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“Parents, you had your shot at preparing your children for adulthood while they were growing up. By the time they reach college age you taught them everything they need to know to cope with adult life. If they didn't learn it then you did a poor job.”
Excellent post, although I do think parents can be asked for their opinions and advice no matter what age the offspring are. My sons occasionally ask. I never tell them what they should do, only what I probably would do.
The child’s whole life while growing up should be preparation for independence. That should not be just starting in college.
Oh, I didn't see your post as a reply to me because you didn't use the quote feature as intended.
To add to my thoughts, college is when your parents cease to be your parents and become your friends instead, special friends of course. They already had their shot at being parents, programming you, preparing you. Now as friends let's hope you have a good relationship with your parents (as with any other friends) and of course feel free to ask their advice. But don't ask them to make decisions for you. You're an adult now. It's time for you to make your own decisions.
The child's life up until adulthood should be preparation for independence. By the time they reach college age they should be adequately prepared to handle adult life and make their own decisions.
What, you're old enough to buy a gun and you still have to ask mommy and daddy to help you make your decisions? If so then we should raise the minimum age to purchase a gun to 21. Perhaps by then most people are able to handle the responsibilities required of an adult.
The next generation is screwed if this is the norm. Maybe 1-5% of them will make it. The rest will need basic income to survive.
What is this? (that you refer to)
If you mean not being able to handle college without mommy and daddy holding their hands, then yes they're screwed.
It makes me wonder what their parents were doing while these children were growing up. Whatever it was, it must have involved teaching crying as a viable solution to problems.
Just noting that unskilled jobs are slated for obsolescence as machines become more intelligent and there is less and less demand for unskilled labor. What unskilled labor jobs are available will be taken up by illegal aliens. You know, the ones we let stay because of amnesty and sanctuary area for international lawbreakers.
Maybe we need a law that parents are legally responsible for supporting their 20 and 30 year old children until said children manage a means to support themselves.
Why should I as a taxpayer be asked to support the mistakes of parents who didn't do their parenting jobs properly?
The next generation is screwed if this is the norm. Maybe 1-5% of them will make it. The rest will need basic income to survive.
won't happen, basic income that is
what's the point of giving money to people when they can't use it like adults?
better to give them precooked meals so they don't have to buy fresh food and not know how to cook it
better to give them a locked room because they don't know how to take care of their homes
better to chain them to a desk because they dont know how to find a job on their own
sorry, if someone is going to rely on govt to hand them money so they can buy a life, that life is going to be short and miserable.
the closest thing to basic income currently is social security, ask an senior who lives on purely social security if they envy their lifestyle. Average SS payment is $1400/month, that doesn't go far in the city, and seniors living in rural areas where it goes farther, if they aren't in good health, then they sit at home and suffer from lack of healthcare and no family members around because they are in the city working
your idea of college is an expensive daycare for adults who can't be adults?
we need mandatory military service for everyone 18-20, at least they will learn to put on their boots and finish a job
In a sense you are right and I agree about the military. However, few young people who have always lived in their parents home, are unprepared to simply be dropped off at the corner of Main and First - and told, "You're on your own now."
The military is a good 'sheltered environment' within which to make that transition, but, higher education is still necessary -- and 4-years as a military private only provides experience, not education. The real problem with today's colleges is that liberal professors and administrators 'coddle snowflakes,' rather than prepare young people for the next step in life.
what's the point of giving money to people when they can't use it like adults?
Send them back to their parents and tell their parents to support these useless people.
I've never seen a better argument for birth control as this topic. Specifically, the parents of these children, their parents' parents should have exercised birth control. Solve the problem at its source.
In a sense you are right and I agree about the military. However, few young people who have always lived in their parents home, are unprepared to simply be dropped off at the corner of Main and First - and told, "You're on your own now."
The military is a good 'sheltered environment' within which to make that transition, but, higher education is still necessary -- and 4-years as a military private only provides experience, not education. The real problem with today's colleges is that liberal professors and administrators 'coddle snowflakes,' rather than prepare young people for the next step in life.
Parents had 18 years to teach their kids.... how is it a "sudden" drop off at the corner?
same with the military and education, they spent 12 years in "school"... why bother with that if they aren't "educated"?
really, what do people expect out of 2-4 years of college if they didn't learn how to be adults in the past 18 years?
college isn't even there to guide people into adulthood, so in the 2-4 years they spent there, they could have learned the exact same life skills backpacking around the world on $5/day (when they ran out, they worked for more money)
what is this "next" step in life that college provides? that isn't the purpose of college... if I went back at age 40,50,60, is that a "next" step? Or because I choose to learn something new, whether I intend to apply it to life or not, it was my choice. It is not a "next" step. The choice to attend or not, is the step, college was just the path the step was on but not the destination
edit: probably came across as disagreeing with you? think we are on same page really, but I'm annoyed that people think college is a "step" in life, when it is really only a choice. whether you attend college or not, it has no impact on how your life will go because you can make bad choices with or without college
the closest thing to basic income currently is social security, ask an senior who lives on purely social security if they envy their lifestyle. Average SS payment is $1400/month, that doesn't go far in the city, and seniors living in rural areas where it goes farther, if they aren't in good health, then they sit at home and suffer from lack of healthcare and no family members around because they are in the city working
Just remember that people who live on Social Security paid into the system for perhaps 40-50 years. They are spending money they earned themselves.
In those same 40-50 years they had ample opportunities to build wealth, or to urinate it away on credit card debt, fancy vacations, new cars every 3 years, toys.
That's about what I get for my Social Security income. I just spent the last month running up a 5 digit credit card balance redecorating my house (which I own with no mortgage and has a half mil plus valuation). Oh, I also own a rental house, used to own 4 rentals. (Jeez I hate tenants. Most of them must have got their educations like the ppl we're discussing in this topic.)
Your life is what you make it. If you made a bad life then you have only yourself to blame. Most of my retired friends are having the same great life I'm having. We didn't spend our income fecklessly. We invested it smartly. That's how you end up with a good retirement.
Actually half of my Social Security goes to pay my property taxes. I'm glad I don't have to live on the other half, that would cover mainly food and utilities and nothing else.
By the way, I pay all my credit cards full balance every month. That's another way to end up in good shape when you retire. Money spend on credit card interest is wasted money. I've never paid credit card interest.
Oh, I didn't see your post as a reply to me because you didn't use the quote feature as intended.
To add to my thoughts, college is when your parents cease to be your parents and become your friends instead, special friends of course. They already had their shot at being parents, programming you, preparing you. Now as friends let's hope you have a good relationship with your parents (as with any other friends) and of course feel free to ask their advice. But don't ask them to make decisions for you. You're an adult now. It's time for you to make your own decisions.
The child's life up until adulthood should be preparation for independence. By the time they reach college age they should be adequately prepared to handle adult life and make their own decisions.
What, you're old enough to buy a gun and you still have to ask mommy and daddy to help you make your decisions? If so then we should raise the minimum age to purchase a gun to 21. Perhaps by then most people are able to handle the responsibilities required of an adult.
My post—the one in which I didn’t use the quote feature—wasn’t precisely a reply to you. This is. The excerpt was excellent and I agreed with it. I wanted to point it out as an example. It was easier to copy that part of it than to go in and remove the rest of the post to highlight the part I wanted.
I agree with your thinking on preparation of children for independence and said essencially the same thing. I was on my own by age eighteen with a relatively smooth transition and prepared my sons to do the same.
I have a child in college, most of my friends' kids are in 4-year colleges. I really don't see much difference in the level of parental involvement that I had when I was in college. My daughter gets even less from me. I lived on campus for 3 years (and did a fourth year studying abroad), while she has her own apartment and has to feed herself and pay bills on the money she saved working over the summer (about $300 a month). The folks I went to college with (even those who got liberal arts degrees) are doing well, approaching retirement and seemed to suffer no ill-effects from overparenting.
Like anything, a lot of reality is exaggerated by people with a jealous ax to grind.
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