U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
 
 
Old 09-22-2018, 08:56 AM
 
Location: Charlotte Area
3,165 posts, read 2,895,274 times
Reputation: 3519

Advertisements

No. Not at all. My thinking is that they don't have the money to pay for a sitter. It's not his sister's fault and he seems to be taking it out on her.
Quick reply to this message

 
Old 09-22-2018, 09:21 AM
 
Location: Wisconsin
16,470 posts, read 15,905,878 times
Reputation: 38730
Thank you everyone for your responses. I also had never heard of anyone expecting that you also pay for the babysitter when you give a gift like that.

It was really out of character for the older brother to act like that. I wondered if he meant it as a joke and sent it via text/email and his sister misunderstood and took it seriously. If that is the case then the joke is on him as she never gave him another expensive birthday gift in the following years.

Another possibility is he had gotten used to his wife's wealthy parents giving them tickets to things and then offering to babysit (obviously for free to spend time with their grandchild) or maybe paying for a babysitter. I really don't know if they did that but I could easily picture it happening. But, something that your wealthy in-laws may (or may not do) is completely different from expecting your broke college student little sister to do it.

It really is not a big deal, but it came up in conversation recently and I wanted to get other opinions on it. I think that it was probably meant as a joke but the sister really thought (both then and now) that he meant it seriously.

Thanks.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-22-2018, 11:47 AM
 
Location: colorado springs, CO
3,996 posts, read 1,774,084 times
Reputation: 13779
Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626 View Post
It was really out of character for the older brother to act like that. I wondered if he meant it as a joke and sent it via text/email and his sister misunderstood and took it seriously.
That must be it!

I love "dry" humor in conversation but I'm easily fooled by it in text because there are no non-verbal cues. I can't tell if it's "tongue in cheek" if I can't see your cheek or a person's eyes for that matter.

When I bought my son & DIL a gift card to a popular restaurant a few years ago, I did drop a hint or two (in person) that if they didn't have anyone in mind for babysitting when they wanted to use it that I would probably be available.

I was a young mom once too & I know I always preferred my parents over the dad's parents for babysitting, so I didn't want to come off as though there were strings attached. If I would have written it; I probably wouldn't have tried to be funny, because without emojis I'm not good at being funny in text.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-22-2018, 11:58 AM
 
11,229 posts, read 9,225,730 times
Reputation: 14654
Quote:
Originally Posted by Spuggy View Post
Wow No. what a jerk
This.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-22-2018, 12:18 PM
 
Location: X marks the spot
546 posts, read 175,647 times
Reputation: 836
I'd file that under, no good deed goes unpunished.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-22-2018, 12:22 PM
 
1,326 posts, read 526,801 times
Reputation: 2308
Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626 View Post
If you give a gift such as concert tickets, to a couple, are you also expected to pay for their babysitter so they can attend the concert? This situation recently came up with some younger friends and I am curious about what other people think.

A college student that I know splurged to give her older brother and his wife (who both have full time jobs) two tickets to a concert that he wanted to attended. Normally she would give a small gift, or a home made gift, to her brother for his birthday but spent at least four times what she would normally spent on his gift to buy two concert tickets. And, while he was (mostly) appreciative of the gift, he informed her that "it was not polite to buy tickets for a night out unless you also include enough money to pay for a babysitter."

Frankly, I had never heard of an etiquette rule like that. So, was she in the wrong or was he just making that up or is this something new or what?

Thank you for any input.

Oops, maybe this should be in Non-romantic relationships instead, but I was wondering what people who needed to pay for baby sitters (parents) thought about this issue.
It might have been nice if the gifter offered to babysit when presenting the tickets (unless she lived far away or was going too) but no she shouldn't be expected to pay for the babysitter or be one. The brother is out of line since if he paid for the tickets he would have to find a babysitter. Perhaps he was trying to guilt his sister into sitting for them.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-22-2018, 01:06 PM
 
Location: Northern panhandle WV
2,247 posts, read 1,744,626 times
Reputation: 4547
The sister is not the one that had the kids. His kids his babysitting problem!

I assume this is the last really nice gift she will ever get her brother.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-22-2018, 01:12 PM
 
5,808 posts, read 3,295,904 times
Reputation: 13547
Ridiculous! This sounds like a brother who enjoys putting his younger sister down.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-22-2018, 03:51 PM
 
Location: SW Florida
9,096 posts, read 3,918,635 times
Reputation: 18756
If he was serious he is an ungrateful jerk.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-22-2018, 03:51 PM
 
3,174 posts, read 1,629,375 times
Reputation: 15313
NO! I've never heard of such a thing.
Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


 

Quick Reply
Message:
Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
Similar Threads
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2018, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top