Overweight child...advice please (custody, meal plan, have to tell, divorced)

[puntin]

first of all...you say that your son is 68 lbs and 50"...is that really overweight? My daughter is about that size, although she is almost 9! She is not even close to overweight. I would be more concerned about his diet and activity level, which many here have already given you some great suggestions, so I won't bore you with repeating it

[mlammons]

I want to thank all of you for the great suggestions and advice.

At this point I do feel like my son is becoming overweight (I'm not one of these people that thinks 5 extra lbs is overweight either). I think this because he is beginning to look quite chubby with his belly hanging over his pants, a little bit of a double chin etc. I am really just concerned about his health. The fact that all he wants is sweets now and he wants to eat constantly (literally) has me worried. He has always been a big, tall boy and is quite the weed when it comes to growth. I just want to make sure he doesn't start bad eating habits now. I want him to be healthy and happy just like all parents.

I am going to begin talking to him about healthy choices and WHY they are healthy choices as well as purchasing some DVD's on the subject.

He is involved in a couple of organized sports programs but I am going to begin taking him to our local community center and playing basketball with him several days/wk. I'm also going to incorporate more walking/jogging into our daily lives. I also really like the idea of leaving veggies out where he can reach them at all times. And I think that if I begin sending snacks/prepared meals with him to his Dad's then he would use them. His dad doesn't want to do too much work in the cooking arena and he will probably do whatever is easiest.

Again, thanks to everyone!

[kimba01]

Good luck, you are on the right track!!!

[fierce_flawless]

Check out this link on sugar craving and yeast overgrowth. I don't purport to know everything about this, I am in fact just researching it myself... but it talks about how someone can have an overgrowth of yeast in their body which can cause intense carb and sugar cravings.... and I have experienced this. The more sugar I consume, the more I MUST have. I have put myself on a very strict reduction of sugar here in the past couple days to see if there's any truth to it (going to give it a good month)...

anyway just food for thought. Here's the link.

Crave Sweets? On the Weight & Mood Roller Coaster? Perhaps It&#39s More Than You Think!

[mlammons]

fierce- thank you very much, I will definitly check it out.

[sskkc]

50" and 68 lbs seems overweight to me, but that's when I compare my 5 yo daughter... 48" and 41 lbs. She's a little thing, but not underweight. Take into consideration the boy/girl factor, and he's still a bit big.

I agree that at this age, activity level and healthy eating habits are the key. As a boy, he's probably just one good growth spurt from normal!

You've got lots of good advice here... I hope things go well!

Edited to add:

I went ahead and googled a children's BMI calculator.

A male who is 6, 50" and 68 lbs is "at risk", as is the 9 yo female.
A female who is 5, 48" and 41 lbs is "underweight"

Just a little food for thought. I never thought of my daughter as "underweight", but I do know she's a picky eater. Hmmm... I'll have to think on this!

[NCyank]

It seems that you could work with your son at home, teaching him about healthy eating and appropriate snacking and send his meals with him to his dad's, or 2 out of the three days if you want to compromise. I don't see where the conflict is. If dad wants to eat pizza and cheetos for dinner DS has a chicken taco salad and fruit cup. He needs to LEARN not to eat the junk even if it is readily available. Pack his lunches for school so he has more opportunities to eat the foods you have prepared so the only time won't be at his dad's. Have the pediatrician to back you up even if dad won't. Even better if the pediatrician is a man, have him do a few phone consultations with your DS between regular visits to see how he is doing.

[mlammons]

Originally Posted by NCyank

It seems that you could work with your son at home, teaching him about healthy eating and appropriate snacking and send his meals with him to his dad's, or 2 out of the three days if you want to compromise. I don't see where the conflict is. If dad wants to eat pizza and cheetos for dinner DS has a chicken taco salad and fruit cup. He needs to LEARN not to eat the junk even if it is readily available. Pack his lunches for school so he has more opportunities to eat the foods you have prepared so the only time won't be at his dad's. Have the pediatrician to back you up even if dad won't. Even better if the pediatrician is a man, have him do a few phone consultations with your DS between regular visits to see how he is doing.

It seems unrealistic to me to expect a young child to eat a chx taco salad while the parent eats pizza and cheetos (which really is something my ex would eat for dinner). And how do you expect a 5 year old (almost 5 - he will be in a month and a half) to NOT eat the junk when his dad is eating in in front of him AND allowing him to have it? I just don't see it happening, not at this age at least.

Did you read the previous posts?

[NCyank]

Originally Posted by mlammons

It seems unrealistic to me to expect a young child to eat a chx taco salad while the parent eats pizza and cheetos (which really is something my ex would eat for dinner). And how do you expect a 5 year old (almost 5 - he will be in a month and a half) to NOT eat the junk when his dad is eating in in front of him AND allowing him to have it? I just don't see it happening, not at this age at least.

Did you read the previous posts?

Yes, I did read them all. I expect my kids to follow my instructions and if I pack them a meal they should eat it. This may take some time and training at your home to fully accomplish and I even suggested a compromise. 2 of the 3 days he eats what you pack and 1 day he gets to eat whatever his dad serves up. Does he not follow your instructions usually? If not then it is time to get started!! What do you expect him to do at school if all the kids eat junk food, just join them or eat what you pack for him?

[Stratford, Ct. Resident]

Originally Posted by mlammons

It seems unrealistic to me to expect a young child to eat a chx taco salad while the parent eats pizza and cheetos (which really is something my ex would eat for dinner). And how do you expect a 5 year old (almost 5 - he will be in a month and a half) to NOT eat the junk when his dad is eating in in front of him AND allowing him to have it? I just don't see it happening, not at this age at least.

Did you read the previous posts?

Exactly.