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Old 09-02-2019, 06:37 AM
 
460 posts, read 477,373 times
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My son lives near the west coast and I live on the east coast. He lives by himself, lives a pretty frugal lifestyle and he makes a lot more money than I do. He recently needed me to stay with him for a few days since he had some minor surgery. He offered to pay for my plane ticket, and I didn't take him up on the offer initially. It somehow seems wrong for the child to pay for the parent. But he does make a lot more money than I do and traveling out there has impacted my finances to a degree. I bought a lot of groceries while out there, and had to buy quite a few practical things since my son lives so "frugally" shall we say.

So, would you ask your son to reimburse for the plane ticket?
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Old 09-02-2019, 06:50 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
44,236 posts, read 42,757,083 times
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I would not ask him to reimburse me once I had already declined his offer to pay for it, no.

Next time I probably would say yes if he offered to pay, though.

It's great that you were able to be with him for his procedure! I hope all went well.
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Old 09-02-2019, 07:01 AM
 
Location: Dallas TX
15,122 posts, read 21,979,406 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
I would not ask him to reimburse me once I had already declined his offer to pay for it, no.

Next time I probably would say yes if he offered to pay, though.

It's great that you were able to be with him for his procedure! I hope all went well.
^^^^exactly.
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Old 09-02-2019, 07:33 AM
 
1,284 posts, read 398,777 times
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If there's a next time, he should pay. You should have excepted his offer, but that ship has sailed.

And, should he ask you to come again and not offer to pay because he might assume you don't want him to now, tell him you can't afford it. Be upfront, saves trouble.
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Old 09-02-2019, 07:44 AM
 
1,464 posts, read 1,145,076 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
I would not ask him to reimburse me once I had already declined his offer to pay for it, no.

Next time I probably would say yes if he offered to pay, though.

It's great that you were able to be with him for his procedure! I hope all went well.
This
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Old 09-02-2019, 08:42 AM
 
Location: Rochester, WA
6,162 posts, read 3,427,077 times
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This is family, and if you can’t ask them for help, who can you ask? I would tell him exactly what you said here, and make it not just about the flight but about the overall impact. In hindsight the expenses of the entire trip are causing a hardship for you and can he help you out?
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Old 09-02-2019, 02:47 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
17,438 posts, read 17,734,106 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by E-Twist View Post
If there's a next time, he should pay. You should have excepted his offer, but that ship has sailed.

And, should he ask you to come again and not offer to pay because he might assume you don't want him to now, tell him you can't afford it. Be upfront, saves trouble.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Diana Holbrook View Post
This is family, and if you canít ask them for help, who can you ask? I would tell him exactly what you said here, and make it not just about the flight but about the overall impact. In hindsight the expenses of the entire trip are causing a hardship for you and can he help you out?
Depending on your financial situation vs. his financial situation. Do either of these two things.

There are many situations where an adult child makes more than their parent, especially if the parent is retired. In those cases, IMHO, it is perfectly fine for the adult child to start to take over paying for things that the parent used to pay for, such as airplane tickets, restaurant meals and groceries.
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Old 09-02-2019, 04:01 PM
 
Location: Denver CO
21,468 posts, read 12,108,695 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Diana Holbrook View Post
This is family, and if you canít ask them for help, who can you ask? I would tell him exactly what you said here, and make it not just about the flight but about the overall impact. In hindsight the expenses of the entire trip are causing a hardship for you and can he help you out?
This.

He has more money than you, and this turned out to be more of a financial impact than you realized it would be, so you'd like to accept his initial offer to pay for the tickets.

If he didn't have the money, then of course I would have politely refused the offer. But I saw my own father regularly pay for things for his own mother, because he had a lot more than she did. That's what made sense.
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Old 09-02-2019, 05:55 PM
 
4,107 posts, read 1,637,980 times
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"So, would you ask your son to reimburse for the plane ticket?"
already have.
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Old 09-02-2019, 06:13 PM
 
6,476 posts, read 10,014,103 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jakealope View Post
He offered to pay for my plane ticket, and I didn't take him up on the offer initially. It somehow seems wrong for the child to pay for the parent.



You need to let go of this "wrong for the child to pay for the parent" nonsense. He's a full-fledged adult, and behaved like it. Treat him like it. Why do you want to supress that?
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