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Old 08-11-2019, 06:32 PM
 
8 posts, read 2,183 times
Reputation: 22

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I have bipolar. I am in a relationship with a guy who doesn't want to have kids.
Now I am questioning having kids myself.
I like to be a mom. But I don't want to have bipolar kids.
I also don't want to be depressed or mean c in my pregnancy and get crazy with child hyper or tantrum.
But worst, I don't want to break up with my current boyfriend, find another guy, decide to go through pregnancy, have th kids and then regret having the kids.
I want to be honest with me. Have you ever regret being parent and would change your mind if you had a chance to?
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Old 08-11-2019, 06:34 PM
 
Location: Tyler, TX
722 posts, read 653,523 times
Reputation: 433
I’d have done it differently, and timed it better, but yes, I’d have kids.

Running counterfactuals while I have little humans to raise doesn’t help much though. You will have to do what’s right by the kids you have.
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Old 08-11-2019, 06:38 PM
 
8 posts, read 2,183 times
Reputation: 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by jcp123 View Post
I’d have done it differently, and timed it better, but yes, I’d have kids.

Running counterfactuals while I have little humans to raise doesn’t help much though. You will have to do what’s right by the kids you have.
Thanks for the answer
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Old 08-11-2019, 06:42 PM
 
Location: Tyler, TX
722 posts, read 653,523 times
Reputation: 433
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tina66 View Post
Thanks for the answer
I also forgot to say that the paradox of parenting is that you donít even realize the gravity of it until you have a kid. Donít spend time regretting, spend time loving and raising them. Itíll always be worth it if you focus on doing your best by them.
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Old 08-11-2019, 09:33 PM
 
5,667 posts, read 2,433,806 times
Reputation: 16918
Yes. I love my kids. The second time around, I would do some things differently, chiefly because I was learning how to be a dad, but I'd still have the same kids all over again.
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Old 08-12-2019, 07:17 AM
 
Location: MID ATLANTIC
7,782 posts, read 18,819,446 times
Reputation: 8497
I was never one of those moms that went over the top on motherhood - meaning i didnt read the latest and greatest how to be the best mom ever. I made plenty of mistakes. (Not making any comments on ex). I was a working mom, married, doing the best I could. Baseball mom, movie pal, and procurer of the best pets ever. When my boys were in their early teens I wasn't naive to think my kids wouldn't experiment with alcohol, maybe pot. But living in the DC area, we had shared with them if they wanted their dream job and if it required a security clearance, make sure they could pass a lie detector test. Little did we know, it was that commentary that gave them the motivation to say no in high school. Both drink in moderation, if at all, and one is a bartender at a major casino complex, lol.

I relish every minute of motherhood and am so proud of them both.
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Old 08-12-2019, 06:31 PM
 
Location: BBC
486 posts, read 64,481 times
Reputation: 477
I would for surely do it again, though family life (raising kids and all) didn't come easy for us. It can be a financial strain, just as it can be a free-time killer, but overall I am still content having gone the course of parenthood.
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Old 08-13-2019, 09:31 AM
 
7,131 posts, read 2,580,745 times
Reputation: 16329
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tina66 View Post
I have bipolar. I am in a relationship with a guy who doesn't want to have kids.
Now I am questioning having kids myself.
I like to be a mom. But I don't want to have bipolar kids.
I also don't want to be depressed or mean c in my pregnancy and get crazy with child hyper or tantrum.
But worst, I don't want to break up with my current boyfriend, find another guy, decide to go through pregnancy, have th kids and then regret having the kids.
I want to be honest with me. Have you ever regret being parent and would change your mind if you had a chance to?
I would do it again. As a matter of fact, I miss my kids as babies and toddlers. I'd like to go back to those days.
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Old 08-13-2019, 11:59 AM
 
187 posts, read 58,978 times
Reputation: 617
Yes, we would have kids again. If we had a "do over" there are obviously some areas in which we would parent differently.


Since you disclosed that you suffer from Bipolar, you have the additional responsibility of considering that health concern. I'm sure you have probably already thought about what I'm about to suggest...but just in case.

- How has having the Bipolar medical condition impacted your life regarding school, work, personal relationships and over all health?

- What is your family history? Has anyone else in your immediate family been diagnosed? Depending on the answer, your children may be genetically predisposed to it also. Are you comfortable and accepting of the possibility that you may have to parent a child/children with a health condition?

- If you currently rely on medication for your health, can you stay on the medication throughout your pregnancy or if your medication has to be discontinued..do you have a support system (family, medical provider..etc.) and backup plan in place during your pregnancy?

I admire you for taking the time to inquire about such a serious life step as becoming a parent and planning ahead.

I am personally familiar with the struggles you may face as I am legal guardian of someone who struggles with a mental health concern and also have an adult child who is a researcher in the field of mental health with emphasis on maternal/fetal health.

Good Luck and Best Wishes!!!

Last edited by CentralUSHomeowner; 08-13-2019 at 01:15 PM..
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Old 08-13-2019, 01:12 PM
 
8 posts, read 2,183 times
Reputation: 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by CentralUSHomeowner View Post
Yes, we would have kids again. If we had a "do over" there are obviously some areas in which we would parent differently.


Since you disclosed that you suffer from Bipolar, you have the additional responsibility of considering that health concern. I'm sure you have probably already thought about what I'm about to suggest...but just in case.

- How has having bipolar impacted your life regarding school, work, personal relationships and over all health?

- What is your family history? Has anyone else in your immediate family been diagnosed? Depending on the answer, your children may be genetically predisposed to it also. Are you comfortable and accepting of that?

- If you currently rely on medication for your health, can you stay on the medication throughout your pregnancy or must you come off and if medication has to be discontinued..do you have a support system (family, medical provider..etc.) and backup plan in place?

I admire you for taking the time to inquire about such a serious life step as becoming a parent and planning ahead.

I am personally familiar with the struggles you may face as I am legal guardian of someone who struggles with a mental health problem and also have an adult child who is a researcher in the field of mental health with emphasis on maternal/fetal health.

Good Luck and Best Wishes!!!
I have bipolar and taking medication. My dad has bipolar as well but doesn't take medicine.
There is no known effect of my meds with pregnancy however the company that has medication suggest to take meds while pregnant only if the benefit of meds is better than the risk on affecting the babies
I don't hav any support family around me. No parents or family or friends who help me in pregnancy or taking care of kids.

Bipolar affected my life when I wasn't medicated.
Now it is less but still affecting.
I was able to have a semi normal life with bipolar and anxiety. However, I am scared my next generation will be suffer more if they have another type of bipolar or severe one.

I also am in a relationship with a guy who doesn't want to have kids and I am happy.
The only problem is that I may want to have kids some day..

Last edited by Tina66; 08-13-2019 at 02:07 PM..
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