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Old 11-08-2018, 08:05 PM
 
Location: Tijuana Exurbs
3,907 posts, read 10,202,484 times
Reputation: 4422

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This is second hand, but a co-worker told us the story of how she was waiting in line at the store, and her 3 year old boy was dancing around while holding his crotch.

She asked him, "Do you need to go to the bathroom?"

His reply was "no", but the antics continued.

She asked again, and again he responded "no".

Finally she asked a third time, and he replied with a exasperated and very loud, "No! I'm just playing with myself."

She was mortified.
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Old 11-08-2018, 10:20 PM
 
15,483 posts, read 17,154,794 times
Reputation: 15180
My cousin when she was 3 went on a trip to NY City with her mom. She lived in a small town with no black people. There was a black man in front of them and she embarrassed her mom by saying "Look, mom, there's a chocolate man." Luckily, the man thought that was cute and funny and struck up a short conversation with them.
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Old 11-09-2018, 05:31 AM
 
Location: Wilmington, NC
1,438 posts, read 260,917 times
Reputation: 2439
Also second hand:

A mother parks her kid at a table at McDonalds and goes back to the counter to get their food.

As she's returning, the kid yells, "Here comes my mom with her great big vagina!"
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Old 11-09-2018, 07:26 AM
 
5,164 posts, read 2,330,360 times
Reputation: 13160
My granddaughter is in kindergarten and learning to pronounce words (read) ,to make a clear sentence. She loves to read billboards and signs. I cheer her on most times. One day we are driving slow as she wants to read the signs. We get to one and she sounds it out and says ' mimi, that sign makes no sense! I said...ohh what did you read? She says 'please don't drive in pears'. I was dumbfounded and said..let me go back and read the sign...it said " please don't drive impaired". I laughed.

My oldest boy when he was three thrived on reading comic books. He loved reading snoopy and the pnut gang. One evening my husband and I are laying in bed and hear our son just giggling . I stop over to his room and he says...ohh mom this is so funny! I said ohh what are you reading.. he says: "ohh snoopy you can't 'DENNY'
it. " I was again quizzical and asked if I could see the page. I read it and said, honey the word is deny. So now when any of us are debating things at our family gathering...someone will chime in...Hey ! Don't DENNY it!
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Old 11-09-2018, 09:26 AM
 
Location: Wilmington, NC
1,438 posts, read 260,917 times
Reputation: 2439
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nov3 View Post
My granddaughter is in kindergarten and learning to pronounce words (read) ,to make a clear sentence. She loves to read billboards and signs. I cheer her on most times. One day we are driving slow as she wants to read the signs. We get to one and she sounds it out and says ' mimi, that sign makes no sense! I said...ohh what did you read? She says 'please don't drive in pears'. I was dumbfounded and said..let me go back and read the sign...it said " please don't drive impaired". I laughed.

My oldest boy when he was three thrived on reading comic books. He loved reading snoopy and the pnut gang. One evening my husband and I are laying in bed and hear our son just giggling . I stop over to his room and he says...ohh mom this is so funny! I said ohh what are you reading.. he says: "ohh snoopy you can't 'DENNY'
it. " I was again quizzical and asked if I could see the page. I read it and said, honey the word is deny. So now when any of us are debating things at our family gathering...someone will chime in...Hey ! Don't DENNY it!
This is so funny!

I heard somewhere once that one of the hardest codes to crack is a family code - those sayings and shortcuts that no one would ever understand unless you had it handed down to you through family lore. We have a bunch of those too - they always make everybody laugh!
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Old 11-09-2018, 11:37 AM
 
Location: N of citrus, S of decent corn
35,453 posts, read 43,641,424 times
Reputation: 58800
Quote:
Originally Posted by CarolinaMoon1 View Post
This is so funny!

I heard somewhere once that one of the hardest codes to crack is a family code - those sayings and shortcuts that no one would ever understand unless you had it handed down to you through family lore. We have a bunch of those too - they always make everybody laugh!
So true. One of ours is, “Him won car!” Meaning something that is very exciting. My son was about 3, watching a game show and was hopping up and down with excitement when the contestant won a car.

Sometimes I still call my daughter Tistopher (her name is Kris) because her little friend couldn’t remember her name, so called her Tistopher.
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Old 11-09-2018, 11:40 AM
 
Location: Florida -
8,454 posts, read 10,252,866 times
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We were driving to Miami many years ago and talking about what we were going to do in Miami. My young daughter piped-up, "When we get to 'YOUR'ami,' can we go to the beach?"
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Old 11-09-2018, 01:48 PM
 
Location: NY>FL>VA>NC>IN
2,188 posts, read 822,949 times
Reputation: 4548
Quote:
Originally Posted by CarolinaMoon1 View Post
Also second hand:

A mother parks her kid at a table at McDonalds and goes back to the counter to get their food.

As she's returning, the kid yells, "Here comes my mom with her great big vagina!"
Please help me to understand why a child would say this? In any context? Reading it made me a tad nauseous.
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Old 11-09-2018, 02:06 PM
 
Location: Northern panhandle WV
2,611 posts, read 1,889,251 times
Reputation: 5445
Both my sister and I had incidents from childhood. When my sister was little parents took her to a movie in new Technicolor. after it started she started crying and yelled out I don't like those Colored People! Mom had to take her out.

with me when I was little, my maiden name is Howard. One day in church they said the Lord's Prayer and I misheard Hallowed by they name and said loudly hey mommy God has the same last name as us!
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Old 11-09-2018, 02:10 PM
 
Location: Northern panhandle WV
2,611 posts, read 1,889,251 times
Reputation: 5445
Quote:
Originally Posted by gentlearts View Post
So true. One of ours is, “Him won car!” Meaning something that is very exciting. My son was about 3, watching a game show and was hopping up and down with excitement when the contestant won a car.

Sometimes I still call my daughter Tistopher (her name is Kris) because her little friend couldn’t remember her name, so called her Tistopher.
I have a son named Kristofer but when he was small he could not say it and it came out Kiffer, and so he was Kiffer till he was all grown up.
When my oldest son was little he would here me calling my mom Mother and so he called her Mona which was his version of Mother, she became Mona for the rest of her life to everyone.
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