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Old 01-09-2018, 09:07 AM
 
10,090 posts, read 6,467,629 times
Reputation: 23709

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Quote:
Originally Posted by eliza61nyc View Post
which probably leads me to think it was fake. I just don't label people bad parents based on a 1 minute you tube video. but I don't sling labels.
Parent that did some thing stupid? sure. like I said, if someone had followed me around I'm sure this crowd could just as easy made an argument for me being a "bad" parent.

But like I said, I've found that here, everyone is perfect. lol.
I am not perfect but somehow good enough that I don't make my kid smash their favorite item, taunt them and swear at them then put it online to boast about what a great parent I am.

I feel comfortable saying the guy is doing some very poor parenting and could use some assistance in learning how to parent.
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Old 01-09-2018, 09:13 AM
 
4,284 posts, read 1,455,971 times
Reputation: 9916
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattie View Post
I have zero respect for parents who choose YouTube( or social media) humiliation to discipline their children.

YES! Hallelujah, I feel the same way. Discipline is the loving thing to do, but doing it for YouTube, to embarrass your child...that's awful.


And I'm against destroying the gaming system. The father could've/should've used it as a reward for when the grades came back up.
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Old 01-09-2018, 09:34 AM
 
12,987 posts, read 12,391,651 times
Reputation: 37179
I hate stuff like this. Take it away like others have suggested and make them earn it back.

I have A TON of problems of parenting like this.
1) The father did this for his own self-aggrandizement. "Look what a tough dad I am"

2) And part of me also wonders where the heck the father was before the bad grades came in? The kid is pretty young in that video and not really of the "self-regulation" age. Why wasn't the father paying attention to what his kid was doing in school and how much time he was spending playing video games? He dropped the ball.

3) It's wasteful and destructive. Destroying an inanimate object to prove a point is just a waste of resources. And why encourage a child to beat something to pieces with a sledgehammer as the response to a problem?

4) It's basically modeling stupidity for the child. Rather than reselling it for some extra cash or putting it away, he has his kid destroy something that the family will likely just end up spending money on again later. Jesus, sell the thing and use it to pay for tutoring.

The kid was getting bad grades because he's being raised by a lazy moron, imo. Just drives us closer to idiocracy. Would have been nice maybe if the father posted a video of his kid reading a book or something, but I suspect that daddy doesn't model that kind of behavior either. It doesn't go viral, after all, does it?
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Old 01-09-2018, 09:34 AM
 
Location: U.S.A., Earth
4,327 posts, read 2,598,150 times
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Another point is while we don't know the circumstances behind the kid, we don't know the circumstances behind the father either. If he really didn't lift a finger, and just sat on the couch drinking beer and not really helping his child before his grades came in, then that speaks more poorly of him.
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Old 01-09-2018, 10:12 AM
 
15,165 posts, read 16,001,496 times
Reputation: 25011
Quote:
Originally Posted by eliza61nyc View Post
and everybody here is the paragon of sainthood with perfect children.

I'm sure if someone had followed me around with a video of me with my kids, I'd have been labeled a bad parent also.

Oh yes I have forced my kids to throw away their favorite toys for punishment. one kid is about to be an attorney, other son is a registered nurse, last son went to trade school and will probably be richer than everyone as a plumber/pipefitter.

don't think any are suffering major psychological damage. I guess if they turn into serial killers they can blame it on bad parenting. or go on Dr. Phil

I do agree, I don't get the obsession this country has with posting every thing on social media.
I'm not a perfect parent by a long shot, and my daughter isn't a perfect kid. But I never set out to publicly humiliate her and I tried to make consequences fit the occasion. This father is just a bully.
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Old 01-09-2018, 10:17 AM
 
27,993 posts, read 19,606,820 times
Reputation: 16471
Quote:
Originally Posted by eliza61nyc View Post
and everybody here is the paragon of sainthood with perfect children.

I'm sure if someone had followed me around with a video of me with my kids, I'd have been labeled a bad parent also.

Oh yes I have forced my kids to throw away their favorite toys for punishment. one kid is about to be an attorney, other son is a registered nurse, last son went to trade school and will probably be richer than everyone as a plumber/pipefitter.

don't think any are suffering major psychological damage. I guess if they turn into serial killers they can blame it on bad parenting. or go on Dr. Phil

I do agree, I don't get the obsession this country has with posting every thing on social media.
I'm not perfect nor are my children. But there are some absolutes of which I am sure:

I will NEVER film a punishment and post it online

I will NEVER force them to BREAK an item

I will NEVER approach a disciplinary action when I'm lost in the heat of anger (I learned to count to ten before responding many years ago)

I will NEVER beat or humiliate my children and call it parenting
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Old 01-09-2018, 10:18 AM
 
27,993 posts, read 19,606,820 times
Reputation: 16471
Quote:
Originally Posted by NDak15 View Post
I'm all for taking away things as punishment, but smashing them, filming it, and putting it on YouTube is going to far. Does anyone else think this kid is pretty pathetic for crying though?
Uh no. Not at all. Actually a pretty standard appropriate reaction to being humiliated and forced to break something one cherishes.

I find it odd you think its pathetic for a child to show emotion...
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Old 01-09-2018, 10:38 AM
 
747 posts, read 377,951 times
Reputation: 623
Quote:
Originally Posted by JanND View Post
Yes. I agree. Shaming someone seems unnecessary to me. And, I agree that Dad should have confiscated it and given the kid the opportunity to earn back the the privilege of playing it. A missed teachable moment.
My mom did something similar to me when I was in 8th grade - I hadn't done well on a report card, so she confiscated my stereo for the next grade-reporting period. (idea being I was supposed to bring my grades up, and then I'd get the stereo back)
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Old 01-09-2018, 10:43 AM
 
6,622 posts, read 2,572,167 times
Reputation: 18060
Quote:
Originally Posted by eliza61nyc View Post
and everybody here is the paragon of sainthood with perfect children.

I'm sure if someone had followed me around with a video of me with my kids, I'd have been labeled a bad parent also.

Oh yes I have forced my kids to throw away their favorite toys for punishment. one kid is about to be an attorney, other son is a registered nurse, last son went to trade school and will probably be richer than everyone as a plumber/pipefitter.

don't think any are suffering major psychological damage. I guess if they turn into serial killers they can blame it on bad parenting. or go on Dr. Phil

I do agree, I don't get the obsession this country has with posting every thing on social media.
Regardless of the fact that this didn't cause your children to commit suicide or drop out of school, forcing a child to throw away a beloved toy is cruel and damaging, at least to their relationship with you, even if they don't have the courage to say so. Even if you don't see it.

Punishment should fit the crime. If they hit another kid, they have to write a note of apology or otherwise make it up to the kid. If they steal something from the classroom, they have to take it back and apologize to the teacher, etc.

Making them throw away a favorite toy is on par with punitive hair cutting, which is recognized as child abuse.

There's a reason this generation is the kindest most accepting generation. Because the bulk of us raised our children with respect and empathy. Unlike prior generations where parents purposely treated their children cruelly.
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Old 01-09-2018, 10:59 AM
 
12,987 posts, read 12,391,651 times
Reputation: 37179
Quote:
Originally Posted by eliza61nyc View Post
OMG!! a parent who made a mistake. let's tar and feather him.
Get a gripe guys. the kid lost a favorite toy, I'm willing to bet he'll end up with another Xbox soon
So then the father is a moron. "Let's destroy something so we can buy a new one later."

He's not a cruel or awful parent, he's just too dumb to breed. Got it.
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