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Old 04-08-2018, 09:51 AM
 
Location: Denver area
21,071 posts, read 21,927,238 times
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Yep on quiet time. You cannot force someone to sleep. You can have quiet time where they are expected to stay in their room with lights dimmed or curtain closed and maybe some calming music on. No electronics. Books or otherwise playing quietly by themselves permitted. Great time for parent to read quietly as well. Set the example.
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Old 04-08-2018, 09:56 AM
 
Location: Denver area
21,071 posts, read 21,927,238 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MillennialUrbanist View Post
Choice? You mean like voting for _____ or _______ in the 2020 election? Where the "choice" is an illusion, and we're screwed no matter who wins.


I know that. But "special toy time" is more difficult for the kid to figure out than "quiet time", because he/she will be thrown off by the word "toy". At least until he/she learns the truth. But I rest my case at this point. <shrug>
Um..see below..your words...

Quote:
Originally Posted by MillennialUrbanist View Post
... kids are much better mind-readers than parents give them credit for. In other words, they'll know that "quiet time", "rest hour", or whatever euphemism parents use, are thinly veiled code words for the same old boring nap time. Even if you tell them to just "lie in bed quietly for a while", you won't fool the kid. Especially if you won't let him/her get up. Bed = nap, plain and simple.

I suppose it's different when sleeping---oops, I mean "lying quietly in bed" ---isn't mandatory, but still. Kids are smart. They'll know. As a childfree person, I'm not sure what I can suggest. Maybe having the kid play with non-electronic, non-mechanized toys? Like, arranging blocks, moving toy cars around, or looking at picture books. No iPads, obviously. And call it "special toy time" or something.
You are missing the point of quiet time. Kids do not have to lie in bed doing nothing. They can read, play with non electronic toys or listen to quiet music. It's not the same as napping and gives everyone a chance for a breather in the afternoon.
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Old 04-08-2018, 10:12 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
38,146 posts, read 36,945,048 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maciesmom View Post
You are missing the point of quiet time. Kids do not have to lie in bed doing nothing. They can read, play with non electronic toys or listen to quiet music. It's not the same as napping and gives everyone a chance for a breather in the afternoon.
Yep. And it teaches them a bit of independence as well, as they learn to manage their own "alone time."

So MU can "rest his case," which is really "our case." LOL
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Old 04-08-2018, 10:17 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MillennialUrbanist View Post
Choice? You mean like voting for _____ or _______ in the 2020 election? Where the "choice" is a big illusion, and we're screwed no matter who wins.
If you want to continue to look at it from a child's point of view, then yes, you're screwed because you're gonna take a nap/entertain yourself in your room no matter what, even though that's not what you as a kid would want.

Effective parents know that giving their child this kind of "choice" works and is good for them because the assumption is that parents know best. So if a child throws a fit about going to school, we say, "You have a choice. You can wear blue shorts or red shorts to school today." The child makes a choice, but not about going to school. The overall lesson is that they are going to school, no matter what.

The election analogy doesn't apply, and the semantics of whether choice is an illusion or we are fooling them are irrelevant. We know that a child that age needs rest and a parent needs down time. So call it nap time or quiet time or toy time, it's happening.
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Old 04-08-2018, 11:15 AM
 
Location: Central IL
12,995 posts, read 6,875,898 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CarnivalGal View Post
I am willing to bet that it has everything to do with the fact that your daughter had much more of a regular routine at daycare than she does at home. I have found that daycare providers and preschool teachers are much more consistent with schedules, expectations, consequences, etc. than parents, which usually translates to different behaviors. If your daughter found it too light, too hot, too whatever at school, she knew that there was nothing that would be done about it (probably because there was nothing that could be done), so there was no point in her trying to fight it. She knows that's not the case now.

I would suggest finding a schedule that works and sticking to it. Once she falls into the new routine, she will probably go back to going down for a nap with no problem.
This and that she is getting a LOT of attention from mom trying to get her to sleep. So transitioning to "quiet time" and letting HER entertain herself, even if she is not sleeping. All that attention getting her to sleep is not helping. Give her the option to look at books OR sleep and then leave her (pretty much) alone to do it. And, have a schedule.
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Old 04-08-2018, 11:59 AM
 
Location: San Antonio
3,124 posts, read 9,098,025 times
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She might be done napping. This is around the age many kids stop napping. My first never napped again after about 23 months old, but my second kept napping until just after 3 years old. She may be done napping. Good luck!
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Old 04-08-2018, 12:57 PM
 
4,007 posts, read 3,350,105 times
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I would suggest be certain that she is getting plenty of exercise & keeps an approximate same daily routine.

Our quite rambunctious sons would happily take naps (or go to sleep at nightime after bedtime reading of story books) --- if listening to a book on tape.

This was back in the cassette player days & they wore out their favorites & we'd get replacements...Hank the cowdog stories were a fav.... Check Audible on Amazon Prime. Or sometimes they chose kids music, like we sing silly songs.

There was always something going on either outside or in the house on busy ranch & they didn't want to miss out, so the books on tape were a type of white noise which worked great.
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Old 04-08-2018, 02:05 PM
 
3,273 posts, read 3,197,345 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MAPPLEBY811 View Post
My daughter is 2 years and 7 months old. Up until last month, she went to daycare during the day while both my wife and I worked full time. While in daycare, she had no trouble with naps. Their napping setup there was individual cots for all the kids, who slept in a communal room with the lights dimmed. In all her time there, she never had any problems with napping, regularly sleeping over two hours. She also napped just fine on weekends at home with us.

However, ever since my wife started maternity leave last month (the new baby isn't here yet, she just has a physically strenuous job that she can't do while 8 months pregnant) our daughter has been very resistant to naps. My wife will easily spend over an hour every day repeatedly putting her back into bed. My daughter's recurring complaint is that "it's not dark out." We have black out curtains in her room which block all the light from outside, except for a small sliver that sneaks in the gap between the curtain and the wall. We also have a white noise machine, and we've used this setup since she was an infant.

The odd part is that, once she finally does get to sleep, she'll easily sleep for two to three hours. We've considered weaning her off of afternoon naps, but we're not sure that she's really ready to give up naps based on how long she eventually sleeps, and also we think that we're [i]really[i] going to want her to be taking naps once the new baby is here.

We'd really love any advice you could offer on how to make her more comfortable with going down for naps, or if you really think maybe we should start weaning her. And if you need any more information, please don't hesitate to ask

Thanks so much!
It's completely normal for a child her age to give up naps. My daughter (who unbeknownst to us had ADHD), gave up her nap at 21 months old. When they give up their nap, they usually go to bed much earlier.

Yes, after fighting with her for an hour or two, she may finally fall asleep, and sleep for a couple of hours, but then she'll probably be up late. Not worth the battle. How would you like it if someone forced you to take a nap when you weren't tired?
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Old 04-08-2018, 03:28 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
38,146 posts, read 36,945,048 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by historyfan View Post
Our quite rambunctious sons would happily take naps (or go to sleep at nightime after bedtime reading of story books) --- if listening to a book on tape.

This was back in the cassette player days & they wore out their favorites & we'd get replacements...Hank the cowdog stories were a fav.... Check Audible on Amazon Prime. Or sometimes they chose kids music, like we sing silly songs.
Oh my gosh, I forgot about books on tape. My sons loved those! Hank the Cowdog was a favorite in our house too

We also listened to some Disney stories at naptime. I bet if I played one today, my sons would fall asleep when that theme music cued LOL.
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Old 04-08-2018, 05:38 PM
 
Location: Dfw
324 posts, read 88,684 times
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Then drop the nap! At that age you can drop the nap and the child will just go to sleep earlier.
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