U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 09-27-2019, 05:12 AM
 
10,928 posts, read 13,004,337 times
Reputation: 4068

Advertisements

The thread about the mall incident makes me wonder. Most onlookers would rather not get involved. We know that. Why? Because they know that parents usually freak out if they see a stranger touching their child.

It makes me wonder if in most cases where a child is abducted in a busy public place, maybe there was an onlooker who was observing and suspected what was happening, but was afraid to get involved. They decided not to because the parents would have gotten upset when they asked, "Why didn't you stop them?" Then they would look bad. So they just go away and try to tell themselves nothing unusual happened and maybe it was just their imagination.

It's a no-win situation for the onlookers.

Do you think this is possible?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 09-28-2019, 12:13 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
17,672 posts, read 17,936,654 times
Reputation: 43349
Yes, I suspect that there are situations that are "questionable" where bystanders do not get involved for fear that they are wrong. Or are worried that they might be injured for intervening.

Although, I suspect that it is a lot more common to see situations of possible child abuse/neglect (or domestic abuse) and not get involved than child or adult abductions.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-28-2019, 08:54 PM
 
Location: Bloomington IN
6,673 posts, read 8,020,855 times
Reputation: 16438
You're assuming children are abducted by strangers. Most of the time children are taken by someone they know. A child going with a known adult isn't really going to raise concerns from strangers.

I think if adults saw an actual instance of a stranger abducting a child, they would act if they recognized it as an abduction. Criminals are sneaky and take children in ways that seem pretty innocuous to a casual observer.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-28-2019, 10:32 PM
 
10,928 posts, read 13,004,337 times
Reputation: 4068
Quote:
Originally Posted by rrah View Post
You're assuming children are abducted by strangers. Most of the time children are taken by someone they know. A child going with a known adult isn't really going to raise concerns from strangers.

I think if adults saw an actual instance of a stranger abducting a child, they would act if they recognized it as an abduction. Criminals are sneaky and take children in ways that seem pretty innocuous to a casual observer.
I was thinking also of situations where a child wanders away from his family. The onlooker might notice it but choose not to do anything about it. After that point, whatever happens is unknown.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-29-2019, 01:09 AM
 
Location: San Antonio, TX
11,240 posts, read 20,982,617 times
Reputation: 26683
I've stopped kids who were by themselves and asked if they needed help finding their parents, and helped when they said yes. I would intervene if I suspected something bad was happening. I've stopped, pulled out my phone and started obviously filming when I saw someone being too rough with their kid. Most people won't do anything to help, though. They don't want to get involved.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-29-2019, 04:12 AM
 
6,648 posts, read 3,106,828 times
Reputation: 17022
If C-D is any indication by the "Nunya Business responses" to posters inquiries. I'd say its a fair conclusion that when abductions do transpire in a "public" area...few would think twice to interject themselves . Most are busy typing into their phones or living in their own cyber world.

I recall the "stranger- danger" platform being taught in our community civics building. Some of those kids really belted out some great yells!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-29-2019, 08:58 AM
 
10,928 posts, read 13,004,337 times
Reputation: 4068
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hedgehog_Mom View Post
I've stopped kids who were by themselves and asked if they needed help finding their parents, and helped when they said yes. I would intervene if I suspected something bad was happening. I've stopped, pulled out my phone and started obviously filming when I saw someone being too rough with their kid. Most people won't do anything to help, though. They don't want to get involved.
I don't think most people would do this.

The last time I remember intervening was at a restaurant in a sketchy part of town. I noticed a small child at the next table walking out the door but the family was talking and didn't notice. I said something to one of them and eventually someone from their table got up to get the child.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-29-2019, 09:11 AM
 
Location: San Diego
1,269 posts, read 461,413 times
Reputation: 2621
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nov3 View Post
If C-D is any indication by the "Nunya Business responses" to posters inquiries. I'd say its a fair conclusion that when abductions do transpire in a "public" area...few would think twice to interject themselves . Most are busy typing into their phones or living in their own cyber world.

I recall the "stranger- danger" platform being taught in our community civics building. Some of those kids really belted out some great yells!
More like "none of my business." Frankly, I'm not kid friendly and they are seriously in my "blind spot".
I would think folks with kids would be more aware/atuned.

Now if a dog is in trouble? I'm there. My yorkie would never forgive me.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-29-2019, 12:53 PM
 
2,076 posts, read 1,338,880 times
Reputation: 10088
I've watched those "what would you do" type videos before where they set up experiments like this. The vast majority of people walking by a kid yelling help while a person yanks them down the street or into a car do not even bother to look up at the commotion.

People COULD stop a lot of crime and horrible things from happening... if they cared enough.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-29-2019, 05:51 PM
 
4,409 posts, read 1,775,859 times
Reputation: 8737
well, yes they would.
essentially, most crimes could.

however...the majority of those onlookers would have been wrong.
seeing without hearing and without knowing would result in "chicken little syndrome".
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top