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Thanks. I get it. But it's not the fundraiser I'm placing the importance on...just the family thing. It doesn't matter, I'll never ask her again, nor will I participate in hers.
Thanks again everyone for the imput.
So then may I suggest you at the very least speak to her about your anger over the matter in order to preserve the relationship? It would be a shame to have you harbor such feelings and then it causing great strain between you two in the future, with her likely having no clue you even felt this way to begin with.
So then may I suggest you at the very least speak to her about your anger over the matter in order to preserve the relationship? It would be a shame to have you harbor such feelings and then it causing great strain between you two in the future, with her likely having no clue you even felt this way to begin with.
Yes, I'm still too angry about it now to discuss it with her and she heading off on a two week vacation so I'll see how I feel after that.
I would be upset, too. I think it would of been nicer of her to tell your son "Sorry, I can't help out right now" or something else a little vague but nice. Then, if she truly doesn't want to purchase anything from him now or in the future, she should have a conversation with you in private about it. Its hard enough for most children to get up the nerve to sell things without relatives being a little harsh about it. And it might just be that she is saddled with buying stuff from her own children's fundraisers, and maybe she is hit up by neighbors and friends in her own town and found it easier to say no to a relative in another town. Now, a rational person would explain this to the mother.... Perhaps a little dialogue would be helpful, just to find out if your anger is misplaced or not. It's probably not, but you never know.
I agree crazyme4878. And if she didn't want to ever be asked to purchase anything from us, all she had to do was not open it up and ask us to purchase from her. I am SO glad I didn't have my son call her.
For years, I bought something from each of my neices and nephews, cousin's kids, etc. Now that I have children, none of them have reciprocated. It's annoying, and the last time they approached me, I just told them that I don't "do" those things anymore. After the first year my son was in school (K), we decided not even to approach family and friends with fundraisers. We pay the minimum or donate a check instead. The school or organization makes more $$ with a donation anyway. For instance, Entertainment Books (which we use for the first week then lose) - I found out that the school only makes $7 per $30 book. So, instead of buying the books, I donate $10 per kid and the school makes out better and it costs me less.
The only exception to this is Scout's stuff. My ds sells the popcorn and surprisingly a lot of folks buy it (though we don't approach family - they're all long distance). My dd will start selling GS Cookies this year. Everyone loves GS Cookies!
After being through the scout popcorn debacle a few times we've decided to never participate in fundrasers again. I agree with the above posters, I'd rather pay the full fees or a little more and not have to put immature people (both parents and children) at each others throats just so a national org can make money. I saw how much went to the local troop, how much was paid for mediocre popcorn to the vendor and how much went to the national (for nothing but paying saleries) and then how it turned friends into bitter rivals and sometimes enemies. The only ones who really make out are the national and the popcorn vendor IMO.
I've seen kids go into other troop memebers own neighborhoods and sell just to get ahead and the parents are just as proud as peacocks that they're little tommy sold more by stepping over the bodys of his little friends, not very scout like IMO, in fact the whole fundraiser thing goes against most of the scout principles IMO anyway.
So just to clarify, even if I had bought things from your kids to support them, you would still tell my child no?
Yes, if it was the same product my kids sell. Our kids' old school had a large magazine drive in the fall, my sister's kids' school had one in the spring. We didn't buy magazines from them, nor did they buy from us-kind of silly I think. We have purchased other products, girl scout cookies, etc. from them though.
As someone who has worked for numerous non-profits and clubs, there are good fundraisers and bad fundraisers.
Good fundraisers:
1) Have specific goal, such as new equipment, a reduction in fees, a trip/visitor, etc.
2)provide something of value, and the supplier company generally receives less profit on the items sold. One example is Fannie May candy, where customers actually get it for less than retail.
Bad fundraisers:
1) Don't have a specific goal
2) Have kids selling junk at high prices
3) Have prize sheets for levels of participation. These are all signs that a middleman is collecting the lion's share of the revenue.
I worked very hard with one school to change their ways on fundraisers, fromm bad to good. You hear it from every parent - very few people want to buy $10 a roll wrapping paper, or plastic "taco holders" for $5. But bring families something that of high quality, saves you time or effort, or some kind of fun experience at low price, and they will jump on board. I was amazed at how hard it was to convince the school office that "less was more" just focus on a few good fundraisers and don't overwhelm people with so many catalogs.
How do you react if your child is having a fundraiser and a relative turns him down flat?
We have no relatives where we live and we also only have one neighbor. My son is doing a fundraiser for a sports team he is on and he's not allowed to go door to door. I wouldn't let him anyway, but we are only allowed to sell to neighbors and relatives, etc. This is for charity only and he gets no prizes.
I had my son send an e-mail to a relative out of state and she responded saying that her kids already sell that product at their school so she won't be able to buy from him. We have bought things we didn't need from her kids for fundraisers so I thought for sure, she would buy one small inexpensive thing. I did not contact any relatives who probably have had fundraisers of their own and never asked us.
I am totally insulted that she turned down my son flat. I have not said anything and probably won't, but I will NEVER EVER buy anything from her kids again.
I thought family was supposed to support each other with these types of things. Am I wrong to think she could have supported my son with a small gesture?
Just because you bought from her kids don't expect her to buy from your kids, esp. if her kids are selling the same thing!
I detest school fundraisers. Overpriced crap you can buy at any retail location.
Quote:
Originally Posted by tamitrail
It is for candles....and actually I think they are quite nice and plan on buying them for myself.
Whether or not candles are junk is a matter of opinion.
How many candles do people need? I've got about 10 half used candles in the house right now, the last thing I'd do is buy more.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jimj
After being through the scout popcorn debacle a few times we've decided to never participate in fundrasers again. I agree with the above posters, I'd rather pay the full fees or a little more and not have to put immature people (both parents and children) at each others throats just so a national org can make money. I saw how much went to the local troop, how much was paid for mediocre popcorn to the vendor and how much went to the national (for nothing but paying saleries) and then how it turned friends into bitter rivals and sometimes enemies. The only ones who really make out are the national and the popcorn vendor IMO.
I've seen kids go into other troop memebers own neighborhoods and sell just to get ahead and the parents are just as proud as peacocks that they're little tommy sold more by stepping over the bodys of his little friends, not very scout like IMO, in fact the whole fundraiser thing goes against most of the scout principles IMO anyway.
I agree, the scout popcorn fundraiser is over the top. The popcorn was ridiculously expensive. The cheapest thing on there was $17 for a 15 pack of microwave popcorn. Then the prices were up to $45 and more.
There was no way I was peddling that crap. It's beyond the limit of what we can reasonably ask people to spend.
I will note that the scouts get 70% of the price of the popcorn, so anyone that has bought the popcorn should know that it is a worthy fundraiser, if you've got the money to shell out $45 for popcorn.
The point is, this is basically a donation to the organization w/ a small unworthy gift attached.
I'd much prefer kids to ask for a donation and give me a tax deductible receipt and skip the crap altogether.
for me to buy that $45 popcorn, my DH has to make about $70. So when you think of it that way, $70 for popcorn is ridiculous, just so the scouts can get $32.
Cost=$70 Benefit=$32 and popcorn I don't want in the first place. Something wrong with this statement!
for me to buy that $45 popcorn, my DH has to make about $70. So when you think of it that way, $70 for popcorn is ridiculous, just so the scouts can get $32.
Cost=$70 Benefit=$32 and popcorn I don't want in the first place. Something wrong with this statement!
Hey now....you're not supposed to worry about the math. After all, it's for the children....
NCyank<----who recently purchased her annual 2 boxes of GS cookies from the kid down the street.
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I'll think about it...
