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Old 09-22-2018, 03:59 PM
 
11,229 posts, read 9,228,214 times
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Gift and expect do not belong together in any sentence I can think of. (Unless I work at it )
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Old 09-22-2018, 08:51 PM
 
Location: Texas
6,433 posts, read 2,346,379 times
Reputation: 13822
Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626 View Post
If you give a gift such as concert tickets, to a couple, are you also expected to pay for their babysitter so they can attend the concert?
No. But when people give us concert tickets, theater tickets, restaurant gift cards - we just don't use them. We can't. We can't take our kids to those places, they're too young, and it would cost a lot to hire a sitter for three kids.
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Old 09-23-2018, 12:23 AM
 
Location: The World
3,012 posts, read 1,810,469 times
Reputation: 7773
How incredibly awful. I can't imagine how hurt the sister was after going out of her way -- and spending more than she could probably afford -- to try to do something nice for her brother only to be stomped on. RUDE!!
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Old 09-23-2018, 05:48 AM
 
31,984 posts, read 17,265,872 times
Reputation: 34701
Quote:
Originally Posted by PriscillaVanilla View Post
No. But when people give us concert tickets, theater tickets, restaurant gift cards - we just don't use them. We can't. We can't take our kids to those places, they're too young, and it would cost a lot to hire a sitter for three kids.
Ever hear of take-out?

The big brother in the OP's scenario sounds like a big turd. Ask him if he wants fries with that sitter.
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Old 09-23-2018, 09:18 AM
 
Location: here
24,469 posts, read 28,730,432 times
Reputation: 31039
Quote:
Originally Posted by PriscillaVanilla View Post
No. But when people give us concert tickets, theater tickets, restaurant gift cards - we just don't use them. We can't. We can't take our kids to those places, they're too young, and it would cost a lot to hire a sitter for three kids.
Alone time with your husband is important. Maybe you could trade off babysitting with another couple.
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Old 09-23-2018, 09:26 AM
 
Location: Denver area
21,134 posts, read 22,107,592 times
Reputation: 35503
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kibbiekat View Post
Alone time with your husband is important. Maybe you could trade off babysitting with another couple.
That was going to be my response as well. We did this at times.
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Old 09-23-2018, 02:26 PM
 
Location: Ft. Myers
15,574 posts, read 9,650,106 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626 View Post
If you give a gift such as concert tickets, to a couple, are you also expected to pay for their babysitter so they can attend the concert? This situation recently came up with some younger friends and I am curious about what other people think.

A college student that I know splurged to give her older brother and his wife (who both have full time jobs) two tickets to a concert that he wanted to attended. Normally she would give a small gift, or a home made gift, to her brother for his birthday but spent at least four times what she would normally spent on his gift to buy two concert tickets. And, while he was (mostly) appreciative of the gift, he informed her that "it was not polite to buy tickets for a night out unless you also include enough money to pay for a babysitter."

Frankly, I had never heard of an etiquette rule like that. So, was she in the wrong or was he just making that up or is this something new or what?

Thank you for any input.

Oops, maybe this should be in Non-romantic relationships instead, but I was wondering what people who needed to pay for baby sitters (parents) thought about this issue.

I only have one question. WHAT !!!!!!!!!

That would be the last time I give that guy ANYTHING, even the time of day.
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Old 09-23-2018, 02:51 PM
 
Location: State of Denial
1,664 posts, read 770,645 times
Reputation: 8531
I think next year the brother deserves a two-for-a-dollar greeting card from Dollar Tree. Except he'd probably expect her to come over and open it for him.
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Old 09-23-2018, 04:55 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
16,471 posts, read 15,913,707 times
Reputation: 38735
Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626 View Post
Thank you everyone for your responses. I also had never heard of anyone expecting that you also pay for the babysitter when you give a gift like that.

It was really out of character for the older brother to act like that. I wondered if he meant it as a joke and sent it via text/email and his sister misunderstood and took it seriously. If that is the case then the joke is on him as she never gave him another expensive birthday gift in the following years.

Another possibility is he had gotten used to his wife's wealthy parents giving them tickets to things and then offering to babysit (obviously for free to spend time with their grandchild) or maybe paying for a babysitter. I really don't know if they did that but I could easily picture it happening. But, something that your wealthy in-laws may (or may not do) is completely different from expecting your broke college student little sister to do it.

It really is not a big deal, but it came up in conversation recently and I wanted to get other opinions on it. I think that it was probably meant as a joke but the sister really thought (both then and now) that he meant it seriously.

Thanks.
Thank you everyone. I am glad that (almost) everyone else though it was as crazy as I did.

I am still thinking that he meant it as a joke (sent via text or email) and the joke fell flat. Very flat.

Mods, feel free to close this thread.
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Old 09-23-2018, 05:24 PM
 
Location: Dallas TX
14,294 posts, read 20,544,645 times
Reputation: 20159
I would have responded with ďokay then, Iíll keep the tickets for myself.Ē Thatís the most ridiculous statement I have ever heard.
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