U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 01-21-2019, 05:43 PM
 
7,558 posts, read 3,136,389 times
Reputation: 10467

Advertisements

Downsize. Making sure they don’t get any ideas.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 01-21-2019, 05:47 PM
 
Location: 500 miles from home
28,704 posts, read 15,765,546 times
Reputation: 21603
Quote:
Originally Posted by wilsonthedog View Post
Ha ha

I thought "celebrate" was going to be the thing, buy a boat, maybe a condo, travel more with the Mrs. but I have seen so much of the world with the kiddos over the years. The big stuff anyway; London, Paris, All of Ireland, cruises, DC, NYC, Cali, Italy, I don't have a huge list of places I want to go anymore.

We didn't really do without anything unless just needing more and bigger stuff is a thing..........summer vacations yearly, we had a few nice cars before just keeping the paid off ones to make sure they could attend wherever/whatever college they were accepted too, home is new and nice, emergency fund check, retirement check, by all measures we were never waiting for them to grow up so we could "live".

We volunteer, workout, have animals, I'm sure I will figure out something probably volunteer in Haiti or some other 3rd world nation. It is crazy because I knew it would be hard and was 100% mindful it would be and it's still hard.

I'm like now what?

Celebrate I'm sure I will get there.....feel like I lost my partner in crime as each one has flown off. Thank gosh we are all close still. (1 left at home)

Thanks for the input all!!
Well, let's be honest. It's hard when the nest is empty. (At first).


I only had one but for 18 years - raising a child was my life. Certainly not just one chapter in my book but much, much more.


I really I thought I would die when he went to college 6 hours away as a freshman. I tried to keep really busy the first few months; barely giving myself time to think or breathe. The summer before he left for school, I would cry at the drop of a hat just thinking about it.


But, after a year or two of having an empty nest; I really enjoy the fact that my time is my OWN. I still work and no longer need to fill up every hour with busyness just to get by.


NOW, he's in grad school halfway across the country. I had to make peace with that as well.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-21-2019, 05:48 PM
 
5,134 posts, read 2,047,655 times
Reputation: 5350
I took a lot of time to improve my skillsets and marketability in the job market. Studied a lot of different things and played around a little. The ex did nothing and had little motivation to do anything aside from going to the mall.

That's why she's the ex.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-21-2019, 07:29 PM
 
1,069 posts, read 717,178 times
Reputation: 3806
It wasn't easy at first and was a bit of sadness , but it's a good sign that we raised our children to grow up in to adults who are independent and pursuing their goals.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-21-2019, 07:48 PM
 
Location: Winterpeg
740 posts, read 270,330 times
Reputation: 3107
I thoroughly enjoyed our two years of empty-nesting. Then the kid boomeranged on us. I’m looking forward to her graduation from university in April for more than one reason! As the kid got to the upper grades in high school we started transitioning to being less involved. So when she left the only real difference we had was way lower grocery bills (no more parade of friends cruising through), and I was able to set up a hobby room for myself in her now empty bedroom.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tominftl View Post
Downsize. Making sure they don’t get any ideas.
My parents did this, first to a smaller house, but I still came back. Then they got a small condo and I was SOL. haha
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-21-2019, 08:19 PM
 
2,923 posts, read 1,281,068 times
Reputation: 11259
We started a new adventure ,new habits and traditions, and I devoted myself to my art and community art projects, volunteering. It wasn’t easy but we kept busy and my kids enjoyed seeing what we were up to and they enjoyed sharing what they were up to.

It is a strange feeling to shape your life around your children and needs and be a mother and then boom. Took a while to get used to the new dynamics .
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-21-2019, 08:27 PM
Status: "ORION" (set 2 days ago)
 
232 posts, read 41,288 times
Reputation: 150
I am gonna throw a party and then hit the road in an RV! Wife can come if she wants LOL....I am counting down the days believe me.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-21-2019, 08:38 PM
 
Location: Middle of the ocean
29,361 posts, read 18,610,351 times
Reputation: 42354
Quote:
Originally Posted by FarRight View Post
I am gonna throw a party and then hit the road in an RV! Wife can come if she wants LOL....I am counting down the days believe me.
We are probably doing that too, we are on the fence on whether to also buy a small house or not.

We can outrun the kids if our house has wheels.

(I am mostly kidding.)
__________________
____________________________________________
My posts as a Mod will always be in red.
Be sure to review Terms of Service: TOS
And check this out: FAQ
Moderator: Relationships Forum / Hawaii Forum / Dogs
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-22-2019, 06:20 AM
 
Location: Florida
4,827 posts, read 3,328,367 times
Reputation: 9505
I’m not there yet. The kids are 18 and almost 16. The past few years, though, I’ve been devoting more time to my career and to a time-intensive volunteer position. I’ve seen a few friends kind of lose it as their kids started flying away and one thing they had in common was that they didn’t really have anything other their kids to occupy them mentally and physically. My husband and I have also been more intentional about our relationship... I’ve seen lots of divorces among friends whose kids are in their teens and beyond. It seems to be a trend.

I don’t yet know if my plans will alleviate some of the difficulty of the early empty nesting years... I will find out soon enough.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-22-2019, 06:40 AM
 
464 posts, read 205,320 times
Reputation: 1872
We exchanged our horse trailer for a travel trailer and started doing things just for us.

I guess I wasn't very maternal as even with two normal, high-achieving kids I found the years filled with teenage drama very stressful.

Was glad not to have to go through another Homecoming, prom night or beach week with my kids. They were popular and very social in high school while my husband and I were high school nerds which made it difficult to relate to some of their concerns.

A friend told me that the worry eased up once they were away at college as they would be living their own lives at that point and she was right. Also my kids, like most around here, stayed on and worked in their college towns after their sophomore year so at that point they were on their own----except for the financial aspect.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top