Is it common for you to not want your children to be anything like you? (parents, health)

[Juventud Guerrero]

Is it common or healthy for you to not want your children to be anything like you? Or is it better to share your interests with them? Is it better just to let them find out who they are completely on their own?

[purehuman]

I'd say it was uncommon.....can't say about the healthy part because I don't know anything about you.
I do agree that sharing your interests with them, AND them sharing their interests with you is a good thing.
I think too many times parents want their children to be who THEY want them to be, thus creating anger, misunderstandings, confusion, and brakedown of the relationship....

If the child adores his/her parent and wants to be like them...that's good too, and is (I believe) most often the case...especially with the very young ones.

They will "find out who they are"..in time...it doesn't hurt to influence them if it's to their benefit though...and of course to their liking.

There's a fine line between "infuencing" and "controlling" though.

[Vegabern]

Well, I rock so obviously I'd love my kids to be just like me . I worry more about turning into my own mom.


I think it's normal if it's in the sense of, I want them to do better or I want more for them. But if you think you're a bad enough person that you hope your kid isn't like you then you probably need to work on yourself a bit.