Do women feel compelled to love kids? Is their something wrong with women who have little interest in children? (party, newborn)

[Murph77]

I desperately need to know if anyone else feels the same way about this, or if it’s just my cynical nature getting the best of me. I think some woman exaggerate their love of children so that they seem more like the perfect woman. I feel like society says that woman must love kids and if they love kids, they are better people, better women. I have a friend who swoons over kids to such an extent that is nauseating and I swear that it’s part show. I mean there is no doubt in my mind that she likes kids and she wants them, more than anything I know she wants them. But I have a hunch that she feels the need to display her love for them at parties so much partly because she wants people to know how much she loves them and what a great mother she would be. But if that’s how you feel, why do they care if other people know it? Especially other people at a party? I remember at this one party, my friend was completely drunk and would not stop playing with the host’s 2 year old nephew. In front of a bunch of our friends at the party, she was just drunk and playing, carrying the kid around, having his sit on her lap, being really loud talking to him. I like to think that if it were my kid, I would ask the drunken party guest to get off my child! But the mother was in the other room and we were out in the backyard. I used to think that it was a display for her fiancé / now husband, so he could see what a wonderful mother she would be, but now, I think it’s a show for the other girls too. Why do people think that we should know how much they love kids. Do they think that we’ll think more highly of them? At another party, our of our friends brought her newborn. She was like shaking, “let me hold the baby!”. Then when she’s hold her (surrounded by a bunch of our friends) she kept saying “Oh my god, I love her, love her!”. I felt like saying, “Would you relax and stop putting on a damn show for everyone? You like kids, we get it!”

[jamesandveybe]

Women who don't love their kids is not normal, although immediately after birth for a short time it is not uncommon.

[Vagabond]

I think a lot of women who have kids now, wish they could have gone back in time and either kept their legs closed or had an abortion. There are so many women that have kids out of guilt or fear vs actually deciding they want them, and as controversial as it may be, I do believe the theory that America's high crime rate would be less if so many unwanted kids were not born. What else can you expect from a loveless existence but murder and rage?

I think it's normal for a first time mother to have depression and moments of regret because she realizes her freedom is now gone forever.

[jamesandveybe]

Originally Posted by Vagabond

I think a lot of women who have kids now, wish they could have gone back in time and either kept their legs closed or had an abortion.

I truly hope you are mistaken, I don't want to think about any woman killing their own child.

[nuala]

I think the OP doesn't like women *showing off* their *motherly disposition* for the onlookers' sake, not actually mothers who do love their kids (the title of this thread confuses the two though).

[Vagabond]

I truly hope you are mistaken, I don't want to think about any woman killing their own child.

You live in a fantasy world where people don't tell the truth. If so, don't spend too much time on the internet, your faith in mankind will dissolve like an ice cube on a skillet.

[sincere1782]

i have a cousin like that. she doesn't have any kids, because she told me she had an abortion, but she exaggerates and acts really silly with my daughter and any other baby she sees. I think its just her personality. Doesn't bother me, i just laugh at her.

[jamesandveybe]

Originally Posted by Vagabond

You live in a fantasy world where people don't tell the truth. If so, don't spend too much time on the internet, your faith in mankind will dissolve like an ice cube on a skillet.

No, my faith in womankind.

[LeafsFan85]

Originally Posted by Vagabond

I think it's normal for a first time mother to have depression and moments of regret because she realizes her freedom is now gone forever.

I think any Women/Men that even analyzed this though after the baby is born shouldn't have kid at all.
Afterall once the kid is born is all about the baby, you don't have time or energy to think about you, 24/7 is all about the baby and you do it because you want to do it not because you have to do it.

Of couse you can joke about your freedom is gone at a social gathering, but you wouldn't trade a night at a club for a night with your kid.

[Murph77]

Thanks nuala. You are absolutely right. I do not mean women with children. I mean young women who do not yet have children. I just feel like society expects woman to fall over themselves when kids are around and some woman, like my friend, play right into this. Sorry for the confusion. I'm new to this.