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Old 01-02-2019, 06:38 PM
 
Location: Saint John, IN
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My question is......does he get good grades? Does he have a part-time job? Is he usually a good kid? Does he normally get up on time for school when it's in session? If so, then I don't see this as being a big deal. Give him a little slack and let him stay up later during break and play games. If the answer to those are NO then I would say lights out, games off.
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Old 01-03-2019, 10:14 AM
 
Location: New Jersey
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My biggest concern would be what he's playing and who he's playing with. My husband and I are gamers (not as much anymore now that we have a 15 month old) and we play a lot of first person shooter games that have age restrictions. We tend not to talk in game, but many people who do tend to be kids - mainly teens - who should not be allowed to play in the first place. They are on mostly around the holidays since they aren't in school & are allowed to stay up late. Man are they annoying. Many people worry about these kids playing violent video games. We report them all of the time.


I played a lot of Sega growing up. I don't remember playing ALL the time -I loved TV more back then. I spent a lot of time online chatting with people - mostly just chit chatting - I loved talking to people from around the world. There were a lot of sketchy pervs but I knew better and just blocked them. My parents were not fans of that but in the end they trusted me. We did keep the computer in the living room...so that's probably why.


I suggest making him find a part time job. The second I turned 16 my mother made me get one. I worked at a deli, often first thing in the morning while on break, so I was in bed early and boy was I tired. It taught me responsibility and helps build character.
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Old 01-03-2019, 11:11 AM
 
Location: Massachusetts
9,006 posts, read 9,320,574 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jrsydevil82 View Post
we play a lot of first person shooter games that have age restrictions. We tend not to talk in game, but many people who do tend to be kids - mainly teens - who should not be allowed to play in the first place. They are on mostly around the holidays since they aren't in school & are allowed to stay up late. Man are they annoying. Many people worry about these kids playing violent video games. We report them all of the time.
First thing I do is mute everyone when I join a game. Most of the most vile, filthy, racist language I hear when playing FPS's comes from teens and (what sounds like) pre-teens.
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Old 01-03-2019, 02:50 PM
 
Location: Chicago
274 posts, read 65,979 times
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My kids are still young (10 & 8) but i cant say i would allow them to stay up that late playing video games while living in my house. I always noticed that the longer my son played the more aggressive he would be towards his sister so i capped him at one hour a day on school days. During weekends and school holidays they can earn gaming time by reading. 20 mins of reading buys them an hour of gaming. But that's just my household, they get free rein at their grandparents and their dad also has different rules. I have always been consistent with my parenting so i rarely get push back. I expect it to change as they get older and i'm open to negotiating but at the end of the day, its my house, so its my rules.
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Old 01-04-2019, 12:53 PM
 
Location: New Jersey
1,797 posts, read 2,276,704 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BostonMike7 View Post
First thing I do is mute everyone when I join a game. Most of the most vile, filthy, racist language I hear when playing FPS's comes from teens and (what sounds like) pre-teens.
Yes, they are terrible. I started muting games too. Lately it seems they have started doing it in text as well.
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Old 01-04-2019, 02:52 PM
 
Location: Central Florida
3,237 posts, read 1,657,148 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by txtqueen View Post
On weekends and vacation it shouldn’t matter.
I would let him.
Plus he’s 17 in a few months it won’t matter anyways and he’ll be setting his limits.
Not necessarily. My rules, my house. I love how people think once you turn 18 you can do whatever you want. In your own place, yes. Under my roof, no. This is why when I turned 18 I moved out. I didn't like the rules and I was off and running.
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Old 01-05-2019, 01:44 PM
 
Location: Wherever life takes me.
6,108 posts, read 6,488,653 times
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Originally Posted by budlight View Post
Not necessarily. My rules, my house. I love how people think once you turn 18 you can do whatever you want. In your own place, yes. Under my roof, no. This is why when I turned 18 I moved out. I didn't like the rules and I was off and running.
I worked a job and I went to school when I lived at home from 18-21 and I was going to be damned if someone was going to tell me what to do and how to relax after a long day of school and work. It didn’t matter where I lived.

That’s part of why I started coming here. My mother wanted me to “act like an adult” but she didn’t want to treat me like one so there I was 18-21 busting my ass busy all day bored out of my mind at school and work and then I come home to someone whining about everything and wanting to treat me like I was 12.

After an 8 hour shift standing on my feet all day I didn’t want to hear someone trying to treat me like I was 12, 12 year old don’t have jobs, don’t work long shifts, don’t have adult concerns, they don’t pay bills.

I paid for my cell phone, I paid for my car insurance, I paid for my gas, I paid for my clothes, my food, my make up, I paid for all my expenses.

She let me continue to live at home for free and even if I had left she’d still have been in that house with the same amount of rent. She didn’t pay for anything.

She thought she could tell me I could or couldn’t date, she tried to tell me what time I had to be asleep by, I was 19 and she’d scream at me for being up late doing my homework even though I never had a class earlier than 11am. Then she’d blame me for waking up my brother even if she had just taken her crazy butt to bed and stopped all the whining she’d never have woken up her other kid.

You want them to act like adults at that age then stop treating them like they’re still preteens.
Cut the umbilical cord. Seriously.
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Old 01-05-2019, 01:47 PM
 
Location: Wherever life takes me.
6,108 posts, read 6,488,653 times
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After a certain point it got to be like did she want me to work hard and become a successful adult or did she just want to argue?

Because I wasn’t going to let go.
I wasn’t go to go to work, pay my bills and then be told I can’t go out with my friends.
Ok then if I can’t go out then pay my bills again. Simple.
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Old 01-05-2019, 01:53 PM
 
Location: Wherever life takes me.
6,108 posts, read 6,488,653 times
Reputation: 3088
Quote:
Originally Posted by budlight View Post
Not necessarily. My rules, my house. I love how people think once you turn 18 you can do whatever you want. In your own place, yes. Under my roof, no. This is why when I turned 18 I moved out. I didn't like the rules and I was off and running.
My mother tried to tell me I wasn’t allowed to spend the night at boys places when I was 20/21.
What was I supposed to do? Not date at all?

I ended up lying about where I stayed the night and luckily there weren’t all those tracking apps.

My current boyfriend and I wouldn’t even be together had I obeyed her rules.

I’d still be single, living with her and probably 200lbs if I obeyed her rules.
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Old Today, 11:57 AM
 
Location: Central Florida
3,237 posts, read 1,657,148 times
Reputation: 10782
Quote:
Originally Posted by txtqueen View Post
My mother tried to tell me I wasn’t allowed to spend the night at boys places when I was 20/21.
What was I supposed to do? Not date at all?

I ended up lying about where I stayed the night and luckily there weren’t all those tracking apps.

My current boyfriend and I wouldn’t even be together had I obeyed her rules.

I’d still be single, living with her and probably 200lbs if I obeyed her rules.
Did it occur to you to move out?
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