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Old 03-02-2019, 11:45 PM
 
4 posts, read 3,261 times
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How do moms manage the work-life balance? How do you manage being a parent and being a successful worker?
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Old 03-03-2019, 03:18 AM
 
Location: Coastal San Diego
5,024 posts, read 7,534,592 times
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What a timely post.

I'm not a mom but my dad gave me the job of taking care of my mom. When my dad died, my sisters encouraged my mom to fire me and hire a lawyer. That's exactly what she did. I was devastated at first. I went into a terrible depression. However, her decision to hire a lawyer to handle her affairs turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to me.

So now when my mom calls me looking for help, I tell her to call her lawyer. Luckily I don't need an inheritance. I hope she pisses away every nickel of money my dad gave her on lawyers.

My sisters need the inheritance money for retirement. Hasta la vista Baby!
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Old 03-03-2019, 08:15 PM
 
1,600 posts, read 933,059 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ma23 View Post
How do moms manage the work-life balance? How do you manage being a parent and being a successful worker?
They don't. Things slip left and right. This is the result of the two-income revolution where spouses wanted more stuff, but it bit us all in the a$$ because it made everything more expensive. Now, most families MUST have two incomes to survive. Oh when life was simpler.
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Old 03-03-2019, 08:47 PM
 
Location: San Diego CA>Tijuana, BC>San Antonio, TX
6,479 posts, read 7,443,518 times
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My wife is a direct clinical care RN, she works three days a week, makes a great annual salary and when and when she is home SHE IS HOME for myself and our four kids. RN direct clinical care is the type of job that pays well and unlike my line of work which has deadlines, it doesn't come home with you....well, apart from the emotional baggage that the job entails.

Life would be much tougher for our family if we were both working 9-5 five days a week.
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Old 03-04-2019, 08:58 AM
 
2,819 posts, read 2,565,974 times
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I go in to work at 6 and leave at 3 so I can be home after school and run my son to his activities, help with homework, cook dinner, walk dogs etc. I also outsource where I can by hiring a cleaning lady and having carpools for soccer practice and other activities. My husband goes in later, handles the morning activity and works a little later. We also trade off days to go to the gym in the evening. There are days our work schedules fluctuate. I also removed my work email from my phone and don’t answer work calls at home unless it’s an emergency. I try to be present for my family when at home and present for my work while at work. It’s a balancing act that requires careful planning and flexibility. Some days are better than others. Self care is also important.
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Old 03-04-2019, 09:43 AM
 
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I worked part time when my daughter was growing up. School hours, school days, brought home enough money. It was awesome. I was hired in my position before I was married, and an older co-worker told me how great it was when she was raising her kids. So I remembered that and stayed with that employer for almost 20 years. Not everyone wants to do that, but it is possible.

Quote:
Originally Posted by metoque View Post
They don't. Things slip left and right. This is the result of the two-income revolution where spouses wanted more stuff, but it bit us all in the a$$ because it made everything more expensive. Now, most families MUST have two incomes to survive. Oh when life was simpler.
When I was a kid (I'm in my 50s), most moms in our circle stayed home, but most dads had two jobs. Simpler? Maybe, but still two incomes.

My mom went to work full time when I was in kindergarten, in part to save my dad from having to have a side gig. Also because she wanted a career herself. My parents managed so well that one of my teachers thought my mom was SAH, because of all her community involvement. So that's possible, too.

Last edited by bondaroo; 03-04-2019 at 10:10 AM..
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Old 03-04-2019, 09:44 AM
 
Location: Florida
7,195 posts, read 5,688,291 times
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I was a SAHM with no income of my own until my youngest was five, over 10 years ago. We homeschool, so I could not go to work during the day, but we needed some extra income coming in and truth be told, I needed something to do other than converse with small children all day. So I started my own business. In those early years, maybe I'd work on it 1-2 hours per day, usually after the kids went to bed or sometimes in the morning while they were still kind of lazing around. Gradually, I added a bit more time here and a bit more time there. Yes, sometimes the housework was the last thing on the list and it didn't get done, but I don't have any regrets on that.

Now the kids are 18 and almost 16 and I work about 25 or 30 hours per week. They are independent with their schoolwork; my daughter sometimes needs help in math, but that's really it, for the most part. Since I work from home, I'm available for whatever is needed, if one of them needs to go to the doctor or if my son needs a ride to the airport (he travels frequently) or my daughter to the mall. I can largely make my own schedule and I enjoy talking to clients and learning new things.

I like the way I did things... I was able to spend lots of time with my kids when they were little and now they don't necessarily want me spending a ton of time with them, so it's nice that I have my own things to do. In addition to working, I'm an active volunteer with a non-profit organization, so I am able to stay pretty busy. My hope is that it will make the empty-nest years a bit easier on me than it would be had I not had a career and outside interests and activities.
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Old 03-04-2019, 11:13 AM
 
Location: Central Florida
3,257 posts, read 4,965,108 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ma23 View Post
How do moms manage the work-life balance? How do you manage being a parent and being a successful worker?
The answer is: with great difficulty. It is not easy. It helps a lot if you have a flexible job and a supportive partner.
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Old 03-04-2019, 11:43 AM
 
Location: The analog world
17,077 posts, read 13,273,696 times
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I think work-life balance and parenthood are mutually exclusive.
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Old 03-04-2019, 01:19 PM
 
1,347 posts, read 936,483 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WellShoneMoon View Post
It is not easy. It helps a lot if you have a flexible job and a supportive partner.
Very true. I am lucky enough to have both.

In addition to some of the good thoughts already offered here: I found that being a working parent got me to get more organized and efficient and make better use of my time (like posting here, lol). You can get things done in small increments (10-15 minutes here or there, instead of waiting for an hour block to open up). I'm not saying you have to make every single minute productive, but you'd be surprised how much time can be wasted throughout the day in bits and pieces if you aren't mindful.

You also learn to say no and set boundaries, so you have time and energy to focus on what is really important.
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