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Old Yesterday, 08:16 PM
 
891 posts, read 240,004 times
Reputation: 1349

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Thanks.

Rocko 20, I have a job--and a career. We all have plenty of money (although my father won't let my mother use some of their ample money for her own charity). I don't need the cost of the rental car, but it's the principle of being stiffed in this situation that grates.

CatzPaw, I will stop providing them with tickets. I also had given my parents a Christmas present--a promise to renew their Amazon Prime membership. The expiration date is in January and they got upset when I gave them the renewal last time, in December, which was too early, so I had told them that I'd handle it right in January at the expiration date. I wonder how they'd like it if the cost of their Prime membership was donated to charity.

Airlines are smart and I follow rules, so if the airline says that you can't use miles to book a ticket and get reimbursed, end of story.
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Old Yesterday, 09:59 PM
 
Location: USA
2,471 posts, read 1,853,621 times
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hmm...I'm confused...reading the title, I thought it meant if they were young... I think being cheap your kids while they're growing up but yet being generous with others may do more harm than good.... idk....
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Old Today, 12:36 AM
 
605 posts, read 136,776 times
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Everyone being adults should do as they want with their money. Buy tickets, don't buy tickets. If you were supposed to be paid back for half the rental car it was wrong that you got stiffed. Next time get your half up front. Or, suggest that as everyone is an adult that the gift giving could stop entirely. Say you are short of funds if you want. You know, 'cause you gave too much to the stop nail fungus society. ;-)
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Old Today, 12:54 AM
 
11,404 posts, read 6,828,263 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rocko20 View Post
Well, I received $40 from my mother one time as a birthday present so I know all about cheap parents.
How much are parents supposed to give their adult children for their birthday? My mom typically gives me a $50 restaurant gift card for my birthday, and gives my SO something similar. I've always considered it to be a generous amount for a birthday gift.
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Old Today, 12:57 AM
 
11,404 posts, read 6,828,263 times
Reputation: 20845
Quote:
Originally Posted by PuppiesandKittens View Post
Airlines are smart and I follow rules, so if the airline says that you can't use miles to book a ticket and get reimbursed, end of story.
The airlines are not going to know or even care if your parents give you $500 (or whatever) shortly after you've bought airline tickets. You really think they monitor your bank account?
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Old Today, 05:13 AM
 
Location: Where the sun likes to shine!!
20,493 posts, read 25,762,007 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PuppiesandKittens View Post

This time, as you were short of funds to make the charitable contributions that you had committed to give that year, you told your adult child that you'd give him a normal birthday present, but you also told your adult child that as "surely you'd [the adult child] want to help others, instead of giving you a larger present or paying 1/2 of the rental car", you had decided to give that cash to a charity that you picked.

So your adult child booked a ticket for you and paid for half a rental car, and you returned the favor by giving money to a charity that you had committed to, and which your child doesn't like (which your child had told you).

The adult child didn't say anything and didn't dispute it.


Cool?
And they surely don't need a first class ticket.

Not cool what they did. People need to do what they say they will.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Rocko20 View Post
Well, I received $40 from my mother one time as a birthday present so I know all about cheap parents. My father was cheap, and my step father was also cheap. Was it because they were poor, broke, or stingy? Who knows.
Why is that cheap? No one "deserves" a present. You got one...you should be happy.
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Old Today, 05:22 AM
 
1,046 posts, read 1,730,827 times
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You and your family sound petty and passive aggressive. And for people heavily involved in a church...

Next trip, sit down and discuss expenses in advance. Get payment upfront or have them handle some of the expenses themselves, splitting different aspects of the trip. Or stop traveling together. Or make all the arrangements yourself and cancel if payment not received by a certain date.

Do you even like them?
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Old Today, 05:54 AM
 
891 posts, read 240,004 times
Reputation: 1349
Quote:
Originally Posted by reebo View Post
You and your family sound petty and passive aggressive. And for people heavily involved in a church...

Next trip, sit down and discuss expenses in advance. Get payment upfront or have them handle some of the expenses themselves, splitting different aspects of the trip. Or stop traveling together. Or make all the arrangements yourself and cancel if payment not received by a certain date.

Do you even like them?
Only some of us are involved in churches. Others are, I think, atheist or agnostic.

If I weren't involved in a church, I'd be a lot worse than I am. (This should not be taken as saying that people who aren't involved in churches are worse than people outside of churches; it simply means that in my case, my church involvement has helped "fix" some of my worst personality traits; this statement applies only to me.)

I am not too wild about some of my relatives. I'm sure that the sentiment is mutual.

For the other posters saying, "how would the airline know if you used miles to book a ticket and were paid for it": my parents would likely just go up to a ticket agent and tell him or her that it was done that way, but even if not, I am not up for breaking even small rules; it's just easier to follow all of them, consequences or not.

Last edited by PuppiesandKittens; Today at 06:35 AM..
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Old Today, 08:06 AM
 
2,022 posts, read 1,372,928 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PuppiesandKittens View Post
Parents, would you act like this with your adult children?......


Cool?

Well.... yes and no.

If your giving is selfless and from the heart, expecting nothing in return because you give from love, then.... NO. It's not cool...... to retaliate (yes, retaliate) against your own parents or siblings or offspring because they "didn't give me enough" to "match my "gift"... (and that's using the term loosely).

After all... is this a business transaction or a gesture of affection? If this is a business transaction, you need to codify the rules and make them non-optional. We WILL split the rental car.... every time. Stuff like that.


But, if your giving is all for show and based on the same rules as a business transaction and you put each other on the same level as some Joe that does your lawn care or cooks you a meal, then YES..... it's cool. UNLESS - you codify the rules otherwise beforehand.

Business is business.

Last edited by Led Zeppelin; Today at 08:15 AM..
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Old Today, 09:31 AM
 
Location: Bloomington IN
6,059 posts, read 7,278,888 times
Reputation: 14585
When I give someone a gift I expect nothing in return. Were the tickets a gift or was there an unspoken expectation of payment? That's where the whole thing goes off the rails.

What organizations others give to are none of my business. I'm sure my parents give to organizations I don't support just as I"m sure I give to organizations they do not support.
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