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Old 04-03-2019, 02:09 PM
 
Location: Inland FL
1,154 posts, read 661,070 times
Reputation: 2077

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I hear a lot by people that their parents were/are abusive but make better grandparents and get along with their grandkids. Parents and their own adult kids often argue and don't get along despite being past teenager years. Every once in a while you do hear about grandparents having bad relationships with their grandkids or not even acknowledging them but that is in the minority. Seems like compared to the olden days, grandparents have become more involved with grandkids lives maybe in part to longer lives and retirement.
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Old 04-03-2019, 04:24 PM
 
Location: Orlando
1,915 posts, read 2,547,175 times
Reputation: 7144
I am a MUCH better grandparent than I was as a parent! I take care of my 4-y/o granddaughter (my only grandchild) two days a week, and I love the time I spend with her. I find I have almost infinite patience with her, something I never had with my own kids when they were small.

Maybe it's because I'm older, and have presumably learned a few things in my life. Maybe it's because I only have her for two ten-hour days a week, and then I take her back to her parents. Maybe it's because I'm a retired widow, and I don't have the pressures of work, raising a family, taking care of a husband. Maybe it's because she's the most wonderful, beautiful child ever born.

Maybe it's all of the above.
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Old 04-03-2019, 09:13 PM
 
Location: here
24,786 posts, read 29,606,055 times
Reputation: 32100
A grand parent's role is different. They aren't responsible for turning the kids into responsible, functioning adults. they are there to provide junk food and fun. I also think they relax a lot, compared to a new parent (or any parent in a new phase with their child), and they hopefully learn from the mistakes they made as parents. Sometimes I can't believe the things that come out of my mom's mouth. She tells me not to do things with my kids that she always did with me.
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Old Yesterday, 06:30 AM
 
Location: bold new city of the south
5,352 posts, read 4,255,930 times
Reputation: 6356
Quote:
Originally Posted by floridarebel View Post
I hear a lot by people that their parents were/are abusive but make better grandparents and get along with their grandkids. Parents and their own adult kids often argue and don't get along despite being past teenager years. Every once in a while you do hear about grandparents having bad relationships with their grandkids or not even acknowledging them but that is in the minority. Seems like compared to the olden days, grandparents have become more involved with grandkids lives maybe in part to longer lives and retirement.
Grandparents usually have more money, free time and less stress. Too much stress and not enough money makes any endeavor difficult. Grandparents mantra is; feed 'em sugar, red Kool-Aid, and send 'em home.
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Old Yesterday, 06:37 AM
 
Location: Texas
43,089 posts, read 51,613,612 times
Reputation: 69372
Perspective.
Patience.
Pocketbook.

The reason older parents also tend to be more chill.
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Old Yesterday, 09:44 AM
 
522 posts, read 224,177 times
Reputation: 1409
The demands are less and hindsight is 20/20.
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Old Yesterday, 10:26 AM
 
Location: Southeast Michigan
1,082 posts, read 927,496 times
Reputation: 1212
Quote:
Originally Posted by stan4 View Post
Perspective.
Patience.
Pocketbook.

The reason older parents also tend to be more chill.

I agree, and will add a good night's sleep!
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Old Yesterday, 10:52 AM
 
3,532 posts, read 867,531 times
Reputation: 2808
Quote:
Originally Posted by WellShoneMoon View Post
I am a MUCH better grandparent than I was as a parent! I take care of my 4-y/o granddaughter (my only grandchild) two days a week, and I love the time I spend with her. I find I have almost infinite patience with her, something I never had with my own kids when they were small.

Maybe it's because I'm older, and have presumably learned a few things in my life. Maybe it's because I only have her for two ten-hour days a week, and then I take her back to her parents. Maybe it's because I'm a retired widow, and I don't have the pressures of work, raising a family, taking care of a husband. Maybe it's because she's the most wonderful, beautiful child ever born.

Maybe it's all of the above.
It's this.
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Old Yesterday, 12:09 PM
 
Location: Warren County and loving it!
5,290 posts, read 7,472,341 times
Reputation: 2835
We don’t have the day to day stress and responsibility of being the go to for a child like a parent does.
We’re not cleaning the daily messes, doing countless loads of laundry, running to activities, worrying about homework and school functions, tests, etc.

We just get to enjoy them, they leave, and the mess gets cleaned to stay that way until the next time.
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Old Yesterday, 03:51 PM
 
Location: Fairfield, CT
5,704 posts, read 8,443,234 times
Reputation: 6062
Quote:
Originally Posted by floridarebel View Post
I hear a lot by people that their parents were/are abusive but make better grandparents and get along with their grandkids. Parents and their own adult kids often argue and don't get along despite being past teenager years. Every once in a while you do hear about grandparents having bad relationships with their grandkids or not even acknowledging them but that is in the minority. Seems like compared to the olden days, grandparents have become more involved with grandkids lives maybe in part to longer lives and retirement.
That's easy. Being a grandparent is a much easier job, and a lot more fun.
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