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Old Today, 02:56 PM
 
Location: SC
20 posts, read 383 times
Reputation: 24

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I understand and appreciate everybody response. I was raised to believe that you never turn your back on family, especially your mom. I can remember thinking that my mom was the enemy when I was a teen, but thank God I realized that she was not. I realized that she was really the only person on earth, that ever really truly loved me unconditionally and that the rest of these humans on this earth could never stand a candle to the love I received from her. No one. So to have a child be so disloyal is heartbreaking. I left out the part about the BF mom who both of them have brainwashed my daughter and turned her against me. I have a son 5 years older than my daughter and thank God he gets it. I just don't see how my daughter could have any good luck behind her behavior, I can assure you, that when I did it to my mom, I had the worst. My mom says that this is a test and I have to wait to see the outcome. I'm just heartbroken yall, I just didn't think I'd be here. This hurts so bad, that I am asking God for mercy
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Old Today, 03:15 PM
 
857 posts, read 454,608 times
Reputation: 845
Congratulations for your grandchild.

Sorry for your situation.
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Old Today, 03:42 PM
 
13,781 posts, read 12,612,557 times
Reputation: 18724
If it helps, her going to the military would most likely not have changed anything...
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Old Today, 04:07 PM
 
Location: SC
20 posts, read 383 times
Reputation: 24
I would have preferred her to have gone in the military first only because it is what she said she wanted, but you right, that would not have changed anything. More upset with her treating me like I am the enemy, and being disrespectful and not loyal Kids make mistakes, but damn she is being strong and wrong. This kid was my world. I thought I was raising a smart, responsible kid. Not one that would turn on me for a boy and a strange family that couldn't possibly love her as much as I and mine do. She has completely turned away from everything I taught her
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Old Today, 04:33 PM
 
7,911 posts, read 3,111,002 times
Reputation: 20722
Is her dad in the picture?
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Old Today, 04:35 PM
 
5,292 posts, read 2,385,423 times
Reputation: 13509
As someone who was a wayward daughter...thank you for reminding me Why I left and chose the path I did. Ohhh ...mind you I was all but 17 when my son arrived in this world. My Mom had to HOLD tongue for 3 years til I came back a mature lady. It hurt her terribly....and I was hurt terribly by things that were said ...similar to how you conveyed. Yes I've zero doubt that your daughter will at some point wish to mend fences.....Have your humble pie ready in the oven. Simmer those emotions and learn to ask those questions of yourself more objectively...How LOVING is it to judge your daughter and her decisions? How are you modeling respect at this time? Just simmer on that and get that some clear perspective before putting into actions any further remarks towards her. Mothers and Daughters have a special bond....of that I can attest. You both are two peas in a pod...each asserting your life standards on the other.....
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Old Today, 06:49 PM
 
743 posts, read 1,020,749 times
Reputation: 861
You think she disrespected you. Do you think you disrespected her?
How does your husband feel about the situation?
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Old Today, 07:25 PM
 
Location: SC
20 posts, read 383 times
Reputation: 24
Yes her dad is here. We have been divorced since she was 6 months. He has not been a hands-on dad. Just a dad in my opinion that has done the bare minimum. He is the type of dad that believe that his kids should reach out for him, instead of it being his responsibility to reach out to them. Whereas I was the mom who took on the responsibility that it's my job to make sure they were str8, because they didn't ask to come here.

Have I been disrespectful to her, yes with some of my comments? Comments like she is slow, she is not using critical thinking. Could I have been softer, yes, but then again you guys don't know the full story and truth be told, I know my daughter planned this pregnancy because she caught the BF cheating and a week later, I found a pregnancy test and confronted her on it. It's a lot and I am in this space that I was not prepared for and I hope I can feel better and not so broken
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Old Today, 08:10 PM
 
1,057 posts, read 711,260 times
Reputation: 3740
I'm so sorry chawkins, I don't blame you for being upset and hurt. I would suggest talking to your pastor if you have one and/or counselor to help you sort and control your emotions.

Tell your daughter even though you may not always agree with her, you still love her with your whole heart. She is going to have your grandchild and if this family is as wacky as you say they are she is definitely going to need to know your door is always open to her.

It sounds like the bf parents are more of wanting to be cool and be friends , then actually parent. I know a few.
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Old Today, 08:32 PM
 
Location: SC
20 posts, read 383 times
Reputation: 24
Thank you,

Yes, I may seek counseling. This forum has helped a lot. I appreciate everyone comments. I've not had to deal with this much emotional pain in a years. I guess I am lucky and it makes me more sympathetic to others pain. My words to people are much kinder and softer. We all need it in this world. Thank you all
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