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She said that they got along great and loved playing with daughter and when she sent the older boys to take a bath they both asked the daughter to come sit in the bathroom with them while they bathe.
Your neighbor let her 13-year-old daughter watch your 8-year-old son bathe?
Excuse me, but your EIGHT year old still regularly wets the bed? So often that you have to keep him in diapers?
I'm sorry, but that is ridiculous. And it is your fault, not his. STOP PUTTING HIM IN ANY SORT OF DIAPERS AT ALL. Ever. Yes, there will be accidents. Yes, you will be changing sheets for awhile. But then he will get over it and be fine.
Diapers are like a trigger to a child, telling the child in toilet training transition that it is OK to let go and dump in the diaper. Once you start toilet training, diapers are OUT.
Eight is too old to still be wetting the bed so often that they have to be diapered at night. Lose the diapers. NOW.
<sigh> A while ago we had this discussion before. Bed wetting is not, I repeat not a sign of bad parenting. Many children are toilet trained to even sleep through the night, but for some reason (often it is deep sleeping) they start bed wetting. They grow out of it, often by puberty. Something about the hormonal changes changes sleep patterns. Shaming or other methods only make a disturbed child. I don't think for every child a bed wetting alarm works but it may be worth a try. Stop with the guilt trips on parents with a bed wetting child.
I know you're taking a very progressive attitude about it...but just because something is hereditary doesn't mean there are no treatments for it. And it doesn't have to be drugs. You can be as accepting as you want to be, they'll still encounter peers at some point and it's silly to not at least try lifestyle changes, bladder training, moisture alarms, and the like (just because).
BTW, I wet the bed until 10 and it was not easy - sure...everyone thought I'd grow out of it. My one sleepover was a disaster, but maybe it's worse for girls? Whatever...I was on imipramine for a short time and that was the end of it...thank god!
<sigh> A while ago we had this discussion before. Bed wetting is not, I repeat not a sign of bad parenting. Many children are toilet trained to even sleep through the night, but for some reason (often it is deep sleeping) they start bed wetting. They grow out of it, often by puberty. Something about the hormonal changes changes sleep patterns. Shaming or other methods only make a disturbed child. I don't think for every child a bed wetting alarm works but it may be worth a try. Stop with the guilt trips on parents with a bed wetting child.
Nobody's blaming parents as the CAUSE of bedwetting - at some point though a completely blase attitude can be cruel rather than helpful, especially as kids get older.
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Compromise. Let the boys put on pull ups by themselves and then put an under pad in their bed to catch any overflow. When you come home you can change the under pad if needed.
Also if the pull ups are being overwhelmed have you considered changing to adult small depends or adding an incontinence pad inside the pullup.
8 year old boys do not ask a 13 year old girl to sit on the toilet to watch them bathe
Because my little boys asked a much older, basically adult like figure that they really enjoy to sit in the bathroom with them you think you were conned. I'm sorry you feel that way. My 8 yo is very little 15% for height and weight and pretty immature for his age, and the 13 yo seems to be very mature for her age and looks quite grown up. This does not seem strange to me at all. We are very comfortable in our skin and I am very happy my kids don't have a complex or feel they need to hide from people. Do they go running down the road or even all around the house all day naked? No, but at home they do go to the living room to get dressed after a bath or in the morning. Why take that innocence away? Like I said she didn't bathe them she simply sat in the bathroom and kept them company.
Quote:
Originally Posted by NorthofHere
<sigh> A while ago we had this discussion before. Bed wetting is not, I repeat not a sign of bad parenting. Many children are toilet trained to even sleep through the night, but for some reason (often it is deep sleeping) they start bed wetting. They grow out of it, often by puberty. Something about the hormonal changes changes sleep patterns. Shaming or other methods only make a disturbed child. I don't think for every child a bed wetting alarm works but it may be worth a try. Stop with the guilt trips on parents with a bed wetting child.
Amen, and thank you. So many parents punish or shame there kids for things they have no control over, bed wetting is no difference. They will outgrow it one day and until that day comes it's just part of life, no reason to make a big deal about it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by reneeh63
Nobody's blaming parents as the CAUSE of bedwetting - at some point though a completely blase attitude can be cruel rather than helpful, especially as kids get older.
So I'm being cruel by not causing them to stress over somethey have no control over? So you think I should make a big deal about it so they feel bad, stressed, and humiliated?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cecilia_Rose
Compromise. Let the boys put on pull ups by themselves and then put an under pad in their bed to catch any overflow. When you come home you can change the under pad if needed.
Also if the pull ups are being overwhelmed have you considered changing to adult small depends or adding an incontinence pad inside the pullup.
That is exactly what we were going to do if we would have had a regular sitter come to the house but when I talked to my neighbor who I have known for a long time about it, she said she it was no big deal, and she didn't see a reason to change the routine, although I didn't think about putting a disposable pad under them. Fortunately there were no issues but if we have to use a regular sitter in the future that is a great idea. Thank you.
As to the pull ups leaking, no they are not being overwhelmed, they just leak around the legs. My kids sleep on there sides and I guess the leg guards don't work as well or don't fit my boys body as good as a diaper. Several times the bedding will be soaked but the pull up or goodnite would not be very wet. In my kids mind, the didn't wet the bed unless the actual bed gets wet. So they are only upset of there diaper leaks, thus the reason they hate pull ups style diapers. If we could find one that didn't leak would be great.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ShellyP3
Because my little boys asked a much older, basically adult like figure that they really enjoy to sit in the bathroom with them you think you were conned. I'm sorry you feel that way. My 8 yo is very little 15% for height and weight and pretty immature for his age, and the 13 yo seems to be very mature for her age and looks quite grown up. This does not seem strange to me at all. We are very comfortable in our skin and I am very happy my kids don't have a complex or feel they need to hide from people. Do they go running down the road or even all around the house all day naked? No, but at home they do go to the living room to get dressed after a bath or in the morning. Why take that innocence away? Like I said she didn't bathe them she simply sat in the bathroom and kept them company.
No way in he double hockey sticks am I going to believe TWO boys asked the 13 yr old daughter to come sit in the bathroom with them while they bathed.
Nor that the Mother of the daughter would tell you such a thing as if she is talking about the weather
Keep this "being comfortable in your skin" to yourself.
This x rated kinky stuff you brought in is about your weird fetishes, nothing more.
"The mom said she would take care of the older boys before they went to sleep. She said that they got along great and loved playing with daughter and when she sent the older boys to take a bath they both asked the daughter to come sit in the bathroom with them while they bathe."
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Last edited by FrugalFox; 03-05-2019 at 01:36 AM..
Because my little boys asked a much older, basically adult like figure that they really enjoy to sit in the bathroom with them you think you were conned. I'm sorry you feel that way. My 8 yo is very little 15% for height and weight and pretty immature for his age, and the 13 yo seems to be very mature for her age and looks quite grown up. This does not seem strange to me at all. We are very comfortable in our skin and I am very happy my kids don't have a complex or feel they need to hide from people. Do they go running down the road or even all around the house all day naked? No, but at home they do go to the living room to get dressed after a bath or in the morning. Why take that innocence away? Like I said she didn't bathe them she simply sat in the bathroom and kept them company.
A 13-year-old girl is not an adult like figure. She is a child.
I too am comfortable in my own skin and think body positivity is very important for children. However, there is a huge difference in teaching them to be comfortable in their own skin and allowing them to bathe naked with a young neighbor. Such things are inappropriate. It doesn't matter how short your 8-year-old is, he is still 8. If he still needs help bathing, that is something a trusted adult should be helping him with, not another child.
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