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Old 05-26-2019, 05:57 PM
 
Location: Business ethics is an oxymoron.
1,849 posts, read 2,253,336 times
Reputation: 3865

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I'm a terrible father. Consider the following:

I bathe and dress my daughter, and change my daughters diapers when needed.

I hold her in front of the mirror every day and tell her how beautiful she is in the hope of instilling confidence in her so she will have esteem and not be taken advantage of when she gets older.

I put her to bed every night.

I always....always...without exception, give her a kiss on the forehead when I strap her in the car prior to driving anywhere. Even if it's a one block drive to Target.

I restrict what she watches on TV to age appropriate and for how long. God forbid she get her impressionable and fragile mind filled with garbage or she become addicted to it and turn into a couch potato.

I read to her regularly. Even if it's the same story I've already read to her a hundred times. I want her to eventually build a solid vocabulary. And hear my voice. Anyone have a problem with that?

I want her cognitive development to be strong and solid. And if there's something wrong or if I'm doing something wrong, I want to know about it. I won't put my pride ahead of her well being.

I give her cuddles and piggyback rides. Because. Baby girls apparently love cuddles and piggyback rides.

I'm a real slave driver because I chase her up and down the hallway. Heaven forbid she learn to exercise and enjoy it. Let's pretend we don't hear the laughs and giggles now.

I make sure she is fed regularly. Perhaps what's most egregious is giving her milk every night before bed. Not like the vitamins will help with her well being or the calcium and protein will help with her muscular or skeletal structures or anything.

Speaking of which, what should make you truly aghast is I take her to the grocery store with me regularly and when in the produce section, let her pick out the apple she wants and let her eat it as we shop. Yes, I give her unlimited fruits: all the apples, bananas, and watermelon she wants. I'm a real ogre for not giving her candy and Ding-Dongs.

I play the same music I like to her. Yes, it's a lot of old and obscure stuff. Indeed much of it is what *I* was raised on by my father when *I* was a kid. But it's what I like. Heaven forbid I broaden her horizons or give her something to remember me by when I'm gone.

So she gets a little dirty when outside in the fresh air and sunshine on a nice day. Oh the horror. Deal with it. The dirt will wash off. The immune system and memories she will build will last the rest of her life.

I want her to someday be more educated, smart, and successful than I was. And to have the smarts, courage, and motivation to do so.

I'm a terrible father.
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Old 05-26-2019, 06:03 PM
 
Location: The point of no return, er, NorCal
7,204 posts, read 4,610,047 times
Reputation: 9251
What?
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Old 05-26-2019, 06:38 PM
 
3,162 posts, read 1,198,275 times
Reputation: 6193
yes.
you
are so
terrible.
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Old 05-27-2019, 01:29 AM
 
6,057 posts, read 2,789,135 times
Reputation: 15336
I enjoyed it!

Best part was the Letting the Little one get dirty and Not scolding her for such. Gosh I loved making mud pies and handing them off to my parent.

My Terrible father simply did all the opposite things...Like walk away from a lovely lady and six kids. Yup he got his exercise from chasing other women.

Thanks for this post....I think my grand daughters would say the same about their Dad. He has two little "daddys- girls".
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Old 05-27-2019, 02:27 AM
 
76 posts, read 28,066 times
Reputation: 132
Towards the end, I kept thinking I was about to read how the wife was leaving him and filed an order of protection accusing him of abuse. It happens all the time and good parents (and the kid(s)) get taken for a ride on the crazy train. Glad it's not the case here with the OP. Enjoy em while you can. The old cliche is so true: "they grow up so fast."
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Old 05-27-2019, 03:56 AM
 
18,278 posts, read 23,403,969 times
Reputation: 34161
I think its a poke in the eye of all the pc ….nanny bs we hear …

I have a much more egregious list as a dad and my kid turned out great a smart kind hearted pharmacist..

I let my son ...ride in the back of a truck...….ride his bike without a helmet.....bought him a shotgun at 12 to go hunting with me... gave him a sip of beer when he was under-aged (he hated it..as most kids do)
we ate ice cream for breakfast ….. and jumped off bridges to go swimming..


yep I think this is the sarcasm the op was going for.... sounds like he's tired of hearing all the potential wrongs parents can do to a child....
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Old 05-27-2019, 04:54 AM
 
12,029 posts, read 9,809,190 times
Reputation: 15627
Quote:
Originally Posted by Des-Lab View Post
I'm a terrible father. Consider the following:

I bathe and dress my daughter, and change my daughters diapers when needed.

I hold her in front of the mirror every day and tell her how beautiful she is in the hope of instilling confidence in her so she will have esteem and not be taken advantage of when she gets older.
Well of course someone would have to find fault. I'm in.

Please don't value her in your words and actions based on her looks but on her character and integrity which starts YOUNG!

Cheers.
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Old 05-27-2019, 08:06 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
42,639 posts, read 41,381,512 times
Reputation: 81963
Quote:
Originally Posted by mainebrokerman View Post
I think its a poke in the eye of all the pc .nanny bs we hear
Thank you for clarifying.

The first 2/3 of it read like a checklist of things a good father would do, and the "back of the pickup" mentality didn't click with me, the way it was written.

I agree with somebody new: She only needs to tell herself she's beautiful, and that kind of self-esteem can't be externally validated. It's possible for someone to have high self-confidence but low self-esteem. Many psychologists believe we are born with healthy self-esteem that is then strengthened or weakened by our life experiences.

Kids can't be fooled by meaningless praise. Providing her with opportunities to challenge herself, succeed AND fail but keep learning and growing will help bolster her sense of self-worth.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.
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Old 05-27-2019, 09:30 AM
 
794 posts, read 217,976 times
Reputation: 2202
Quote:
Originally Posted by mainebrokerman View Post
I think its a poke in the eye of all the pc .nanny bs we hear

I have a much more egregious list as a dad and my kid turned out great a smart kind hearted pharmacist..

I let my son ...ride in the back of a truck....ride his bike without a helmet.....bought him a shotgun at 12 to go hunting with me... gave him a sip of beer when he was under-aged (he hated it..as most kids do)
we ate ice cream for breakfast .. and jumped off bridges to go swimming..


yep I think this is the sarcasm the op was going for.... sounds like he's tired of hearing all the potential wrongs parents can do to a child....
Where in "nanny bs" "pc" society do you hear people saying not to bathe your children, change their diapers, read to them, feed them fruits and vegetables, kiss them, buckle them in in the car, put them to bed at night, not let them watch too much TV, feed them, etc.? What country do you live in???


(And where did most of the replies to this thread that I saw yesterday go?)
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Old 05-27-2019, 09:38 AM
 
581 posts, read 122,130 times
Reputation: 1920
Quote:
Originally Posted by mainebrokerman View Post
I think its a poke in the eye of all the pc .nanny bs we hear

I have a much more egregious list as a dad and my kid turned out great a smart kind hearted pharmacist..

I let my son ...ride in the back of a truck....ride his bike without a helmet.....bought him a shotgun at 12 to go hunting with me... gave him a sip of beer when he was under-aged (he hated it..as most kids do)
we ate ice cream for breakfast .. and jumped off bridges to go swimming..

yep I think this is the sarcasm the op was going for.... sounds like he's tired of hearing all the potential wrongs parents can do to a child....
What?

That.
Makes.
Zero.
Sense.

Mostly, I think this is because you don't really understand the concept of political correctness - no, political correctness does not mean 'anything I don't agree with'.
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