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Old 09-10-2019, 04:12 PM
 
Location: Wherever life takes me.
6,143 posts, read 6,753,755 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MnMomma View Post
I would not have allowed my kids to play Fortnite in 4th grade (they were beyond that grade when it came out). No first-person shooters at all. It was difficult when their friends were playing Call of Duty and GTA--but they survived and are normal teens with active social lives.

The hardest moment came when my oldest didn't get invited to a close friend's birthday party because they were going to watch several Fast & Furious movies and they knew my child wouldn't be allowed to watch them. We over-compensated a bit with a great night out, but then the friend invited my kid to something special--better than the full birthday party.

I know that my kids played some of these games at friends' houses--and I'm ok with a little bit of it, but I see no reason to allow it at home (or at a friend's house that they visit very frequently).
My friends invited me over knowing I could get away with doing what I wasn’t allowed to at home.
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Old 09-11-2019, 03:14 AM
 
1,507 posts, read 854,740 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
Your guidelines sound reasonable.

I tried banning consoles from the house with my first two. Then I found out that when they went to friends' houses they were being real PITAs and trying to dominate their friends' gaming systems because they didn't have any at home.

We got a GameCube at first, which tells you how long ago this was. We had a Wii but they always preferred the Xbox. They mostly played sports games and Call of Duty throughout high school. One year they got an Assassins Creed game, but they got bored with it pretty quickly.

When my youngest came along we already had consoles in the house so banning it wasn't a question. The older brothers weren't allowed to play Call of Duty in front of him when he was a toddler/early elementary.

Now he is in high school and plays sports games and Fortnight with his friends online. Parents have to treat video games like anything else that might become a habit for your child. Banning games altogether automatically leaves your kid out of whatever a majority of his peers are doing.

Gaming is not the devil. My older boys are in their early 20s but luckily they aren't addicts. They play occasionally when they have downtime. But for adolescents, gaming can be like their social capital. It's a way for them to interact without being TOO awkward or intimate, and it's something they can have in common to talk about. Banning gaming altogether leaves your kid out of that conversation.

Like anything, it has to be approached with restraint and self-discipline in mind.

But get used to the parents who apparently let their kids do anything regardless of age. They're out there, and you just have to not associate with them if they don't share your values and approach to something like this.
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2Loud View Post
Ditto. Most of my fondest memories with my son is the two of us sitting on the couch playing co-op Halo or a Lego game together. We would get some snacks, sit beside one another and goof around. It was some serious bonding time.

Eventually he was old enough to save his money for a gaming computer. We would game while chatting in our headphones together in our Discord server playing games like Destiny and Counter Strike.

Some seriously good times with my son.
There is a sense of both moderation and cheer to your posts that gives me hope.

A lot of anything depends on balance and context.

There are many things that are irredeemably bad (drugs, huffing, unprovoked violence, et al). Video games usually aren't one of those things, especially with bonding or supervision.
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Old 09-15-2019, 03:01 AM
 
6,459 posts, read 5,538,676 times
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I remember for youngest DD's (she's now 27) 9th birthday, she was given "Grand Theft Auto" as a present from a relative. We found it inappropriate and exchanged it for "Crazy Taxi", and she was fine with it. She was really into the SIMS...she thought it was hilarious to take their toilet away so they'd pee on the floor, not let them shower, and make the kids miss the school bus every day. I have to admit, sometimes I'd join in for the laughs. She tired of video gaming once she hit her teens, though.

My 5-year-old grandson is in first grade, and plays Minecraft, but he has to earn playing privileges. Over the summer, he could only play if he did so many hours of schoolwork weekly or pages in his workbooks. His mother (my oldest DD) and dad are pretty education focused and really restrict their kids' television and video games, pushing the academics pretty hard. I guess you'd call them "Tiger Parents".
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Old Yesterday, 04:28 AM
 
Location: San Antonio
3,405 posts, read 10,058,873 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gt87 View Post
Just curious what video games you allow your children to play and what their age and restrictions are while playing?


My son is in the 4th grade and for the most part we allow him to play Fortnite, Madden, FIFA, and Rocket League. He does not have a TV in his room so he is restricted to our living room. Typically we only allow him to play on the weekends and on rare occasion during the week. We do not allow him to talk on a mic for online play and turn the outside audio off so he can't hear other online players talk to him.


It really shocks me how many kids that are his same age that play games like Call of Duty, Grand theft Auto, and so many other M-rated games. Not to mention how many kids have consoles in their bedrooms with no online restrictions.


I feel like the guidelines we set are not unreasonable and age appropriate.
My 6 year old daughter currently plays Call of Duty and Rainbow 6. I don't believe in shielding them from life/electronics that they will need to learn and be comfortable with in order to be "normal" and I don't believe that video games are linked to violence. Asia has extremely low crime, and tons of gamers of violent games. I pay no attention to the M rating.

I don't think there is any credible evidence that video games numb the mind, not any more than than other silly activities. It can help with hand eye coordination, problem solving, and other skills. We live in a world where being adept with electronics is important for life. I don't want my kids to be embarrassed when they are the only ones who don't know how to use a console. We often play as a family, and it's a fun bonding experience.

I wholeheartedly agree with no letting them play online until a bit older- this to me isn't the same as shielding them from content- those are real human beings who don't know my child.
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Old Yesterday, 08:39 AM
 
Location: Rochester NY
1,362 posts, read 876,203 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dmarie123 View Post
My 6 year old daughter currently plays Call of Duty and Rainbow 6. I don't believe in shielding them from life/electronics that they will need to learn and be comfortable with in order to be "normal" and I don't believe that video games are linked to violence. Asia has extremely low crime, and tons of gamers of violent games. I pay no attention to the M rating.

I don't think there is any credible evidence that video games numb the mind, not any more than than other silly activities. It can help with hand eye coordination, problem solving, and other skills. We live in a world where being adept with electronics is important for life. I don't want my kids to be embarrassed when they are the only ones who don't know how to use a console. We often play as a family, and it's a fun bonding experience.

I wholeheartedly agree with no letting them play online until a bit older- this to me isn't the same as shielding them from content- those are real human beings who don't know my child.
I don't believe in shielding kids from "life" but I don't really see what's to gain from allowing a 6 year old to play Call of Duty and Rainbow 6. You say it can help with hand eye coordination, problem solving, and other skills, which I do agree with. But there are plenty of other age appropriate games that can help with that. I also agree with you that playing video games can be a fun bonding experience. My son and I have a blast playing games together.


And as far as the video games are linked to violence argument. I think there are many other prominent factors that are linked to violence other than video games. Millions of kids have played violent video games and are perfectly normal.
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Old Yesterday, 04:12 PM
 
3,075 posts, read 3,091,276 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 2x3x29x41 View Post
The last thing I'd have done when raising my children (they're all in their early 20s now) was to have a game system in the house. I didn't worry about what they were playing at the homes of other children because a severe limit was built-in right there. And not having a console in our house meant they weren't obsessed with gaming in the first place.

I don't know why any serious parents have those mind-stultifying things in their homes...
My kids are also grown and we had the same outlook. They were not allowed to own video games. They could play them while out of the house, but could not bring one home.

They are extremely thankful that we had that rule and tell us so frequently. I see no reason to teach six-year-olds that killing people is fun and entertaining. There is plenty of time for gore and violence once they are less impressionable.

We also had a no-tv-after-supper-on-schoolnights rule that they are also glad that we had. There was never an argument about turning the tv off at bedtime, because, with very rare exceptions, it was off once we went to the table for dinner.

Obviously, we were in the minority, but it worked for our family.
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Old Yesterday, 06:03 PM
 
23 posts, read 8,587 times
Reputation: 82
Imagine being the parents of this kid:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=haSGAf7lvR0
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Old Today, 07:26 AM
 
2,711 posts, read 1,612,928 times
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My son is in 4th and plays fortnite. I was against it until I played it and realized how unrealistic it is. He is also very rational and mature for his age which plays a big role in my decision. Absolutely no MA games though. Otherwise we play games or read up on them first before making a decision.
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