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Old 02-09-2019, 11:31 PM
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Guidance, consistency and some moments of firm directives. Yup, More the friend style parent.
The moment they were born they carried every right I did. So why treat them less then or not equal too.
Sure they deserved protection and some moments of standards to be accorded.

My Husband would say,,,, you are being too lenient. In which I'd say Tis better to go with the wind then fight it. Both boys had what worked in guiding them. I'm sure though my sons would tell a different tale. They both often share some "moments" that did question my parenting style.....
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Old 02-10-2019, 06:26 AM
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It sounds like you are a good parent. A good parent has boundaries and teaches their children how to identify their own boundaries. That is only half the battle. How you communicate those boundaries and enforce them is equally important and contains skills that need to be taught.

I don't have rules such as not speaking unless you have something nice to say.
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Old 02-10-2019, 09:14 AM
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I think a parent plays many roles in a child's life. There are times to be an authority figure. There are times to be a friend. There are times to be a consoler. There are times to be a teacher. You need to be all of these things when you are raising your children. You cannot simply pick one.
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Old 02-10-2019, 04:52 PM
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I ruled the roost when they were younger, I’m friends with them now.
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Old Today, 11:28 AM
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Originally Posted by DubbleT View Post
This is pretty much how I approached it, except for the last bit maybe. I don't think I actually waited for the kids to be gone before adding friendship as a part of our relationships. I think that started happening around their late teens and we switched from 'taking kids' places to going to things with them. Mine are in their late twenties now and we have good relationships, enjoy being with each other and doing things together.

Right. I didn't mean to imply as much. I've always taken my children seriously as individuals, which means I've tried to be someone with whom they could talk. So in that sense, yes, friendship has always been there. But the functioning needs of the household--not to mention helping them understand their role in it--means that someone ultimately has to be in charge.
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