Son doesn't want new shoes (girl, college, problem, graduated)
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Thank you all who were not critical. Apparently I have also been kicked out of the "parents" club since my "child" is over 6 years old... I actually thought that was rather funny/sad/not sure what else.
Have a glorious Memorial weekend!!
You are a parent. Ignore those who think you should no longer consider yourself a legitimate poster on this forum. And, happy weekend to you too.
i never like new shoes either, they are uncomfortable, tight, your friend make fun of them, stepping on your toes to scuff them up. I hated new shoew, use to rub dirt on them to make them look old.
This sounds like my son, who is a mid-teenager now. He is also on the spectrum and getting him to wear new shoes (we buy them) is a challenge. We have a pair sitting here in wait for him. They are the same exact brand, size, style as his current (falling apart) shoes. Once his other shoes no longer stay on his feet, I am guessing he will start wearing the new ones. That's what he's done before. Frustrating, but I agree that it'll have to get figured out by him. I am glad to hear he's successful and has some independence. That's huge. I hope I see that result in another 4-5 years for my son!
Sure. But I think parenting groups and parenting boards should be limited to people with kids 18 and under. I joined a few parent groups when my child was a toddler and was shocked to find they were dominated by parents of "kids" in their 20s. Helicopter parenting is out of control these days. I think some of these parents simply want the same recognition and special consideration they received back when their kids were small. Or possibly they are going through "empty nest syndrome" and are in denial. But sorry, it ends and we have to accept at some point that our children are grown and need to be making their own choices. And although you're still a parent, you are not parenting and don't belong in mommy clubs.
I have belonged to copious amounts of parenting groups, currently and in the past. I have NEVER seen one dominated by parents of kids in the 20s. Never. Not one single time. I think you should keep looking because I think you were looking in the wrong place.
If it bothers you she is posting about her 20 year old son with special needs, don't read the post. It isn't that hard.
You too! And since my son is still young enough, he's already been told his Memorial Day weekend will include some shoe shopping.
I actually think that the shopping part is the worst thing for him - not that he doesn't prefer his comfy broken in (albeit too small) shoes, but once he actually has new shoes that are reasonably comfortable, he doesn't mind wearing them, it's the process of acquiring them that he objects to the most.
Updating to say that we had a short but successful shoe shopping excursion. My son tried on 4 pairs, we settled on a pair of Keens that as long as I remember to call them shoes and not sandals are acceptable. He even admitted that the fact that they are semi-open and will therefore be cool seemed like a good thing.
We'll have to go back again in another few months for a back to school pair, but at 13 turning 14, his feet grow too fast to buy something now. But since this was a fairly painless trip, I think I can get him back to the store again then without it feeling like too much of an ordeal.
Went and bought 3 pairs of shoes. All slip ons, one leather for work, one canvas also can be used for work, and rubber sandles. When he got home I handed them to him and asked him to try them on. Although they were all a size too big he liked them. I am out of town now but he wanted to go to store and exchange for correct sizes, which he did with the help of a employee to find a correct size. He acted as if he could hardly wait to wear them, didn't want to wait til Monday when I'm back. I was afraid there might be issue with receipt, plus I left $20 coupon at home they would credit me if I bought it in. He took care of that and has shoes!!!! Hurrah!!!!
Wishing success to other moms/dads here with their shoe issues!
I have to wonder, was this a ploy to have me pay for shoes. Nah, I think he has hit a new milestone of getting past shoe issues. I hope he has. Just took some prodding. Gentle but covertly persistence pays off.
Last edited by Izzie1213; 06-09-2018 at 11:05 PM..
I have belonged to copious amounts of parenting groups, currently and in the past. I have NEVER seen one dominated by parents of kids in the 20s. Never. Not one single time. I think you should keep looking because I think you were looking in the wrong place.
.
I can find tons of posts on this very board by parents of adult children. So it stands to reason they dominate IRL groups as well. And they do.
I can find tons of posts on this very board by parents of adult children. So it stands to reason they dominate IRL groups as well. And they do.
That empty nest syndrome must be a real witch.
You haven't walked in my shoes, glass houses and all that. Without the support of a parents who truly understand their kids with issues they will struggle into adulthood. He has made great strides and is truly capable of doing things himself. But it doesn't hurt for him to have a bit of backup from me and other supportive people in his life to succeed to his full potential. He has really done things himself, I can't force a lot, it wouldn't work. I am proud of him.
Went and bought 3 pairs of shoes. All slip ons, one leather for work, one canvas also can be used for work, and rubber sandles. When he got home I handed them to him and asked him to try them on. Although they were all a size too big he liked them. I am out of town now but he wanted to go to store and exchange for correct sizes, which he did with the help of a employee to find a correct size. He acted as if he could hardly wait to wear them, didn't want to wait til Monday when I'm back. I was afraid there might be issue with receipt, plus I left $20 coupon at home they would credit me if I bought it in. He took care of that and has shoes!!!! Hurrah!!!!
Wishing success to other moms/dads here with their shoe issues!
I have to wonder, was this a ploy to have me pay for shoes. Nah, I think he has hit a new milestone of getting past shoe issues. I hope he has. Just took some prodding. Gentle but covertly persistence pays off.
Congrats, that sounds like a real step forward (no pun intended!)
Not knowing your son, of course, but it doesn't sound like finances were something he really thought about. Or maybe I'm projecting and trying to imagine my own kiddo thinking about the money aspect as opposed to me torturing him by wanting him to wear clothing and shoes that fit! lolol!
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