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Old Yesterday, 12:59 PM
 
1,635 posts, read 662,660 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by reneeh63 View Post
Nobody's blaming parents as the CAUSE of bedwetting - at some point though a completely blase attitude can be cruel rather than helpful, especially as kids get older.
Did you read the post I responded to? Yes they were shaming the parent saying it is their fault the bedwetting continues because they use diapers. While I do think diapering an 8 year old is too much and should never ever be done by an outsider, letting him have a few accidents will not cure it. Instead, have him deal with it by wearing depends and putting plastic under the bottom sheet to protect the mattress. There are pj's meant for older children who wet as well to keep the bedding dry. If he wets, let him remove the wet clothing, sheets and put new on all without recrimination. Eventually the accidents will slow down with age and then stop.
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Old Yesterday, 01:05 PM
 
1,635 posts, read 662,660 times
Reputation: 2833
Quote:
Originally Posted by ShellyP3 View Post
Could we? Sure. But that doesn't work well for our family. For multiple reasons.

Boys are not as well rested when sleeping on wet sheets
Wastes tons of water
Creates extra work that takes time our busy schedule doesn't allow
# 1 reason, my boys get very upset if the sheets get wet as in there mind they didn't wet the bed unless the actual bed gets wet. Wet diapers don't count in there opinion.
They are somewhat expensive but maybe better than diapers especially if you combine them with the pullups https://smile.amazon.com/Pjama-bedwe...-2-spons&psc=1 They have larger sizes as well. There are also the goodnites true fit which might be better than the pullups.
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Old Yesterday, 01:10 PM
 
Location: planet earth
4,085 posts, read 1,495,247 times
Reputation: 9144
I don't think it is at all "normal" for an eight year old to wear diapers.

I don't know what the solution is - maybe sleep in the bathtub (being half-way facetious, because I know there are terrible parents out there that would take this literally).

To me, this would be a terrible problem and I would not stop until I found a solution.

The child should also have ownership in solving this problem.
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Old Yesterday, 01:14 PM
 
Location: Florida
5,011 posts, read 3,397,671 times
Reputation: 9786
Quote:
Originally Posted by nobodysbusiness View Post
I don't think it is at all "normal" for an eight year old to wear diapers.

I don't know what the solution is - maybe sleep in the bathtub (being half-way facetious, because I know there are terrible parents out there that would take this literally).

To me, this would be a terrible problem and I would not stop until I found a solution.

The child should also have ownership in solving this problem.
They did find a solution. It's wearing diapers. Apparently the child DOES have ownership in solving the problem, since he is not bothered by the diapers but has been bothered by other solutions they tried. My son wore Goodnights until he was 10ish years old. It was not a terrible problem; it was a minor problem that we all knew he would outgrow. You don't turn a common developmental issue into a "terrible problem." What a way to make a kid neurotic! You find a solution that will work until the child outgrows the issue and that's really all there is to it. This isn't a 16 year old kid we are talking about; eight years old is still pre-puberty, and many boys still wet the bed until they get closer to puberty. It's within normal limits, even though we all hope our kid isn't the one affected by this type of delay.
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Old Yesterday, 01:22 PM
 
Location: planet earth
4,085 posts, read 1,495,247 times
Reputation: 9144
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnotherTouchOfWhimsy View Post
They did find a solution. It's wearing diapers. Apparently the child DOES have ownership in solving the problem, since he is not bothered by the diapers but has been bothered by other solutions they tried. My son wore Goodnights until he was 10ish years old. It was not a terrible problem; it was a minor problem that we all knew he would outgrow. You don't turn a common developmental issue into a "terrible problem." What a way to make a kid neurotic! You find a solution that will work until the child outgrows the issue and that's really all there is to it. This isn't a 16 year old kid we are talking about; eight years old is still pre-puberty, and many boys still wet the bed until they get closer to puberty. It's within normal limits, even though we all hope our kid isn't the one affected by this type of delay.
Totally disagree that this is within developmental norms.

If this were my kid, I would take him to see a hypnotherapist and have them suggest that he will stay dry at night or get up to go to the bathroom.

Normalizing infantile behavior is not a good solution. Can't imagine what his friends would think if they knew - he obviously can't camp out overnight, etc. I doubt the scouts would accommodate diapers.

If it happened once or twice, no big deal - but where did they get the idea that he should be diapered continuously? That is implying that he IS going to PEE in the diaper. That's what diapers are for. Why would he stop if he is being enabled like this?
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Old Yesterday, 01:27 PM
 
Location: Florida
5,011 posts, read 3,397,671 times
Reputation: 9786
Quote:
Originally Posted by nobodysbusiness View Post
Totally disagree that this is within developmental norms.

If this were my kid, I would take him to see a hypnotherapist and have them suggest that he will stay dry at night or get up to go to the bathroom.

Normalizing infantile behavior is not a good solution. Can't imagine what his friends would think if they knew - he obviously can't camp out overnight, etc. I doubt the scouts would accommodate diapers.

If it happened once or twice, no big deal - but where did they get the idea that he should be diapered continuously? That is implying that he IS going to PEE in the diaper. That's what diapers are for. Why would he stop if he is being enabled like this?
I guess since you haven't dealt with it and seen doctors regarding it, you might have less understanding that it can be a common developmental issue. It doesn't really matter if you agree or not; it is what it is. Using diapers/goodnites does not "enable" a kid whose bladder is simply not able to hold urine all night. I'm glad you have found that hypnotherapy is the right solution for your hypothetical child. For those with non-hypothetical children with this issue, maybe hypnotherapy would help and maybe it wouldn't. For my family, it wasn't a bothersome issue and it was outgrown as expected in all cases. My son went on sleepovers and I'm not actually sure if his friends knew or not, to be honest. He was not the only kid in his group who wet the bed long into childhood. He is 18 now and has not been affected by this issue in 7 or 8 years. My husband also does not wet the bed; I've known him since he was 17 and it was not an issue then just as it isn't now (he wet the bed until he was well into childhood as well; I am not sure if he went on until he was close to puberty). It was really no big deal at all for my family. YMMV.
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Old Yesterday, 01:51 PM
 
11,814 posts, read 9,599,291 times
Reputation: 15370
Quote:
Originally Posted by nobodysbusiness View Post
I don't think it is at all "normal" for an eight year old to wear diapers.

I don't know what the solution is - maybe sleep in the bathtub (being half-way facetious, because I know there are terrible parents out there that would take this literally).

To me, this would be a terrible problem and I would not stop until I found a solution.

The child should also have ownership in solving this problem.
Oy. "Terrible problem"? Nah. But I am with you on not spending vast amounts of money on diapers so the kid does not get "upset".
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Old Yesterday, 01:53 PM
 
11,814 posts, read 9,599,291 times
Reputation: 15370
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnotherTouchOfWhimsy View Post
I guess since you haven't dealt with it and seen doctors regarding it, you might have less understanding that it can be a common developmental issue. It doesn't really matter if you agree or not; it is what it is. Using diapers/goodnites does not "enable" a kid whose bladder is simply not able to hold urine all night.
This was another thought that struck me. The child cannot use certain products because they become so full that they leak. Why would there be that MUCH? If it were ME, I would be checking my thinking and examine if I were avoiding the problem by slapping a diaper on the child.
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Old Yesterday, 04:19 PM
 
Location: Oklahoma
14 posts, read 3,892 times
Reputation: 25
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnotherTouchOfWhimsy View Post
They did find a solution. It's wearing diapers. Apparently the child DOES have ownership in solving the problem, since he is not bothered by the diapers but has been bothered by other solutions they tried. My son wore Goodnights until he was 10ish years old. It was not a terrible problem; it was a minor problem that we all knew he would outgrow. You don't turn a common developmental issue into a "terrible problem." What a way to make a kid neurotic! You find a solution that will work until the child outgrows the issue and that's really all there is to it. This isn't a 16 year old kid we are talking about; eight years old is still pre-puberty, and many boys still wet the bed until they get closer to puberty. It's within normal limits, even though we all hope our kid isn't the one affected by this type of delay.
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnotherTouchOfWhimsy View Post
I guess since you haven't dealt with it and seen doctors regarding it, you might have less understanding that it can be a common developmental issue. It doesn't really matter if you agree or not; it is what it is. Using diapers/goodnites does not "enable" a kid whose bladder is simply not able to hold urine all night. I'm glad you have found that hypnotherapy is the right solution for your hypothetical child. For those with non-hypothetical children with this issue, maybe hypnotherapy would help and maybe it wouldn't. For my family, it wasn't a bothersome issue and it was outgrown as expected in all cases. My son went on sleepovers and I'm not actually sure if his friends knew or not, to be honest. He was not the only kid in his group who wet the bed long into childhood. He is 18 now and has not been affected by this issue in 7 or 8 years. My husband also does not wet the bed; I've known him since he was 17 and it was not an issue then just as it isn't now (he wet the bed until he was well into childhood as well; I am not sure if he went on until he was close to puberty). It was really no big deal at all for my family. YMMV.
Thank you so much for posting this. I guess none of these other parents have dealt with bedwetting other than on occasional accident here or there. Unfortunately for some kids there is no amount of training, shaming, punishing, etc that will cure their problem. Only time and allowing there bladder, and hormones to mature will stop this. Those that say we should make this my kids problem and make them pee all over themselves every night and them make them shamefully drag all there wet bedding thru the house to the washer simply has never dealt with this before or if they have I feel really really bad for there kids. My boys know they WILL outgrown this with time. And yes they know having a wet diaper in the morning is not exactly normal for some but it is our normal, they know everyone is different, and every family is different. They know if there bed is wet it creates more work, and they know when there actual bedding is wet is when they come to tell us there bed is wet and they are usually crying when that happens. If your child had a issue that was totally out of there control, and you had an option to make them cry and get upset and make them drag there problem thru the house, or had a solution that would keep them happy and healthy, what would you choose? We choose happy and healthy. I'm glad most of you have kids that didn't have to deal with this but we do and this is what keeps my kids happy and healthy. Will we continue to try pull up style diapers and alarms, and other things periodically dang right but until those work better for MY kids, and keep MY kids happy and healthy, we will stick to whaworks for MY kids.
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Old Yesterday, 04:48 PM
 
Location: Florida
5,011 posts, read 3,397,671 times
Reputation: 9786
Quote:
Originally Posted by somebodynew View Post
This was another thought that struck me. The child cannot use certain products because they become so full that they leak. Why would there be that MUCH? If it were ME, I would be checking my thinking and examine if I were avoiding the problem by slapping a diaper on the child.
Goodnites don't really hold that much urine. Consider how much a bladder can hold and consider how quickly one of these products would need to be able to absorb it to prevent leaks. I know that with my son, we had to use the Goodnites brand because the cheaper brands did not absorb quickly enough. I would assume that the child in question has had tests to check for diabetes, which is something that would cause excessive urination; my kids' pediatrician checked their urine every year and they had bloodwork every two years. OP, if you haven't had that type of thing checked, then you should, just to be sure. In all reality, though, it's most likely just a physical delay that will go away within a few years.
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