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Old 04-03-2018, 05:08 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
38,129 posts, read 36,926,545 times
Reputation: 72055

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Quote:
Originally Posted by calgirlinnc View Post
If I can't get in touch with her parents, any other suggestions?

The school has an anonymous bullying/harassment online reporting system. I've considered that...
This is not a time to be anonymous.

Your son needs to see you advocating for him so that he knows how to advocate for himself in the future. And the girl and all her friends need to know to that this is unacceptable.

If you're going to involve the school, do It in person. Meet with the principal ASAP.

But make an effort to reach her parents. Go directly to the source.
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Old 04-03-2018, 06:18 AM
 
3,666 posts, read 2,851,041 times
Reputation: 4558
Quote:
Originally Posted by zentropa View Post
Don't you know her name? Surely she is prominent on your son's social media feeds.
Yes of course I know her name.

My son only has one social media platform...she was on it for a little while but doesn't follow him
now.
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Old 04-03-2018, 06:19 AM
 
3,666 posts, read 2,851,041 times
Reputation: 4558
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
This is not a time to be anonymous.

Your son needs to see you advocating for him so that he knows how to advocate for himself in the future. And the girl and all her friends need to know to that this is unacceptable.

If you're going to involve the school, do It in person. Meet with the principal ASAP.

But make an effort to reach her parents. Go directly to the source.
Good advice; thank you.
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Old 04-03-2018, 06:22 AM
 
156 posts, read 77,824 times
Reputation: 225
Quote:
Originally Posted by calgirlinnc View Post
Ha, my thoughts exactly!

If I can't get in touch with her parents, any other suggestions?

The school has an anonymous bullying/harassment online reporting system. I've considered that...
If there is no way for you to contact the parents, I would contact your son's guidance counselor or social worker at the school. That is ridiculous for these kids to be doing this to your son. Definitely get the screenshots.


Sounds like this girl and her friends have some real issues.
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Old 04-03-2018, 08:02 AM
 
Location: Brew City
2,994 posts, read 1,874,300 times
Reputation: 3993
Find out who the parents are and speak with them.

And in the future, KNOW the parents.
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Old 04-03-2018, 08:12 AM
 
3,901 posts, read 1,322,128 times
Reputation: 9082
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
This is not a time to be anonymous.

Your son needs to see you advocating for him so that he knows how to advocate for himself in the future. And the girl and all her friends need to know to that this is unacceptable.

If you're going to involve the school, do It in person. Meet with the principal ASAP.

But make an effort to reach her parents. Go directly to the source.

Man...I don't know. Kids at this age...ESPECIALLY girls, can be very very dramatic. And mean. I personally think it would be better to be anonymous. Because if OP goes marching down to school demanding to talk to the principal...it's going to get around school and THEN the kids will harass the son about how his mommy has to fight his battles for him, and he's such a *****, and blah blah blah.
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Old 04-03-2018, 08:18 AM
 
891 posts, read 546,255 times
Reputation: 1403
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
This is not a time to be anonymous.

Your son needs to see you advocating for him so that he knows how to advocate for himself in the future. And the girl and all her friends need to know to that this is unacceptable.

If you're going to involve the school, do It in person. Meet with the principal ASAP
Wow, thatís terrible advice. The kid would never live that down. This is high school not 2nd grade.

OP, DO NOT make a public show of this- your son will have a terrible time trying to live that down socially.
Tell the parents, or the school, but do it privately/ with your sonís remaining years of school in mind.
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Old 04-03-2018, 08:21 AM
 
3,666 posts, read 2,851,041 times
Reputation: 4558
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sassybluesy View Post
Man...I don't know. Kids at this age...ESPECIALLY girls, can be very very dramatic. And mean. I personally think it would be better to be anonymous. Because if OP goes marching down to school demanding to talk to the principal...it's going to get around school and THEN the kids will harass the son about how his mommy has to fight his battles for him, and he's such a *****, and blah blah blah.
This is a fair point as well.

I don't think it is right that they've called him awful names and cursed at him. And the video she sent, while really crude and rude, was just a video.

What disturbs me is that she wants to know our address. I can think of no innocent reason for that.

But what am I going to say about that exactly?

As far as knowing the parents, sure, (as PP wrote) in an ideal situation. But this HS has 3200 kids. We've lived here 6 months. I'm not exactly sure how I'm supposed to have known them. Remember, they haven't actually "gone out". We tried a couple of times to invite the girl to do some things as a family, but her parents always said no.
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Old 04-03-2018, 08:28 AM
 
3,666 posts, read 2,851,041 times
Reputation: 4558
Also in general I'm really shocked at how vindictive the girl seems.


SHE called it off to begin with. And now she is going crazy on him with the "you ruined my life"'comments and "how could you break up with me".

I've really had to emphasize to my son that he did nothing wrong, that he is NOT a jerk (because he isn't), and that he has a right to go out with someone or not.

He has anxiety so her over the top reaction is doubly worse.
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Old 04-03-2018, 08:31 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
38,129 posts, read 36,926,545 times
Reputation: 72055
Quote:
Originally Posted by BLDSoon View Post
Wow, thatís terrible advice. The kid would never live that down. This is high school not 2nd grade.

OP, DO NOT make a public show of this- your son will have a terrible time trying to live that down socially.
The girl and her friends have already made a "public" show of it. You don't think all their friends already know what's happening?

I've been an overly dramatic teenage girl before, and if someone doesn't check her behavior now, she will grow up to inflict more pain on others.
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