I want a Baby and My husband does not? What to do? how to deal? (legal, single mom)
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Your husband should understand your desires to have your own natural child. Out of love for you he should understand that this is an important issue for you and allow you to become a mother. It sounds like he has had a handful of complications with his children but this doesn't mean you will with this child. Perhaps it can be a fresh start for him. You better get on this before you both get any older. Best of luck!
Your husband should understand your desires to have your own natural child. Out of love for you he should understand that this is an important issue for you and allow you to become a mother. It sounds like he has had a handful of complications with his children but this doesn't mean you will with this child. Perhaps it can be a fresh start for him. You better get on this before you both get any older. Best of luck!
She should understand his desire to not be a father again for the next 18 years minimum. Out of love for him, she should understand that this is an important issue for him and needs to respect his wishes, especially since all the complications he had with his children, even though it doesn't mean he would have any with a child with her. It can be the beginning of the end for the marriage, so she better get on this and decide if he or any future kids without him is more important, as neither one of of them are getting any older.
Never a good idea for someone to be forced into parenthood.
Do i just try and get pregnant and cross fingersw everything will be ok ?
No, no, no, no, NO. In case I wasn't clear enough, NO!
This is absolutely wrong and deceitful. You've spent all this time with your husband, neither of you wanting children. Just because you suddenly decide you want them does not mean you have the right to force parenthood on your husband.
If you can't get over not having children and are determined to have one despite the fact that your husband doesn't, do him (and your future child) a favor and have that child with someone who does want one.
No child should be brought into a home occupied by someone who doesn't want it.
I can understand his point of view. 52 is old to be having a baby, in my opinion. most are becoming granparents or paying college tuition at 52. The only thing you can do is wait it out and see if he changes his mind. Maybe once he sees how much you want a child, he will start to consider it. Give it a while to sink in, and he may just come around.
bytheway- do not try to get pregnant behind his back!!
That is really selfish because you obviously knew what his stance was on kids when you got married to him. If he does NOT come around than you honestly only have two options A) Get out of your marriage or B) decide you love him enough to stick with your orig. plan. But do not get yourself preggers behind his back.
That is such a tough call. Everyone has the right to change their mind, but if you agreed to it in the beginning to not have children you can't expect him to change his mind too. You either have to hope he changes his mind over time, or leave if you want a child more than your marriage. But under no condition should you bind him into a life long committment with a child behind his back. That would be a very selfish move. Just my opinion for what it is worth.
just seen your question ? have you sorted anything out ? , i have gone on internet tonight to look for views , i have been married for 10 years when we got married we never wanted children then could not afford them , split up due to finacial problems got back together with no money worries enjoyed each others company and a nice lifestyle now i am 36 my hubby is 41 and it has suddendly hit me i want a family , i plucked up courage and mentioned it and was not expecting what he said , i thought it woulda been a shock at first but thought he would change his mind after a week or 2 but no he does not want a family and would not of got back together if he thought i did , i coulda sworn i told him when we got back i wanted a family , but have just been waiting to make sure we was def happy and secure i am totally gutted and don't know were to turn do i just try and get pregnant and cross fingersw everything will be ok ? i am in total turmoil as i am sure other people have been, please let me know your thoughts on this and how it turned out coz i really don't know were to go next thanks
How would you feel if someone did that to you?
If it were me, and I was the guy, I'd leave in a minute because of your deception and underhanded behavior.
How or why would he ever trust you again?
How could you live with yourself?
What effect would this have on a potential child?
No, it is not the wrong advice.
If there is no trust, there is no relationship.
If you want to accept lies and deception, go right ahead.
Trust is the basis of all open relationships.
Dishonesty destroys.
I’m also going through the same thing, my husband is 39 and I am 33 I feel you, it is hart breaking, the difference is that we did agree on having one child when we got married, after 8yrs. He change is mine, and I really don’t know what to do. Like veuvegirl said
"You have to think about what you want more; a baby or your husband.”
And I want both, if I choose one I loose the other…..
Last edited by mbgly; 11-24-2008 at 02:37 PM..
Reason: spelling
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Love, Trust, Partnership?
