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Old 11-20-2019, 07:15 AM
 
74 posts, read 44,836 times
Reputation: 38

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I know it's not possible to know a very accurate answer to my title considering you don't know him or me. When I was younger I remember him saying I'm bitter. My mom talked right after he said that so he didn't say anything else about that statement nor did I. I think he said that because I was very quiet and introverted, always in my room.

Maybe to him a person that's very secluded from other people means they might be bitter?. I don't know what was the point of him saying that, what was it suppose to accomplish?. You can take that statement to mean different things. Is it meant to be taken as him being mean to me. Does it mean I should stop being bitter whatever that means. Why say that and not elaborate on what your trying to say and what you mean by that statement.
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Old 11-20-2019, 07:24 AM
 
1,313 posts, read 871,098 times
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Can’t say since you only remember a small fragment of that moment. The person you should ask is your stepdad or mother. Obviously you were a kid and maybe at that moment you were showing a little attitude or he was joking.
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Old 11-20-2019, 08:47 AM
 
Location: Wisconsin
2,820 posts, read 1,809,637 times
Reputation: 9060
There is such a thing as projection. Was your stepdad a bitter person? He might have been projecting his own feelings onto you. Most likely it had nothing to do with who you really were at the time, and for sure it doesn't need to have any more weight than you yourself give it at this point in your life.
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Old 11-20-2019, 09:09 AM
 
5,915 posts, read 2,600,385 times
Reputation: 16457
He said it ONCE?
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Old 11-20-2019, 09:14 AM
 
4,433 posts, read 2,988,253 times
Reputation: 8690
You actually are being bitter now, hanging on to something you think might have been negative.

Forget about it, move on.
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Old 11-20-2019, 11:49 AM
 
74 posts, read 44,836 times
Reputation: 38
Quote:
Originally Posted by KaraG View Post
You actually are being bitter now, hanging on to something you think might have been negative.

Forget about it, move on.
It's not that important but I do want to know if to ignore him or not, should I like him or not.
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Old 11-20-2019, 11:55 AM
 
4,433 posts, read 2,988,253 times
Reputation: 8690
Quote:
Originally Posted by yologuy01 View Post
It's not that important but I do want to know if to ignore him or not, should I like him or not.
You should not ignore him or not like him for one statement from the past. Let it go.
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Old 11-20-2019, 12:25 PM
 
20 posts, read 5,445 times
Reputation: 50
Whether you like him or not should not depend on one statement. What does he do on a daily basis? Provide for you? Help you when you need? Give U space when need space? Is he a reasonably decent guy? Does he physically abuse you? Does he constantly verbally abuse you? If one comment like that is the worst that's ever happened, you may be overthinking and obsessing. NBD, people, especially young ones do that. Eventually you gain perspective and realize little things are little things. Basically if he's a reasonably decent guy who generally takes care of the family then respect and appreciate him for that. Life is not black and white. You don't have to rate him as father of the year or satan himself. Most humans are in between.

As far as staying in your room, before there was internet families grew up more interactive - one TV everyone hung out in the FAMILY ROOM watching and enjoying (or not) together. It's hard for us older folks to digest how kids barricade themselves up in their rooms these days like they do cuz life wasn't like that for us - so keep that in mind. He may to some extent view millennial cave dwelling as some sort of resentful behavior. I admit I often think similar things about my kids - "after all I do for you - all the work I do and money I spend and as nice as I try to be and all I get is a kid who fears and hates me and hides out in the bedroom?!!" This definitely goes through my head - but I myself step back and rethink that - "who am I to judge? I wasn't a perfect teen either. Made my mistakes - different ones, but mistakes just the same - had my struggles - who am I to judge?"

My suggestion. Do a few little things to show a lil love and reach out a little to see the reaction. It's a nice little test you can do on people. Do something nice, see if u get a positive reaction. Do it twice. Three times over the course of time. See what happens. It will help you go in the right direction.
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Old 11-20-2019, 01:28 PM
 
1,137 posts, read 406,119 times
Reputation: 3434
Quote:
Originally Posted by KaraG View Post
You should not ignore him or not like him for one statement from the past. Let it go.
Can't rep you again, but both of your comments were right on the money.
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Old 11-20-2019, 04:49 PM
 
Location: California
1,920 posts, read 558,509 times
Reputation: 3742
Why are you thinking about this now when it was long ago? Did something happen recently that triggered this memory?
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