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I have no kids so, I obviously can't understand, but after watching people I know go through the games, practice and tournament thing with multiple kids and the time and travel involved I'm scratching my head at how parents got sold on this being normal and OK. I'm a huge proponent of kids' team sports but I don't understand how it turned into the monster it is now. Do the benefits outweigh the burdens put on the families? Is it even possible for a kid to be on a good team if his parent/s aren't able to drive him all over creation every weekend to his games and tournaments?
I have no kids so, I obviously can't understand, but after watching people I know go through the games, practice and tournament thing with multiple kids and the time and travel involved I'm scratching my head at how parents got sold on this being normal and OK. I'm a huge proponent of kids' team sports but I don't understand how it turned into the monster it is now. Do the benefits outweigh the burdens put on the families? Is it even possible for a kid to be on a good team if his parent/s aren't able to drive him all over creation every weekend to his games and tournaments?
It depends on your definition of "good."
Some people think a good team shatters all competition.
Some think a good team is a chance to have fun and learn a skill.
Some think a good team is a safe environment for taking risks and exploring new activities.
Having been through this to varying degrees of success with three sons, I think a couple of factors have changed kids' sports.
Schools can be overcrowded, so the chance of a kid being chosen for a 10-member basketball team in a class of 400 students has dwindled.
In some suburbs the only way to get to school is to be driven there, so fewer kids are organizing their own sports play, which means parents HAVE to get involved, and parents tend to ruin everything kids do.
The idea that all kids have to go to college means that competition has spiked, so the pressure to be sure your kid is as prepared as possible is huge for some. Parents are forgoing vacations and home maintenance to be able to pay for hitting lessons or private soccer coaches, etc.
Only the families involved can say whether the benefits outweigh the burden. It is fun to be involved with the team activities and watching your child do well. But some parents derive much of their own self-worth from that association, and other siblings who aren't involved can feel left out or like tagalongs.
Kids sports can have so many benefits, but parents sometimes go crazy signing kids up for too much.
When I saw your post title, I thought it was about bad behavior at kids games. My granddaughter (5th grade) had a volleyball match yesterday where the emotions got so heated that parents were trying to physically fight each other. All the girls were crying. What a terrible example for their children.
This really is it. It's gotten to the point where, while they're engineering their kids' entire social lives, they don't even bother with kids that aren't on the same sports teams. The parents of one of my son's classmates continuously post about their future baseball superstar's incredible dedication to his craft. He gives everything he has and more on the field. There are pictures from their at least weekly trips to the batting cages where he spends all of his time improving his skills. Pictures of him with teammates who are the best friends he will ever have, because they are "writing their stories together." This started when he was 6.
My son is 9 and on a travel soccer team. This is his 4th year of playing and 1st year on a travel team. While it is quite a commitment during the season he loves it and we also enjoy it as well. I think it's very import for kids, especially at his age, to be as social as possible and more importantly physically active. Plus it is a great group of people to include the kids, parents, and coaches. They are focusing on learning the game and working as a team and not so much on winning.
However, I do believe specific sports can get pretty out of hand when it comes to the financial burden and time commitment. I see some of the parents that have their kids in travel hockey and lacrosse and that is just insane IMO at that age. Also, when the parents get out of hand when the team is losing for yelling at the ref it becomes embarrassing for everyone, especially the child.
I'm not against kids playing sports and I believe that not only is it a great way for kids to get exercise, learn to play as a team and yes even how to lose, but keep trying. I think the big problem is some parents living their lives and dreams through their children.
I don't know if it still holds true, but there are (or were) at least two tiers of sports. The thing all the kids in our area aspired to were traveling teams, you know the highly competitive teams that only accepted the best players, the ones whose parents could commit a fair amount of time and money. The lower tier is recreational sports, through parks and recreation depts, or sometimes churches. They don't have nearly the prestige of travel sports, but that's what my kids participated in and they had fun, learned sportsmanship, and didn't have a lot of pressure to perform. I really hope recreational sport teams are still around for kids who can't afford, don't qualify for, or simply don't want the demands of travel teams.
My son dropped rec soccer when it was turning into 3 practices and 1 game a week. for REC soccer!! For competition, it was almost twice that. Ridiculous.
And kids are so overscheduled that they often aren't able to just have a fun, pick up game in the local park in lieu of playing in a league.
My kiddo is not particularly athletic but said he does kind of miss playing soccer, I wish that there was some in between option that he could have stayed with.
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