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Old 04-18-2019, 05:53 PM
Status: "I have strong opinions and won't apologize for them." (set 17 days ago)
 
Location: Texas
8,765 posts, read 3,319,838 times
Reputation: 18317

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Quote:
Originally Posted by NDak15 View Post
The post was honest. Sometimes the truth hurts.
?
What is so "true" about it? It's an opinion, perhaps an honest one, but that doesn't make it fact or truth.

Also, in all likelihood, the OP posted this question to get advice from other parents based on their own experiences throwing parties for their children. Some of the people responding have zip experience in that department. So while they may certainly have an opinion, it's an uninformed, inexperienced opinion. People often wonder why an OP disappears and doesn't return to a thread. It's often because of rude or inconsiderate responses.

Also, it's not unusual for ten year olds to invite their entire class to a party. Perhaps he doesn't want anyone to feel excluded. He should be commended for that. I attended a party where the entire grade level was invited to an arcade, and this was in middle school.
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Old 04-19-2019, 04:45 AM
 
Location: Long Island
6,449 posts, read 2,844,229 times
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There are a lot of people making a lot of assumptions on this thread.

OP, if you haven't been scared off, I have always had issues with people RSVPing also. I've probably complained about it on this board. Did you specify a date?

I've often had to go back to the people who didn't respond. Sometimes even then they ignore. Why is a simple yes or no so difficult for some people? Everyone knows that some venues require a number a week or so before the party, and that you pay for that number even if fewer guests show up. You also have to plan for goody bags and the right size cake or number of cupcakes.

The easiest kind of party we've done is at the movie theater. You pay one price to rent it out and you can have them serve popcorn and soda, and then bring in whatever you like. That way kids can bring siblings and the parents can stay too if they want to see the movie.

My son just turned 16. He said it was sexist that girls have sweet 16s and boys don't, so he invited a big group of friends to play capture the flag in the park all afternoon. He took care of everything but paying for the food. The had a great time. Nice to see kids just running around playing games and not staring into screens:-)
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Old 04-24-2019, 09:56 AM
 
2,382 posts, read 4,441,753 times
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Im dreading planning my daughter's upcoming party because people are so rude about RSVP's. Last year, we had the party at a trampoline venue. I'd say half of those who did RSVP didn't show and half of those that didn't bother to RSVP showed up (with extra siblings, etc). I had people RSVPing two hours before the party started. The trampoline place only alloed you to order from a local chain pizza place and the order had to be in three days before the party (not allowed to add to it). So after jumping around for two hours - the kids were starving and each got barely one, maybe two tiny squares of pizza because the parents and siblings dove in.
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Old 04-24-2019, 10:19 AM
 
9,431 posts, read 3,680,596 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bakeneko View Post
Im dreading planning my daughter's upcoming party because people are so rude about RSVP's. Last year, we had the party at a trampoline venue. I'd say half of those who did RSVP didn't show and half of those that didn't bother to RSVP showed up (with extra siblings, etc). I had people RSVPing two hours before the party started. The trampoline place only alloed you to order from a local chain pizza place and the order had to be in three days before the party (not allowed to add to it). So after jumping around for two hours - the kids were starving and each got barely one, maybe two tiny squares of pizza because the parents and siblings dove in.
There's a problem with that venue, IMHO.

I can see not being able to reduce the amount; but the pizza place is very short-sighted to not allow you to add to the order. I would think that would be fairly common, to realize people are eating more than you predicted.
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Old 04-24-2019, 10:47 AM
 
1,116 posts, read 753,592 times
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I would just have your child check with the kids who are invited, when my kids were little and even though I put down a request for rsvp, no one did but the kids did show up.
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Old 04-24-2019, 01:12 PM
 
Location: Colorado
11,307 posts, read 7,015,384 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maduro lonsdale View Post
My god the level of negativity here is outstanding sometimes.

To the OP...how did you distribute the invites? Mail? Give to your son to hand out? I ask because our youngest daughter is notorious for not handing out anything we give her on her way to school. We've looked in her bookbag from time to time and found stuff weeks and months old and overdue.

Otherwise a followup with the parents is a good idea. RSVPing in reasonable time is becoming a lost art.
This is what I was thinking, but more along the lines of if paper invites were given to the Birthday kiddo to give to classmates, then you have TWO very weak points in the chain of communication that needs to reach the other kids' parents so that they can plan to bring them to a party. Your child might have excitedly handed out invites...but how many are riding around in his friends' backpacks? Yeah...

The other thought I have is...so many people are saying "contact the parents." Call, text, email them... Right, so you know all of his schoolmates' parents contact info how? Because I didn't know my sons' classmates' parents. If you aren't a PTA Mom (as I wasn't) and it's not a small town sort of environment, I'm not sure how you'd go about having that ability.

When I was a youngish Mom of youngish kids, I felt a lot of pressure to put on these huge birthday parties. We had a couple of years where no one showed up but their cousins. And they were still fairly young and were happy to run around playing with their cousins, and didn't really care that other kids didn't come to the party. But I was spending WAY too much money doing all of this every year. I think that sometimes parents feel obligated to go nuts about such things, more than we really need to. And I regret it because my sons could have learned better lessons about the value of money, if I'd reined in that impulse. For a while now, I've just taken my (ages 17/20) sons out for dinner with maybe a couple of their friends (or a girlfriend) invited, and gave them a few small gifts or a modest amount of money in a card. Then as the sun goes down, if the weather is good, maybe we go for a walk together or something, or if it's inclement, we play a board game, or we eat cake at home and watch a favorite movie they pick. Just having dedicated time together means more to them, than a huge, expensive production. And even though we do quality time together fairly often, it somehow never stops being special.
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Old 04-24-2019, 01:20 PM
 
8,971 posts, read 13,117,601 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sonic_Spork View Post
This is what I was thinking, but more along the lines of if paper invites were given to the Birthday kiddo to give to classmates, then you have TWO very weak points in the chain of communication that needs to reach the other kids' parents so that they can plan to bring them to a party. Your child might have excitedly handed out invites...but how many are riding around in his friends' backpacks? Yeah...

The other thought I have is...so many people are saying "contact the parents." Call, text, email them... Right, so you know all of his schoolmates' parents contact info how? Because I didn't know my sons' classmates' parents. If you aren't a PTA Mom (as I wasn't) and it's not a small town sort of environment, I'm not sure how you'd go about having that ability.

When I was a youngish Mom of youngish kids, I felt a lot of pressure to put on these huge birthday parties. We had a couple of years where no one showed up but their cousins. And they were still fairly young and were happy to run around playing with their cousins, and didn't really care that other kids didn't come to the party. But I was spending WAY too much money doing all of this every year. I think that sometimes parents feel obligated to go nuts about such things, more than we really need to. And I regret it because my sons could have learned better lessons about the value of money, if I'd reined in that impulse. For a while now, I've just taken my (ages 17/20) sons out for dinner with maybe a couple of their friends (or a girlfriend) invited, and gave them a few small gifts or a modest amount of money in a card. Then as the sun goes down, if the weather is good, maybe we go for a walk together or something, or if it's inclement, we play a board game, or we eat cake at home and watch a favorite movie they pick. Just having dedicated time together means more to them, than a huge, expensive production. And even though we do quality time together fairly often, it somehow never stops being special.
It's not that hard to find out people's contact info. White pages is online now. I don't know that you'll get them all (my parents were always unlisted) but I think a good majority of phone #'s (landlines, anyhow) can be found online.
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Old 04-24-2019, 02:39 PM
Status: "I have strong opinions and won't apologize for them." (set 17 days ago)
 
Location: Texas
8,765 posts, read 3,319,838 times
Reputation: 18317
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bakeneko View Post
Im dreading planning my daughter's upcoming party because people are so rude about RSVP's. Last year, we had the party at a trampoline venue. I'd say half of those who did RSVP didn't show and half of those that didn't bother to RSVP showed up (with extra siblings, etc). I had people RSVPing two hours before the party started. The trampoline place only alloed you to order from a local chain pizza place and the order had to be in three days before the party (not allowed to add to it). So after jumping around for two hours - the kids were starving and each got barely one, maybe two tiny squares of pizza because the parents and siblings dove in.
I've heard this is a typical problem with birthday parties at trampoline places.

Anyway, how rude for the parents to eat the pizza. I never do that at a birthday party unless it's clear there are leftovers and the kids are finished eating.
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Old 04-24-2019, 02:53 PM
 
2,382 posts, read 4,441,753 times
Reputation: 3425
Quote:
Originally Posted by ClaraC View Post
There's a problem with that venue, IMHO.

I can see not being able to reduce the amount; but the pizza place is very short-sighted to not allow you to add to the order. I would think that would be fairly common, to realize people are eating more than you predicted.
I agree. In their defense, they had literally just opened and maybe were still figuring some things out. It was crazy because the pizza came from Dominos down the street. The one thing they did right was the kids jumped, then there was the party portion and then they leave. Some trampoline parties I have been to - the parents are trying to round the kids up to do pizza/cake and as soon as they get a couple corralled in the party room , others are escaping. I've been to parties where the birthday child doesn't really get to open gifts or have cake singing.

We moved states two years ago. The first year - we tried to have more of a cookout/bbq party at the house since we had moved towards the end of the school year. I thought if we had ahouse party and invited basically all the kids from her class and their families that more kids would come since this is s small town and no body really knew us yet. I was hoping to get to know kids for her to play with over summer. No one really showed up.

The next year was the trampoline park. I don't think OP's kid isn't popular - I think parents are a-holes, lol.

We attend all parties we are invited to unless we have a compelling reason not to go. And we RSVP either way as soon as possible.
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Old 04-24-2019, 03:03 PM
 
15,818 posts, read 17,601,455 times
Reputation: 15574
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jdawg8181 View Post
It's not that hard to find out people's contact info. White pages is online now. I don't know that you'll get them all (my parents were always unlisted) but I think a good majority of phone #'s (landlines, anyhow) can be found online.
Lots of people here are unlisted. Of course, we had just moved at the beginning of my dgd's kindergarten school year and the school did not hand out address lists (when we lived in Illinois and in Louisiana we got class lists with phone numbers, but not here in Texas).

We didn't even know the names of her classmates, much less the phone numbers of the parents. Her birthday party ended up being with her brother and one or two neighborhood children. No inviting the whole class at that point.
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