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Old 03-06-2019, 04:49 AM
 
478 posts, read 473,147 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mightyqueen801 View Post
We once had a mother come with her adult daughter to a job interview where I worked. That's what comes next, I suppose.
My husband and I both went with our daughter (40's) on a job interview. We were visiting out of state and she took us sightseeing and out to eat afterwards. We checked out the cafeteria while she went to the interview.

We laughed about how weird it was but decided that we were good luck for her after finding out that she got the job.
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Old 03-06-2019, 05:40 AM
 
471 posts, read 170,842 times
Reputation: 520
Her mom could have just been driving her to you.
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Old 03-06-2019, 06:20 AM
 
9,515 posts, read 6,043,148 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HappyFarm34 View Post
I help tutor college aged students to gain credit hours for a class they are taking. There's one student whose mom comes every time to tag along. Sometimes, the rest of her family comes along too, her dad and younger siblings. I haven't said anything yet to the student. She doesn't seem to really have any friends. From what I gather, she was home schooled. I think her mom needs to cut the cord. Her mom seems nice but that's not really the point. I remember being in collage and wanted my own independent separate from family. I can understand if she was under 18 but she's already an adult and think her mom needs to back off and let her be independent when it comes to attending events to gain credit hours for her college class.
It could be a number of reasons, none of which are any of your business.
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Old 03-06-2019, 07:15 AM
 
2,671 posts, read 3,199,544 times
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It is definitely weird. I know a few moms like that and they try to follow their college age children everywhere. I know of a couple of them that moved to the city where their kid went to college. It is like they don't want them to grow up.

It is usually fun watching it all unfold when the kid finds someone and gets in a serious relationship. The mom usually gets all bent out of shape because they can't follow them everywhere.
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Old 03-06-2019, 07:48 AM
 
170 posts, read 75,785 times
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Very common in Southern Europe. Not common in Northern Europe or North America.

1987-1989 borns though everywhere have a hard time living away from their birth town and hence higher separation anxiety. We're in our 30s now but it's hard to be open about living away or abroad. We're far too clingy, detail-oriented and nostalgic for that.
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Old 03-06-2019, 08:28 AM
 
479 posts, read 141,136 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by elan View Post
It could be a number of reasons, none of which are any of your business.
Thank you for your common sense!
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Old 03-06-2019, 08:44 AM
 
3,785 posts, read 3,532,973 times
Reputation: 9980
Quote:
Originally Posted by HappyFarm34 View Post
I help tutor college aged students to gain credit hours for a class they are taking. There's one student whose mom comes every time to tag along. Sometimes, the rest of her family comes along too, her dad and younger siblings. I haven't said anything yet to the student. She doesn't seem to really have any friends. From what I gather, she was home schooled. I think her mom needs to cut the cord. Her mom seems nice but that's not really the point. I remember being in collage and wanted my own independent separate from family. I can understand if she was under 18 but she's already an adult and think her mom needs to back off and let her be independent when it comes to attending events to gain credit hours for her college class.
Uhhh, creepy, makes me think of the Turpin family. Lots of similarities. Home schooled. Socially isolated. Always supervised by a parent. You know, the oldest boy took a few community college classes. His mother walked him to the classroom door, waited outside, and walked him from the classroom door.
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Old 03-06-2019, 10:00 AM
 
Location: USA
2,527 posts, read 1,912,503 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sheerbliss View Post
Why would a friend want to take her to tutoring? Because that's the kind of thing friends do for each other?

I grew up in the suburban boonies and a lot of teenagers in high school had jobs and cars. That was before teenagers were considered overgrown toddlers, I guess.

BTW, if mom and the kids are just sitting around during the tutoring, why not let the daughter drive herself? Seems practical if there's a lack of transportation in the area. A lot of parents are happy when they don't have to chauffeur their kids around anymore.

People are talking about this because it's strange and far removed from their own experience. Many of us were driving, working and living on our own at that age. My mother and aunt were married with kids.
Exactly! Even if driving and getting there was an issue, there’s public transportation. I also had a car and a job at 18 as well.

Quote:
Originally Posted by redguitar77111 View Post
Her mom could have just been driving her to you.
She STAYS the ENTIRE time in view of daughter. That’s why I’m creeped out by it. As the student gets out more in the real world, maybe she’ll rebel big time. I’ve seen it happen with kids who have been extremely sheltered. One of my cousins fits that example.

Quote:
Originally Posted by elan View Post
It could be a number of reasons, none of which are any of your business.
Quote:
Originally Posted by YorktownGal View Post
Thank you for your common sense!
When an adult aged college student is violating college policy by letting her family come and stay nearby at a table at every tutoring session or participating in an event that is meant for students, then it is my business to report the student to her College instructor. I’m not big on breaking rules.

If it was something that happened once in a great while, I’d let it slide since sometimes there’s a legit reason for doing so

Quote:
Originally Posted by parentologist View Post
Uhhh, creepy, makes me think of the Turpin family. Lots of similarities. Home schooled. Socially isolated. Always supervised by a parent. You know, the oldest boy took a few community college classes. His mother walked him to the classroom door, waited outside, and walked him from the classroom door.
Exactly!!! My heart breaks for the Turpin children. And half of them were adults. If someone would of spoken up when the boy was attending college about his mom’s bizarre behavior, they wouldn’t of suffered as long. So heartbreaking. Makes me wanna cry.

We have had other college-aged students who were home schooled come in the past and they usually come by themselves or with a friend. They didn’t have their family tagging along each time.
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Old 03-06-2019, 11:35 AM
 
Location: Molokai, Hawaii
122 posts, read 40,107 times
Reputation: 424
Quote:
Originally Posted by HappyFarm34 View Post
well, if the student isnít abiding by the rules of what the college policy says that family arenít allowed to stay, then of course Iím gonna say something and report her
You go right ahead and report her because the rules are far more important than her getting better grades in the subject or subjects she is getting tutored in. What is the punishment for chewing gum in class?
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Old 03-06-2019, 11:54 AM
 
Location: Molokai, Hawaii
122 posts, read 40,107 times
Reputation: 424
Have you considered that this student has a mild learning disability? That perhaps for any number of reasons they find it difficult to retain the information and perhaps the family member is there to help them in that regard, so when they get home they can further help them.

Unless you are a veteran teacher or a child psychologist or versed in special needs, you have absolutely no idea the dynamics behind why this situation is occurring and simply passing judgment and reporting this violation is not only short-sighted but potentially damaging. Have you considered what will happen after you file your report? What are the chances the student will stop seeing you or quit tutoring altogether? If either happens then you massively failed as a tutor.
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