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I'm tired of responding actually. If you read the first post...it's about how my daughter is getting "the attitude" that I got when I was raising her. It all seems to come back when our children are raising their children.
And no I'm not unhappy that she went to and graduated from a top notch college....
I just see it more and more in today's kids "the attitude" I know it all....
I see that so much has changed in the 60 yrs when I lived with my parents at 18 and out of high school, but today the children come across that they deserve it all. I see this with many young people. That's another topic.
Today there is so much more money than after the depression when I grew up.
And just like everyone who posts, there is so much to the posts that isn't known.
Last edited by jaminhealth; 06-23-2019 at 09:55 PM..
Yes, I’m very aware of that, having raised two of them myself. Our children, however, are on their own paths. It’s difficult to see them struggle, but at a certain point, we must back away and let them move ahead on their own. I support standards of housekeeping and contributing to household expenses for those who choose to live at home temporarily as young adults, but I do not think it’s reasonable to impose ourselves upon their dietary choices, career paths, relationships, etc. They must be given room to make their own mistakes and to learn from them.
Good grief, you are correct...but the grandgirl just moved in and it will all unfold...my daughter was just sharing with me about the attitude and the sloppy apt she moved out of on campus. Sorry I even posted here....
I’ve known some vegans who had to start adding some protein to their diet such as eggs and cheese cause they were getting sick. I don’t think it’s good for everyone and just because it’s vegan or vegetarian doesn’t mean it’s nonfat. I’ve known some heavy vegetarians.
True this. Oldest DD and "vegan" cookies comes to mind. She has a health food business, and carries a line of large, amazing tasting vegan cookies. On a stressful day, she'd scarf down four or five. Bear in mind, the cookies contain about 700 (one cookie is supposed to be two servings) calories a piece. She packed on quite a few extra pounds from these.
Yes, I’m very aware of that, having raised two of them myself. Our children, however, are on their own paths. It’s difficult to see them struggle, but at a certain point, we must back away and let them move ahead on their own. I support standards of housekeeping and contributing to household expenses for those who choose to live at home temporarily as young adults, but I do not think it’s reasonable to impose ourselves upon their dietary choices, career paths, relationships, etc. They must be given room to make their own mistakes and to learn from them.
What’s glaring is the lack of empathy by the OP. I doubt her granddaughter is happy she hasn’t found a job yet or has gained weight, but instead of support she’s getting judgement. And if a kid has attitude, it was formed well before they went off to college. Education, peer pressure and social media influence are just convenient scape goats to blame.
About "knowing it all" and the generations and what they knew or didn't...I knew so little about life at 18+ and now at 81 I believe I've gained some wisdom from all of life's experiences. Good and bad.
Talking about experiences brings to mind about just having children and raising them and that umbilical cord is never cut...never unless one is totally heartless. I have two good friends who have never experienced the ups and downs of having and raising children, and they are Ups and Downs....Joys and Sorrows.
If you don't have the wisdom at 55 or 81 to know that it's inappropriate to talk to an adult about her weight (she knows she's gained weight, she doesn't need you to tell her), especially during a stressful transition in her life, then maybe you should dial it back on complaining about your granddaughter being a "know it all"?
About "knowing it all" and the generations and what they knew or didn't...I knew so little about life at 18+ and now at 81 I believe I've gained some wisdom from all of life's experiences. Good and bad.
Talking about experiences brings to mind about just having children and raising them and that umbilical cord is never cut...never unless one is totally heartless. I have two good friends who have never experienced the ups and downs of having and raising children, and they are Ups and Downs....Joys and Sorrows.
I'm a 26 year old living with my mother in law and her mother; ages 55 and 78. There are plenty of times when I'm a "know it all" because my experiences at my age are unique and specific to my life. They also come off as "know it alls" when they share their unique experiences and how they related to their lives. We don't ridicule or say the others wrong because we have different opinions, rather we appreciate what the other has shared and share our own experiences back. They don't consider me stupid or unlearned because I'm younger and have a different perspective and I don't write off their words as outdated or automatically obsolete. We build on top of each other because in a ideal family situation that's what you do to help the family itself grow in knowledge and experiences to share to future generations.
No ones life and experiences is better or more important, nor do any of us truly "Know It All". If anything we're sharing what we've learned and why it's important to us in our moment, not to annoy but to reveal something the others may not be informed or updated on. That and things don't stay the same forever, times bring changes and sometimes the older we get the more we aren't involved, pay attention, or straight up reject the new ways of the current generation.
Your granddaughter and her mother have lived in two completely different generational times. You all learned things independently once you moved out of your mother's wings and have new information to share. Your granddaughter is just trying to do what is her right; to engage and share her experiences with her loved ones as a way of showing her abilities of absorbing her surroundings and educating herself in new interests.She had to sit and listen to you both for 20+ years and now it's her time to join, except you're both seem to be rejecting and ridiculing her every step of the way.
Stop holding your age above your granddaughter, humble yourself, and start listening to the poor girl. She has gone through years of building her knowledge base and expanded her education, she deserved to be heard and I doubt her family telling her to stop being a normal adult isn't helping her mentally or emotionally leading to her excessive behavior with eating and exercising.
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