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Old 01-12-2019, 01:08 AM
 
10,766 posts, read 7,837,917 times
Reputation: 19164

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If I was her and I knew I never wanted kids I'd get my tubes tied. Nip that crap right in the bud.
She's smart. Maybe suggest counseling. He doesn't sound like the guy for her.
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Old 01-12-2019, 10:05 AM
 
Location: State of Transition
74,846 posts, read 66,528,980 times
Reputation: 71562
OP, I didn't get very far in the narrative. My immediate question was: why is she still with him? If he's been pressuring her for years, clearly they're not on the same page. They're not a good match.

If she's been confiding in you about all this, have you not said to her, that they're not a good match, and that she should look for someone who supports her educational and career goals? If not, why not?

Oh, and that doesn't even begin to raise the question: why is he pressuring her to have a child, without proposing to her, first? Why are YOU ok with him pressuring her to have a child out of wedlock? Sorry, but this story isn't making much sense to me.
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Old Today, 08:21 PM
 
Location: SC
20 posts, read 383 times
Reputation: 24
I'm in the opposite position. My 18-year-old is pregnant and happy about it. I am not. I WISH I had a daughter that waited and is a critical thinker such as your. The fact that you guys have such a great relationship that she told you, is wonderful. Encourage her to keep thinking critically and not to let anyone pressure her. It sounds like you did a good job mom
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Old Today, 09:49 PM
 
Location: California
30,005 posts, read 32,537,501 times
Reputation: 25393
No marriage, no baby. It's that simple. Hopefully your daughter has a spine and a good head on her shoulders. The first decision will be whether this is the guy she wants to spend the rest of her life with. Then whether she want kids now or in the future. Finally whether she thinks he will make a good dad. In that order.
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