Children's Fundraising (child care, support, parents, girl) - Children, problems, school, daycare, behavior, age, teenagers, infants - City-Data Forum

tamitrail · 08-18-2008, 06:45 AM

How do you react if your child is having a fundraiser and a relative turns him down flat?

We have no relatives where we live and we also only have one neighbor. My son is doing a fundraiser for a sports team he is on and he's not allowed to go door to door. I wouldn't let him anyway, but we are only allowed to sell to neighbors and relatives, etc. This is for charity only and he gets no prizes.

I had my son send an e-mail to a relative out of state and she responded saying that her kids already sell that product at their school so she won't be able to buy from him. We have bought things we didn't need from her kids for fundraisers so I thought for sure, she would buy one small inexpensive thing. I did not contact any relatives who probably have had fundraisers of their own and never asked us.

I am totally insulted that she turned down my son flat. I have not said anything and probably won't, but I will NEVER EVER buy anything from her kids again.

I thought family was supposed to support each other with these types of things. Am I wrong to think she could have supported my son with a small gesture?

golfgal · 08-18-2008, 06:50 AM

I wouldn't do anything and I wouldn't get upset either. I don't expect relatives to buy things at all and especially things their own kids sell. It really isn't a big deal.

Just an FYI, they ALWAYS tell kids not to go door to door for liability reasons. They can certainly do it and you can go along. You can ask coworkers, etc. too.

I have to say that if this is for a club sports team I wouldn't buy anything from you. If you pay a fee for your child to be on the team they shouldn't have to fund raise. If it is a school team, that is different.

tamitrail · 08-18-2008, 07:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by golfgal

I wouldn't do anything and I wouldn't get upset either. I don't expect relatives to buy things at all and especially things their own kids sell. It really isn't a big deal.

Just an FYI, they ALWAYS tell kids not to go door to door for liability reasons. They can certainly do it and you can go along. You can ask coworkers, etc. too.

I have to say that if this is for a club sports team I wouldn't buy anything from you. If you pay a fee for your child to be on the team they shouldn't have to fund raise. If it is a school team, that is different.

So just to clarify, even if I had bought things from your kids to support them, you would still tell my child no?

jkcoop · 08-18-2008, 07:35 AM

I will have to say, I hate the whole fundraising thing. For me, I would not have bought from anyone in the first place, so there would be no tit for tat when my son had to fund raise. My philosophy is that if someone has kids, they are having to do it, we are having to do it, just take the money and give it to my child's thing rather than have to keep track of who I supported and who I didn't.

I would rather give a $50 check to whatever program is fund raising then ask anyone to buy stuff or me having to buy stuff. And let's face it - it's usually stuff no one wants.

To make things worse, if it's for an extra curricular program my son is involved in - like sports (he was on a non profit ski team), we always just wrote a bigger check. Not many people feel the need to donate to that. My husband was on the board of directors for it for years and finally they raised the fees enough to not have to do so much fund raising. Wish all organizations would do that.

NCyank · 08-18-2008, 07:45 AM

I don't do fund raisers so I may not have an answer you like. I think such things are ridiculous in general. If your kid wants to play sports just pay for it. If it is for a charity make a donation. Why involve a high priced middle man and become a bother to friends, family and neighbors selling stuff that most people don't want or need?

If you choose to buy this stuff from other kids then that is your choice. It doesn't obligate them to buy from your kid. JM2¢

tamitrail · 08-18-2008, 07:47 AM

Yes, jkcoop, I do agree and that's my point. I have not asked anyone in the past. We usually just buy ourselves or write a check. No one except this one relative asks us to buy anything for their fundraisers. It's really not the point that they won't buy anything that is getting me. It's the point that they felt the need to ask us...we helped them out and they don't care enough to return the favor for my child. It's more of the rejection of my son that's insulting to me.

Edit: And BTW, thanks for all of your point of views. It's not going to change my annoyance at this relative at all, but it's nice to see other people's opinions.

One more edit: I gues I should have added that I felt this relative opened the door for these types of things because they have approached us several times.

jkcoop · 08-18-2008, 08:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tamitrail

Yes, jkcoop, I do agree and that's my point. I have not asked anyone in the past. We usually just buy ourselves or write a check. No one except this one relative asks us to buy anything for their fundraisers. It's really not the point that they won't buy anything that is getting me. It's the point that they felt the need to ask us...we helped them out and they don't care enough to return the favor for my child. It's more of the rejection of my son that's insulting to me.

Edit: And BTW, thanks for all of your point of views. It's not going to change my annoyance at this relative at all, but it's nice to see other people's opinions.

One more edit: I gues I should have added that I felt this relative opened the door for these types of things because they have approached us several times.

Try not to take it too personally - but don't ever donate to their stuff again either! I can see why you are a bit annoyed. She's not rejecting your son - she's just.....rude in how she went about saying no.

sskkc · 08-18-2008, 08:29 AM

For years, I bought something from each of my neices and nephews, cousin's kids, etc. Now that I have children, none of them have reciprocated. It's annoying, and the last time they approached me, I just told them that I don't "do" those things anymore. After the first year my son was in school (K), we decided not even to approach family and friends with fundraisers. We pay the minimum or donate a check instead. The school or organization makes more $$ with a donation anyway. For instance, Entertainment Books (which we use for the first week then lose) - I found out that the school only makes $7 per $30 book. So, instead of buying the books, I donate $10 per kid and the school makes out better and it costs me less.

The only exception to this is Scout's stuff. My ds sells the popcorn and surprisingly a lot of folks buy it (though we don't approach family - they're all long distance). My dd will start selling GS Cookies this year. Everyone loves GS Cookies!

NCyank · 08-18-2008, 08:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sskkc

My dd will start selling GS Cookies this year. Everyone loves GS Cookies!

This is the one area I make an exception. I do buy a few boxes from our neighbor girl each year but it has nothing to do with her (personally) and everything to do with my weakness for Thin Mints and Samoas.

hypocore · 08-18-2008, 08:59 AM

I wouldn't have any problem with anyone, relative or not, who said their own kids sell/sold that same thing so they wouldn't be able to buy from my child's fundraiser at that time.
I would feel the same way. I wouldn't want to buy something from someone else that my own child was selling or had just sold. It's just not a big deal. There will be more fundraisers.

I was in charge of fundraising in a child care setting where the age of the kids meant all the fundraising was done by the parents and I learned lots of things.

Did you know that about 20% of the kids/parents who do fundraisers bring in about 80% of the total sold? Everyone else brings in very little each or nothing at all. Those in charge expect this to be the case and typically don't take issue with that 80%.

Fundraisers can earn in profit from as little as 5% to as large as 100% of the total sales, averaging around 40% profit.

Those who have their own business often donate 100% profits and pretty much do all the work for you, though the dollar amount is typically not high.

Companies who offer catalog items of variety typically offer 40-50% profit and do most of the work for you. Dollar amounts here can reach the tens of thousands when you have a large body selling.

Things such as candy, cookie dough, magazine subscriptions typically offer 30% or less profit. This can bring in decent money when done by large groups, yet it takes more work by the person doing the selling.

Specialty items such as coupon books, school spirit items, cookbooks etc., will bring in varying amounts of profit depending on their content and variety.

I'm curious as to what your fundraising item was.....