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Old 11-12-2018, 10:23 AM
 
Location: Loudon, TN
5,115 posts, read 4,389,752 times
Reputation: 17114

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Neglecting to tell someone you love (son, brother, friend, sister, whomever) that they are being lied to is the same as lying to them. Hiding the truth is lying.

If I found out that a friend or family member knew I was being cheated on and failed to relay that info to me, I would be furious with them. I'd consider their silence in the matter to be almost as bad as the behavior of the cheater, maybe even worse, because they are a loved one who should be willing to protect and defend me, not lie to my face.
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Old 11-12-2018, 01:43 PM
 
7,216 posts, read 4,706,508 times
Reputation: 8162
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheShadow View Post
Neglecting to tell someone you love (son, brother, friend, sister, whomever) that they are being lied to is the same as lying to them. Hiding the truth is lying.

If I found out that a friend or family member knew I was being cheated on and failed to relay that info to me, I would be furious with them. I'd consider their silence in the matter to be almost as bad as the behavior of the cheater, maybe even worse, because they are a loved one who should be willing to protect and defend me, not lie to my face.
Agree. I would tell them and allow them to work it out from there.
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Old 11-12-2018, 08:02 PM
 
11,465 posts, read 6,853,851 times
Reputation: 21009
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pogue Mahone View Post
This is why sons need their fathers. Mothers let their sons get cheated on for 4 months without telling them, and talk to the person cheating on them instead of going directly to the son. Fathers aren't going to leave their sons out to dry like that.
No. Mothers do not let there sons get cheated on for 4 months. The OP did, but she does not represent all mothers. I would not have waited to tell, they would deserve to know.

Just as I would tell a sibling, friend, or anyone else I was close with if I knew they were in a relationship with a cheater.
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Old 11-12-2018, 08:39 PM
 
Location: Sacramento
72 posts, read 23,647 times
Reputation: 38
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sundaydrive00 View Post
No. Mothers do not let there sons get cheated on for 4 months. The OP did, but she does not represent all mothers. I would not have waited to tell, they would deserve to know.

Just as I would tell a sibling, friend, or anyone else I was close with if I knew they were in a relationship with a cheater.
So threads over now.
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Old 11-13-2018, 06:23 AM
Status: "Was it for this my life I sought?" (set 4 days ago)
 
Location: Posting from my space yacht.
7,097 posts, read 2,710,401 times
Reputation: 13103
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sundaydrive00 View Post
No. Mothers do not let there sons get cheated on for 4 months. The OP did, but she does not represent all mothers. I would not have waited to tell, they would deserve to know.

Just as I would tell a sibling, friend, or anyone else I was close with if I knew they were in a relationship with a cheater.
Plenty of mothers advised the OP not to tell him on this thread. Not all, but more than a few. Perhaps they are more able to see it from the cheating girlfriend's perspective or can't empathize entirely with the son's perspective. Either way no father worth his salt is going to let his son be played the fool like that without at least letting him know what's up.
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Old 11-13-2018, 02:20 PM
 
Location: El Pueblo de Nuestra Señora la Reina de los Ángeles del Río Porciúncula
14,513 posts, read 14,551,012 times
Reputation: 10264
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pogue Mahone View Post
This is why sons need their fathers. Mothers let their sons get cheated on for 4 months without telling them, and talk to the person cheating on them instead of going directly to the son. Fathers aren't going to leave their sons out to dry like that.
Now that the point has been brought up, not that I ever would get in this situation, but I feel that if I did and my dad found out I bet he would tell me, and i bet if my mom found out she'd whisper to my dad and get him to deliver the bad news and then console me.

That's what happens in traditional nuclear families working on the old model ('50s, SAHM, etc.). What we have now is lots of single parents. Many of those children are missing a parent.
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Old 11-13-2018, 03:49 PM
 
1,043 posts, read 702,549 times
Reputation: 3704
I'm a mom and if my son's girlfriend was cheating on him, yes I would tell him even if it makes him mad.. I would rather he be mad at me for a little while then risk him getting std or accused of a pregnancy that may not be by him.
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Old Today, 03:51 PM
 
Location: In my skin
9,005 posts, read 14,006,384 times
Reputation: 8792
I'd ask him what his expectations are of her. Are they in a monogamous relationship? If so, tell him. If not, no biggie.
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