Parenting in a recession - will kids hear "no" more? (teaching, average)

[lastinshow]

Was just thinking about the feeling in the air now - that recession looms and it is time to buckle down.

I think that it will mean cutting away the frippery, and kids hearing the word "no" a lot more as wants go to the side as people deal more with needs.

I can't help but feel that it would be a good thing for kids to be a lot less spoiled (I include my own in that list, although they have a lot less than their peers). I see a sense of entitlement all around, which our children have absorbed. Paring down might be a good lesson.

And no I am not forgetting those really in trouble - I donate time and money to charities that deal with the homeless and working poor, especially those with kids. So no flames please.
Just talking about a change in societies attitudes.

Thoughts? Am I the only one seeing this?

[vergla]

we have always put our needs first .so both of our daughtlers are use to it we will once in awhile get something they want .we live in a state that is cold and lots of snow so soon we will buying their long sleave shirts and sweeters to keep them warm during winter. but things like toys we usually get that when its christmas or their birthdays they dont take care of their toys so that why we do it that way.

[TouchOfWhimsy]

For my family personally, we are pretty frugal, so I doubt that my kids will notice any cutbacks unless they become very extreme. They get told "no" quite a bit when it comes to new toys and expensive things that they want to do, but we are well practiced at substituting less costly but just as good, or even better, experiences.

Honestly, I wonder how ADULTS are going to do during this time. We (adults in general) are so used to luxuries that many in the world will never even comprehend. It's one thing to cut out your daily frappachino or decide to not go skiing this winter in the name of saving money, but quite another to turn your thermostat way down to save on heating costs, or to cut out buying all convenience foods, sell that second car, etc... things that we in general don't typically consider luxuries, even though they are, if that makes any sense.

[Jess11]

I agree it will be the adults that will be impacted more by the tough economic times. Since irresponsible adult spending/loaning/crediting has created this situation. Also I would think that most parents will probably go without so children do not have to as much.
I think everyone (myself included) will have to really evaluate our needs vs. our wants and prioritize spending. Especially in the upcoming holiday season.

[cdc3217]

I think the underlyng question here is - as America enters a recession, will the average family finally stop overspending/borrowing? On the one hand, there is a finally a message entering our lives saying, don't overdo it - don't overextend, whereas before this was virtually nonexistent in the public sphere. On the other hand, part of economic recovery relies on consumers continuing to spend.

So I don't know the answer to that - I think we have to wait and see how this whole mess unfolds, and if Americans do start to downsize, then the answer is yes. But that will take a huge cultural shift. Snd it will be interesting to see how organized religion factors intoa cultural shift.

[EJRuek]

Ah...everything made sense in this thread until I got down to the "see how organized religion factors into a cultural shift" part. cdc3217, could you clarify?

[fierce_flawless]

My kids won't hear "no" anymore than usual. They already know what the deal is and they don't ask for stuff because they know there's not a lot extra. So, my 16 year old decided to get a job, for his 'extras'. I am glad, actually. I was raised without a lot of extras, I got a job when I was a teen, and I truly appreciated "stuff" because I understood what it meant to work for it.

[cdc3217]

Originally Posted by EJRuek

Ah...everything made sense in this thread until I got down to the "see how organized religion factors into a cultural shift" part. cdc3217, could you clarify?

I was just trying to give credence to the fact that lots of religious websites have promoted simpler living for a long time, and I was wondering if there would be more middle of the road folks jumping on their bandwagon. It would be interesting to me if we elect a democrat for his economic message (wich is really simplistic so forgive me Barack!) but the underlying message of tightening the purse strings came from a more religious conservative base. Make any sense? Or am I blowing hot air?

[EJRuek]

Well, I'm one of those far left and far righters that used to be called a Constitutionalist before that moniker became somehow synonymous with Hitler-type mentalities. A born flag-waver, raised Dutch Reform, I'm a tree-hugger, pro-preservation, pro-environmental conservation, believe in choice, believe in the death penalty, believe in the right to keep and bear arms, and believe in the separation of church and state IMPLICITLY and EXPLICITLY, believe everyone has the right to believe as their conscience dictates, though their actions must be tempered to not interfere with another's right to the same freedoms and to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. In other words, religion should do not harm.

That said, no I don't think that conservative Christians preach more frugality than anyone else who has a frugal bent. Our family "flunks consumerism," and, quite frankly, we're labelled as "liberals," though the liberals consider us "conservatives." (*scratches head*)

Here's our monthly bills: Electricity/natural gas, water/sewer, telephone/Internet, cell phone, fee for web presence, food, pet food, insurance, Netflix (two per week).

Here's what we do:
* We eat well, but we cook at home, and I don't mean out of a box, either.
* We keep a "victory garden." We can and freeze the harvest.
* We do not have a television -- banned that a long time ago, thank you, when all I was seeing was children and adults being brainwashed into consumerism and spend, spend, spend.
* We have one car (a thirteen year old car with 73k original miles) and one truck (150k original miles), both paid for, both kept in excellent repair always,
* we have one bike apiece and use them
* we have one computer and one modest cell phone apiece

What can go? The web presence, the cell phones, Netflix.

This is how we live. We're doers, not buyers. We don't drink, go to bars and lounges, don't cavort with druggies, don't change the drapes at a whim, don't buy new furniture, only buy a new appliance if the old one breaks, we take care of our clothing, use the sewing machine to patch what needs patching, and only buy when something wears out. Of course, WHEN we buy, we buy the best: carharts, White's boots, so on, but, since it isn't that often and the clothes and shoes last and last, it's a good purchase in my opinion.

In other words, I don't think conservative Christians have a corner on the frugal philosophy, at all, especially the way they solicit money from the elderly via televangelism. Buddhists, in fact, have a much more frugal message.

Does this have something to do with the original post? I think so. I think that kids who grow up working side by side with their parents learn frugal values. I think church has little to do with teaching kids to be frugal, much less their parents. I think, instead, that greed in America, especially as exhibited by youth, leads to boredom and overindulgence (immoderate behavior), which then takes kids into problem behavior where they think that fun is their right and that they just have to have that cool new pair of Nikes or jeans or just have to go to the ultra lounge their friends are going to...

Okay. Sorry. Got up on my high horse there. Reining down now.

[cdc3217]

EJ -
Well that's good to know!
Didn't mean to imply religious conservatives cornered the market on this by any means....
Just seem to be crossing a lot of examples of this lately.