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Old 03-30-2008, 04:20 PM
 
Location: Chicago
2,481 posts, read 8,813,984 times
Reputation: 787

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Quote:
Originally Posted by KimK View Post
Well, I did keep trying the number and they called me. The first question I was asked was "do you want to adopt this baby?" We said, "Yes." Apparently, this baby was born at the end of January (which I did not know) and neither parent has done one thing to include even visiting the baby. They are not giving up their parental rights however but their service plan has been reduced to no more than six months so we are half way through now. And, yes there are intrastate compacts so that Ca. will direct my state to prepare the way. Also, since CPS is in favor of this, no attorney will be necessary. More money for baby things....

I was also told that neither parent even mentioned my name to them as a potential guardian or else the child would have been with us immediately. CPS was quite relieved to hear from me.

My child is ten now so all I can say is WOW....Thanks to all of you for taking an interest. I have found through the years that offering burearacy solutions to "their" problems is often the best approach. Have a great day. We sure are!!!

I'm so happy to hear that it worked out!
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Old 03-30-2008, 05:41 PM
 
2,152 posts, read 2,370,515 times
Reputation: 2093
What state are you in? Are you for sure going to be able to get the child? Is the baby a boy or girl? Is there anything you need? Maybe some of us can help you get some things.. I have some infant boy clothes for instance. Or maybe you need formula or formula coupons? Lets us know and maybe others will lend a hand
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Old 03-30-2008, 06:29 PM
 
Location: Chicago
2,481 posts, read 8,813,984 times
Reputation: 787
You should also be receiving $$$ from the state until the adoption is final, at the very least
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Old 03-30-2008, 08:31 PM
 
385 posts, read 1,083,765 times
Reputation: 196
Yes, it does seem like a pretty sure thing. The parents can fight this but they have little or no ammunition beyond the ability to hire an attorney. Their performance has been despicable per the CPS people. To add insult to injury, my brother told them we are half Cherokee (for what reason I cannot guess). To my surprise, we now have to provide a history of our family back to my great grandparents. We are not in any way, shape or form related to any Cherokees but unfortunately now this has to go through a separate court hearing to resolve any question. I told them I hoped this also would reflect on his veracity at the time they wish to terminate his rights.

I am in New Mexico. I was told I would get the benefits until the adoption is final. I also asked that the child be able to get medical assistance beyond the adoption. While she is considered a "well baby" she is significantly premature and has some of those issues that I expect will resolve with age.

My daughter and I have been kicking ourselves for the last few days about having sold or donated her baby clothes. You can't keep everything and yet they do grow out of them so quickly.

Thanks so much for the kind thoughts. How about I will keep people updated and you all can lend me some much needed advice?
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Old 03-30-2008, 11:55 PM
 
2,152 posts, read 2,370,515 times
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hmm I wonder what it matters if you are part Cherokee or not? Genetic background shouldn't play a part in you being able to care for the child

Either way, please keep us posted if you need some items. I know I can send some things your way if need be.
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Old 03-31-2008, 07:06 AM
LML
 
Location: Wisconsin
7,090 posts, read 5,409,919 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NEOhioBound View Post
hmm I wonder what it matters if you are part Cherokee or not? Genetic background shouldn't play a part in you being able to care for the child

Either way, please keep us posted if you need some items. I know I can send some things your way if need be.
It matters because, if the child WAS part Cherokee, there would have to be a hearing as to if the child could be adopted outside the Cherokee nation. This was set up quite awhile ago to keep Native American children within their culture. Some good points. Some bad points.
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Old 03-31-2008, 11:41 AM
 
3,379 posts, read 5,849,109 times
Reputation: 4654
I recently had a similar experience with my estranged brother and his step daughter... long story short, through the family grapevine, I heard that my neice's mom tried to commit suicide. When the girls were brought to my brother's home, the older girl found out that he was not her bio father as he wouldn't take her in. Legally, CPS could do nothing about it. By the time I heard about it and contacted CPS (it took about 5 days to get to me), she was already placed in another family member's home (on her mom's side).

I didn't know her or her mom's legal last name or their county of residence (and wasn't about to call my a$$ of a brother for the information), but it only took an hour on the phone with IL's DCFS to find her social worker. They did take my name and number and said they would contact me if the current home she is in doesn't work out.

I haven't seen this girl in 10 years and she lives in IL - I live in CO. DCFS saw no problem with it at all... they like to keep children with family members whenever possible - even when there's been no contact and no blood.
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Old 03-31-2008, 12:50 PM
 
Location: Manchester, NH
282 posts, read 795,585 times
Reputation: 231
Contact your state Department of Health and human services and the division for child protection. They should be able to help you. There is out of state foster care/placement-it is under the jurisdiction of the Interstate Compact for the Placement of Children. Your state's DCYF or DSS, whatever you have there, would need to do a home study, etc and license you as a placement, etc. This is how it works in NH, and it should be the same everywhere. Good luck.
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Old 03-31-2008, 07:36 PM
 
Location: Chicago
2,481 posts, read 8,813,984 times
Reputation: 787
Quote:
Originally Posted by KimK View Post
Yes, it does seem like a pretty sure thing. The parents can fight this but they have little or no ammunition beyond the ability to hire an attorney. Their performance has been despicable per the CPS people. To add insult to injury, my brother told them we are half Cherokee (for what reason I cannot guess). To my surprise, we now have to provide a history of our family back to my great grandparents. We are not in any way, shape or form related to any Cherokees but unfortunately now this has to go through a separate court hearing to resolve any question. I told them I hoped this also would reflect on his veracity at the time they wish to terminate his rights.

I am in New Mexico. I was told I would get the benefits until the adoption is final. I also asked that the child be able to get medical assistance beyond the adoption. While she is considered a "well baby" she is significantly premature and has some of those issues that I expect will resolve with age.

My daughter and I have been kicking ourselves for the last few days about having sold or donated her baby clothes. You can't keep everything and yet they do grow out of them so quickly.

Thanks so much for the kind thoughts. How about I will keep people updated and you all can lend me some much needed advice?
Quote:
Originally Posted by NEOhioBound View Post
hmm I wonder what it matters if you are part Cherokee or not? Genetic background shouldn't play a part in you being able to care for the child

Either way, please keep us posted if you need some items. I know I can send some things your way if need be.

This is because of the Indian Child Welfare Act

The Indian Child Welfare Act and the States

Historically, us lovely Americans would kidnap Native American children and place them in group homes/foster homes to "civilize" them and the social workers who did this would literally be paid per child. Needless to say, we were destroying a whole generation of their culture. So, since the 70's, children who have any Native American ancestry can only be adopted with the consent on the tribal court, if they choose to be involved. If you adopt a child and violate the ICWA, the adoption can be deemed to be invalid. So, basically, whether or not the child in Native American is a really, really big deal that all agencies MUST ask whether the child is Native American (per federal law) and this can totally can impact the adoption, etc
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Old 03-31-2008, 08:24 PM
 
385 posts, read 1,083,765 times
Reputation: 196
It is totally understandable about Native American children and their welfare. We simply are very minimally Native American, if at all. We do have a question about my great grandmother whose origins were a big secret for reasons that were unknown. She was somewhat dark skinned. She literally showed up in Georgia when she was an older teenager. That is pretty much where facts end. People in south at that time were loathe to admit any African American heritage. Rather when questioned they would say they were Native Americans. I think that is true of African Americans as well (at least that was part of an interesting special on African American roots on PBS recently). So, our myth was that my great grandmother was of Native American descent while in reality she was probably part African American.

Now, where the Cherokee comes from I never heard that. It could be purely my brother's rampant, drug induced imagination. So, they are going to pursue some fact finding on my great grandmother but as I pointed out to them, she was at best one half native american which would make this child 1/32 and they only consider down to 1/16.

I would like to know how they do this. I think we can have a DNA test ourselves that show all our lineage, can we not? I was actually considering having it done before all this came up (I was hoping for sane relatives somewhere in my past).
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