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Old 12-22-2017, 12:24 PM
 
2,928 posts, read 1,455,142 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rugrats2001 View Post
My personal experience is that girls with a preponderance of male friends have a hard time adjusting to a truly monogamous relationship or married life. These 'semi-platonic' friends usually feel free to give/receive back rubs, hugs, flirtatious smacks or other similar contact, foot rubs, watch movies, be a shoulder to cry on, someone to share confidences with, go out to dinner, etc., etc., that a true boyfriend/husband will not often find acceptable or amusing.

YMMV...
To respond to several female posters who had predominantly male friends because of shared interests such as sports, and who fit in as 'one of the boys' with them, the above wasn't really intended to address that particular situation. It applies much more to girls who intentionally gravitate to girl-boy 'friendships' even when there are other girls who could share their interests.
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Old 12-22-2017, 01:18 PM
 
Location: Mt. Lebanon
1,559 posts, read 1,689,444 times
Reputation: 1177
she's a Tom boy. what should you bother? let her be happy
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Old 12-22-2017, 01:21 PM
 
Location: Crook County, Illinois
2,555 posts, read 973,061 times
Reputation: 3119
Quote:
Originally Posted by rugrats2001 View Post
To respond to several female posters who had predominantly male friends because of shared interests such as sports, and who fit in as 'one of the boys' with them, the above wasn't really intended to address that particular situation. It applies much more to girls who intentionally gravitate to girl-boy 'friendships' even when there are other girls who could share their interests.
What's so bad about a girl gravitating to guys for friendships? Other than things like not being able to have sleepovers, for reasons that shall be left unsaid. Granted, some guys may accept the friendship for the wrong reasons, or she may gravitate for the wrong reasons herself. But when it's all legit, where's the bad part?
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Old 12-22-2017, 02:10 PM
 
9,786 posts, read 5,845,892 times
Reputation: 22353
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vegabern View Post
I forgot, it's illegal for 15 year olds. 1-14 16-200, you're fine. But try doing calculus at 15 and you'll be brought up on charges before you can say Leibniz . Because what happens at my school is obviously the law of the land.
LOL My husband did calculus at 15. He was just really good in math. Now a days math is often even more accelerated. I was good at math but my kids are taught skills 1-3 years before I was taught as a kid
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Old 12-22-2017, 02:12 PM
 
9,786 posts, read 5,845,892 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by zesty2 View Post
If you have been married for 20 years with no issues, there's no reason it isn't appropriate for you to hang out on your own with another guy.
Oh thanks for laying out the terms of my marriage for me. I am glad I have you so you can guide me on what is right for my marriage.


How many years have you been married?
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Old 12-22-2017, 05:34 PM
 
426 posts, read 116,828 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kapikap View Post
That's just pure BS! Imagime my wife going to a movie with a male friend? You kidding me? Nothing platonic about leaving your spouse to go hang out with the opposite sex.

Yeah, honey,I'm going out to go hunting with my lady friend. I will see you tonight after I spend all day alone with her, hunting. That won't sit too well with most couples.

Old friends, especially of the opposite sex, need to stay away. Just playing with fire, and causing insecurity and conflict into the marriage.

This nonsense of sharing feelings, or talking about each other's spouses is way gone in HS. You need someone to talk to,go see a counselor.

As for the OP, there has to be some boundaries. When she does date, or when she gets older, this kind of behaviour will raise eye brows.will cause marital problems. Will cause conflict. Can put her in a dangerous place, like drunk sex, or assault.

Men and women are not the same,don't look at sex the same. Just imagine if your daughter does get involved in a serious relationship, but one of her male friends
-starts talking crap to her new man, or -
-feels that friendship came first than her relationship, or
- her male friend knows too much about the personal relationship?

This will cause too much conflict, and she will just look like the bad person.


So you're saying once your wife married you, she had to give up all her male friends just for you?

Yeah, that's not controlling at all. Will you allow her to talk to her male relatives without security being present?

If that won't sit well with most couples, that just means most couples are controlling and don't really love each other.

Maybe they just married for financial convenience because those are not real marriages.

Please stop encouraging people to go see a counselor just for someone to talk to. Counselors are supposed to be for people with real problems.

This is why health care is in tatters in the world. People utilizing medical help because they have no friends. That's not what our taxes are supposed to pay for.
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Old 12-22-2017, 05:36 PM
 
426 posts, read 116,828 times
Reputation: 229
Quote:
Originally Posted by kapikap View Post
All this massage crap,hugs, sharing feelings, do it with the same sex.

I would never have a same sex friend give me a massage! Ruby feet,hug and cuddle,all this extra ,like a couple but not a couple.sharing feelings? Man, myale friends will laugh at me. I think if I were a female, my girlfriend's would laugh at me too.

Boys are friends with girls, cause they want to get some,or catch a feel. Only to go home and have sex in his own hand!

Some of these kids are not skilled in courting, not skilled in dating, this is practice! Life ain't black and white! The opposite sex mix it up for one thing only. Unless it's work friends,school friends,that you see and say hi for a few minutes, should not be happening.


To summarize, are you saying that males and females should be quarantined into separate cultures, except for married couples?

It sounds like you would ban ANY platonic relationship between a boy and girl.
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Old 12-22-2017, 05:37 PM
 
426 posts, read 116,828 times
Reputation: 229
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vegabern View Post
I forgot, it's illegal for 15 year olds. 1-14 16-200, you're fine. But try doing calculus at 15 and you'll be brought up on charges before you can say Leibniz . Because what happens at my school is obviously the law of the land.

I meant you're not introduced to calculus until college or maybe 12th grade.

9th graders only do calculus in Asia where school is taken seriously.

Are you from Asia? If so, I apologize.
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Old 12-22-2017, 05:38 PM
 
426 posts, read 116,828 times
Reputation: 229
Quote:
Originally Posted by annabanana123 View Post
By then most of the girl drama was gone and I had a lot more in common with other moms. Kids are a great equalizer. Now there are still some I donít hang out with because of the drama but most have outgrown that by now.

What girl drama are you referring to that left when you became a mom?
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Old 12-22-2017, 05:40 PM
 
426 posts, read 116,828 times
Reputation: 229
Quote:
Originally Posted by MillennialUrbanist View Post
What's so bad about a girl gravitating to guys for friendships? Other than things like not being able to have sleepovers, for reasons that shall be left unsaid. Granted, some guys may accept the friendship for the wrong reasons, or she may gravitate for the wrong reasons herself. But when it's all legit, where's the bad part?

Why can't they have sleepovers?

Most girl only sleepovers don't involve everyone walking around naked.
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