have NEVER been threatend by anyone, let alone a male "good" neighbor (yes they called themselves that before lol). I was scared and I sure as hell told my DH. Well he confronted the guy , I'm sure many of you think he shouldn't have, which ended in a psychical altercation. The wife bum rushed her husband, ran up my steps and proceeded to pound on our glass window, brake 3 brackets, and turn my door knob trying to bust in. At his point, my ll was outside, neighbors and then the cops. I was told by wife to "watch my back" which everyone heard. The husband DENIED ever saying anything to me Shocker right..

My husband and I already have a downpayment for house, made 2 offers this summer that were rejected and decided to start the school year (1st grader and pre-ker) here and pick up in the spring. I no longer feel safe here, yes, I am afraid of retaliation (DH's car was keyed both sides front to back 1 summer ago when he was parked down the block and we still don't know who did it). My DH is the most passive (probably too passive with this situation from the beginning), and non-confrontational person there is. The above incident was his breaking point unfortunately. I just went back to work this year and do per diem work, so am home a lot during the day when the wife is home. We also share a driveway. MY ll and DH think this guy may have a record or some legal issue going on already based on comments he made with the police. DH and I both come, and have lived, in nice residential areas our entire life, NEVER had issues with neighbors, until we came upon this nightmare. Just 2 weeks ago, my 85 year old grandpa almost got knocked over getting out of his car to come in my house by said neighbors greyhound that they allow to run off leash all over the neighborhood and pee and poop on our side. You can bet my grandpa told this guy to leash up his dog.

Would you even consider riding it out here with kids until the Spring and moving once my kids are done with school? We plan on moving over state lines BTW bc we are priced out of the housing market here. I have no family here for us to stay with. I even considered contacting my estranged mother, well for a split second. Only other option would be to take both kids out of school now and move to my inlaws an hour away. DH thinks we should start house hunting again, but I know that could take quite some time and 60 days or more for closing. These peoples kid also goes to my kids school.

Any advice? Does it sound unsafe for my kids?

Last edited by Me 82; 12-17-2017 at 02:11 PM..
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Old 12-17-2017, 02:15 PM
 
7,880 posts, read 4,507,905 times
Reputation: 8321
I'm sorry you have been dealing with this. I would not feel safe in that situation and would explore other options if you have some that are feasible. In the meantime I would call the police anytime anything happens including verbal threats and get a security camera like on of those doorbell security cameras.
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Old 12-17-2017, 02:25 PM
 
Location: NY
544 posts, read 674,155 times
Reputation: 874
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissTerri View Post
I'm sorry you have been dealing with this. I would not feel safe in that situation and would explore other options if you have some that are feasible. In the meantime I would call the police anytime anything happens including verbal threats and get a security camera like on of those doorbell security cameras.
I just got home before and they have opened their kitchen window (it's 32 degrees out) and have rap music with EXPLICIT lyrics blasting towards our house now for 3 hours. Its on auto play. Their speakers are in the window.
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Old 12-17-2017, 02:28 PM
 
7,880 posts, read 4,507,905 times
Reputation: 8321
It sounds like they are going to try and escalate things. Will your landlord let you out of your lease? Is staying with your in-laws while you look for another place a real option?
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Old 12-17-2017, 02:31 PM
 
1,336 posts, read 641,268 times
Reputation: 2731
Good Lord! I would get out of that situation right NOW! You are lucky you have someplace to go - your inlaws. Take the kids out of the school where they are and get yourself to someplace safe. Life is too short to put up with that kind of thing. You can househunt from your inlaw's place.
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Old 12-17-2017, 02:54 PM
 
Location: NY
544 posts, read 674,155 times
Reputation: 874
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissTerri View Post
It sounds like they are going to try and escalate things. Will your landlord let you out of your lease? Is staying with your in-laws while you look for another place a real option?
We have no lease so we can up and go at anytime. Yes, staying with in-laws is an option but that means uprooting my kids within the next few weeks to go and then switch schools. And all this right before Christmas. When my husband comes home tonight I am going to have to talk to him about what our next steps are.

I'm even thinking, and dreading, contacting my estranged mother. She has an extra bedroom,and then my kids could still stay at the school to finish the year. But I know my husband will not go there to stay. So now my family has to separate?
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Old 12-17-2017, 06:09 PM
 
1,336 posts, read 641,268 times
Reputation: 2731
You said you have a first grader and a pre-kindergartner? It would not be hard on them at all to take them out of school after the Christmas holidays. I mean, come on, it's not like they are in middle school or high school. They will make new friends immediately, both of them.

You should keep your family together, for goodness sake. It is not safe where you are, and you will never forgive yourself if something happens to one of the children, or to your husband; and where would your family be if something happened to you? I would run, not walk, out of that situation. Why on earth would you let yourself in for some possible violence when you have somewhere to go? Most people would thank their lucky stars if they had somewhere to move to immediately.

Sorry to come on so strongly, but most people will sit and let a situation get out of hand before they feel they have to act, and then it's too late because someone got out of control. These people can't be trusted to behave.
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Old 12-17-2017, 06:28 PM
 
Location: Centre of the continent
256 posts, read 76,707 times
Reputation: 1021
Quote:
Originally Posted by Me 82 View Post
Would you even consider riding it out here with kids until the Spring and moving once my kids are done with school? ...
Any advice? Does it sound unsafe for my kids?
No. Yes. Yes it does.

Your kids are very little. Moving at their age is much easier than when they are older. I'd get the heck out of there, however you have to do it. By sticking around you're feeding into the drama, and are making yourself part of the problem.
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Old 12-17-2017, 06:38 PM
 
Location: planet earth
644 posts, read 189,227 times
Reputation: 1705
Just rent any ole place for now - just go and then figure out details later.
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Old 12-17-2017, 09:14 PM
 
7,361 posts, read 6,418,893 times
Reputation: 14082
Get out.

List your alternatives, their plusses and minuses, decide which is best, then act quickly and quietly. Don't let them know ahead of time that you're moving. Consider using a storage unit for some of your stuff until you're resettled - that way, you could start moving some things now.

Your children will be much better off in a safe environment. Even if they are not personally endangered, they are picking up on the negative atmosphere and your unease. They deserve better.

After you're safely out, search your "neighbors"' names online. You may find mugshots and lists of individual arrests.
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