Kicking a 18 yo child out (babysitting, baby, insurance, high school)

[beachmel]

Originally Posted by AnonChick

According to you Margritte, the only option would be homelessness. That's what prompted all these responses in the first place. Because you claimed that telling an adult of 18 years of age that he or she needs to get out of your home now, would mean that person is a homeless child.

That person isn't a child..and she'd only be homeless if she chose to insulate herself from the rest of the world growing up - rejecting every piece of data about "what it's like to live as an independent adult" from school, from peers, from older brothers and sisters of herself or her friends, from teachers, from "home economics" classes (if they still teach that..), from Hallmark movies on TV, from the internet, from the newspapers..

If that girl didn't pay attention to all of that, then yeah she might end up homeless. But if she didn't pay attention to any of it, then homelessness is the least of her worries. Because even if she had a home to go to, she wouldn't have a clue as to what to do with it.

Yep, those are the kinds of kids who have no options when they get kicked out. They didn't have to listen to anyone when they were teens. They didn't treat anyone decently when they were teens. They had no one's respect, because they didn't have any respect for anyone else. They knew it all, therefore they didn't learn anything....and when they find themselves homeless.....they truly are alone and too stubborn to admit they're wrong and too prideful to ask for help. After all, someone might tell them what they should and should not do! I'm sorry, it's difficult to feel sorry for someone who won't listen to straight out good advice and admit they're wrong.

[AnonChick]

If they're not homeless when their mom kicks them out at 18, they'd be homeless when mom dies and they discover they never learned how to pay the mortgage. Personally I'd rather learn the lesson while I'm young enough to improve my lot in life. Thankfully, I paid attention to my environment and those people who did succeed, who availed themselves to me while I was growing up.

[Magritte25]

Originally Posted by AnonChick

According to you Margritte, the only option would be homelessness. That's what prompted all these responses in the first place. Because you claimed that telling an adult of 18 years of age that he or she needs to get out of your home now, would mean that person is a homeless child.

That person isn't a child..and she'd only be homeless if she chose to insulate herself from the rest of the world growing up - rejecting every piece of data about "what it's like to live as an independent adult" from school, from peers, from older brothers and sisters of herself or her friends, from teachers, from "home economics" classes (if they still teach that..), from Hallmark movies on TV, from the internet, from the newspapers..

If that girl didn't pay attention to all of that, then yeah she might end up homeless. But if she didn't pay attention to any of it, then homelessness is the least of her worries. Because even if she had a home to go to, she wouldn't have a clue as to what to do with it.

Kicking someone out in a day's worth of time without any notice or time to prepare WILL lead to homelessness.

[AnonChick]

Well yes, but what in the sam hill does that have to do with this thread? Who's kicking someone out in a day's time without any notice or time? And no, it won't lead to homelessness if you've got a network built up of support. But it's irrelevent because it has nothing to do with anything.

[Magritte25]

Originally Posted by AnonChick

Well yes, but what in the sam hill does that have to do with this thread? Who's kicking someone out in a day's time without any notice or time? And no, it won't lead to homelessness if you've got a network built up of support. But it's irrelevent because it has nothing to do with anything.

I'm sorry. The allusions to changing the locks, leaving their things on the front porch and possibly a note explaining why the kid was being kicked out all smacked of an ultra-quick, unexpected haul out the door.

[LeavingMassachusetts]

Both of my sons knew early on that if they didn't go to college full time that after they graduated high school, they became my roommate and would have to pay their share. This also included me living where I wanted to live, not where they wanted to live. Once you become an adult, it is time to be responsible and the free ride ends. They have never moved back home after they left for school, but they know they always have a home with Mom if they need it. Without a special circumstance though, it sure wouldn't be for free.

How long are kids supposed to live at home for free once they are adults?

[paganmama80]

Originally Posted by LeavingMassachusetts

Both of my sons knew early on that if they didn't go to college full time that after they graduated high school, they became my roommate and would have to pay their share. This also included me living where I wanted to live, not where they wanted to live. Once you become an adult, it is time to be responsible and the free ride ends. They have never moved back home after they left for school, but they know they always have a home with Mom if they need it. Without a special circumstance though, it sure wouldn't be for free.

How long are kids supposed to live at home for free once they are adults?

We were allowed to until we graduated and got on our feet. You'll find the early age we leave at home is a very American thing.

[rory00]

i think kids that come from good homes that are so unruly or bad that parents think of kicking them out are terrible.

why? because there are kids who are kicked out or want to leave (sometimes can't) because the predators and abusers are right in their family. if it's the former case, maybe some shock and realism therapy would help them realize the blessing they have. take them to jails or see the homeless etc and talk to them about the dangers out there.

it's amazing that my abusers held onto me when i needed to get away (just to take their angst or project their issues which is a debased and strange motivation to hold onto someone) from them but wouldn't help me genuinely when i needed it or in a way that would honestly help me gain strength. they constantly kept me weak in some way. there are some really sick and twisted people out there and so deceptive, though they appear and act like everyone else or keep it cleverly hidden knowing how to act and at what times.

there is really no way to tell what is truly going on in most domestic situations as appearances or how people present them can be really untrue.

[Magritte25]

Originally Posted by LeavingMassachusetts

Both of my sons knew early on that if they didn't go to college full time that after they graduated high school, they became my roommate and would have to pay their share. This also included me living where I wanted to live, not where they wanted to live. Once you become an adult, it is time to be responsible and the free ride ends. They have never moved back home after they left for school, but they know they always have a home with Mom if they need it. Without a special circumstance though, it sure wouldn't be for free.

How long are kids supposed to live at home for free once they are adults?

Until they finish college (or another post secondary training of some sort), get a professional job and save up a little nest egg. At least in my home.

[LeavingMassachusetts]

Originally Posted by Magritte25

Until they finish college (or another post secondary training of some sort), get a professional job and save up a little nest egg. At least in my home.

You'll note I said if they didn't go to college full time.