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Old 11-09-2019, 09:42 AM
 
23,010 posts, read 17,627,519 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by confusedparent1 View Post
You probably yelled at him too much when he was little.
Why would you say something like that? I wasn’t in my head and a loner because I got yelled at, it’s just how God made me. Since when is introversion created by being yelled at? Do you have studies to back that up?
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Old 11-09-2019, 12:20 PM
 
4,021 posts, read 2,379,247 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ocnjgirl View Post
Why would you say something like that? I wasn’t in my head and a loner because I got yelled at, it’s just how God made me. Since when is introversion created by being yelled at? Do you have studies to back that up?
Actually, I can personally say that being yelled at often as a child directly affects how I handle dealing with people as an adult. I avoid confrontation and if yelled at, I will stand and say nothing. My childhood taught me that makes it stop quicker. My childhood also taught me that staying under the radar keep me out of the eyesight of school bullies (I went to a small school).

Read into that what you may.
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Old 11-09-2019, 01:38 PM
 
23,010 posts, read 17,627,519 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WouldLoveTo View Post
Actually, I can personally say that being yelled at often as a child directly affects how I handle dealing with people as an adult. I avoid confrontation and if yelled at, I will stand and say nothing. My childhood taught me that makes it stop quicker. My childhood also taught me that staying under the radar keep me out of the eyesight of school bullies (I went to a small school).

Read into that what you may.
I only read into that that you as an individual took on certain personality traits because you had an verbally abusive childhood. I would certainly never read into it that it’s justified to accuse OP of being at fault for her sons introversion.Every kid who is an introvert was not abused or yelled at though, I think that’s ridiculous stretch to make. Specially in this case, where OP states that both her and her husband are also introverts. I didn’t say thing about him avoiding confrontation just that he keeps to himself and prefers one friend at a time and that one friend has moved away. I was born a loner, I wasn’t turned into one.
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Old 11-09-2019, 03:07 PM
 
4,021 posts, read 2,379,247 times
Reputation: 4514
Quote:
Originally Posted by ocnjgirl View Post
I only read into that that you as an individual took on certain personality traits because you had an verbally abusive childhood. I would certainly never read into it that it’s justified to accuse OP of being at fault for her sons introversion.Every kid who is an introvert was not abused or yelled at though, I think that’s ridiculous stretch to make. Specially in this case, where OP states that both her and her husband are also introverts. I didn’t say thing about him avoiding confrontation just that he keeps to himself and prefers one friend at a time and that one friend has moved away. I was born a loner, I wasn’t turned into one.
I'll buy that. I was always able to play on my own as a child, more so than my siblings were. So I have those traits as well.

I'm just saying there is a definite correlation in the personality/self preservation area for me as well.
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Old 11-09-2019, 03:32 PM
 
Location: Texas
11,702 posts, read 4,451,773 times
Reputation: 22707
Quote:
Originally Posted by confusedparent1 View Post
You probably yelled at him too much when he was little.
Really? What makes you think that yelling at him too much when he was little, caused him to become a loner? Can you explain?
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Old 11-09-2019, 05:11 PM
 
23,010 posts, read 17,627,519 times
Reputation: 42495
Quote:
Originally Posted by WouldLoveTo View Post
I'll buy that. I was always able to play on my own as a child, more so than my siblings were. So I have those traits as well.

I'm just saying there is a definite correlation in the personality/self preservation area for me as well.

That may be. What I really objected to was the other posters "You probably yelled at him too much". There is no basis to make such an accusation and I can't imagine what she was hoping to accomplish with that post.
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Old 11-09-2019, 06:41 PM
 
4,021 posts, read 2,379,247 times
Reputation: 4514
Quote:
Originally Posted by ocnjgirl View Post
That may be. What I really objected to was the other posters "You probably yelled at him too much". There is no basis to make such an accusation and I can't imagine what she was hoping to accomplish with that post.
I get it!
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Old 11-19-2019, 07:11 AM
 
Location: USA
56 posts, read 3,761 times
Reputation: 42
Give your time to your child don't allow to roam alone at any place, always be with him so that they can come close to you don't left with you housekeepers, because by staying with them he also thinks whatever they see.
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Old Today, 12:21 AM
 
51 posts, read 2,990 times
Reputation: 30
My daughter was an introvert and no friends in school. She only had one friend her cousin in the family. But as she has grown up she is making friends and socializing too. I noticed a great change in her social behaviour after she turned 11 before that i was sick worried about her. It ok that you are worried but i think as he grow up he will also change his social behaviour some kids are just very choosey about their friendships.
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Old Today, 10:51 AM
 
12,930 posts, read 15,798,259 times
Reputation: 14974
Quote:
Originally Posted by DairyGodmother View Post

I"m just not sure if it's an issue or not. People around here take their children so seriously to an extreme, and I never wanted to be that parent but maybe it's creeping in.
I don't think it's an issue...unless you allow it to creep in.
Lots of very intelligent ( and happy and content) people were loners when young.
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