Breastfeeding Older Children (welfare, behavior, sleep, home)

[Taboo2]

Originally Posted by miasmommy

I was responding to someone who said that breastfeeding should NOT be allowed in public. I quoted the wrong person.

My comments and views were only exaggerated in my previous post based on that ONE person's comments! It made me sick and I jumped. Sorry

I can understand someone not nursing because of medical issues. I cannot understand nor will I tolerate people who think the "better" more "natural" choice should NOT be allowed.

It would NEVER happen by the way.

And what I meant by the sticker comment was that if someone is so uncomforable with their daughters/children seeing a person give nutrition "naturally" to their own child, what are they telling them in the tub when they can see their own bodies?

If we are to ban breastfeeding in public, why not ban low cut shirts on girls and women? I would rather my children and yours learn that breasts are for offspring to get their food from rather than to show off in a tank top!

I think breast feeding should be just totally allowed in public as long as you are not shaking 'em for the world to see. And quite frankly that won't be a problem since most women breastfeeding are quite full of milk and not in the mood for a show.

I think there should be discretion when you do it, just like changing a diaper. I don't show the world my kids toosh but sometimes it has to be done in public.

[miasmommy]

Originally Posted by Taboo2

I think breast feeding should be just totally allowed in public as long as you are not shaking 'em for the world to see. And quite frankly that won't be a problem since most women breastfeeding are quite full of milk and not in the mood for a show.

I think there should be discretion when you do it, just like changing a diaper. I don't show the world my kids toosh but sometimes it has to be done in public.

I completely agree. Most women are getting in and getting the job done. The part that is "uncomfortable" for some to see, is in the babies mouth anyway.

That is a good point about the bottom

[nrfitchett4]

Originally Posted by miasmommy

I don't think bottle feeding should be allowed in public! I can understand that some (very few) women cannot nurse due to medical issues. They should have an exempt card or something. Bottle feeding is unatural and does not have ALL of the benifits as breastfeeding. I look down on people who bottle feed just because they feel it is easier or find nursing "uncomfortable." I had infections and pain the first month of breastfeeding. My daughter had trouble latching on. I had FREE help from the hospital and I kept at it. I faught through the pain to give my DAUGHTER the best nutritional food there is! If you are uncomfortable with me nursing in public, maybe you should put stickers over your own daughters when they take baths??????????????

so asking a woman to cover up in public is asking too much when out with my children? So any woman should be allowed to walk around topless then. It is the same thing. Breasts in America are considered a private area on women.
But I guess since dogs breastfeed where ever and they are mammals, we should too. Maybe since dogs screw anywhere too, we should just do it whenever we get the urge.
Makes total sense.

[nrfitchett4]

Originally Posted by zonababe

Ok I'll bite, what would the stickers say?

don't expect much of a response. She also thinks that the taxpayers should pay for her kid's healthcare because her and her husband couldn't exercise responsibility of paying for it themselves.

[nrfitchett4]

Originally Posted by ADVentive

I think that your opinion is common among those who have not had kids or whose kids have not been breastfed. You don't realize the logistics of what you are suggesting, nor how offensive it is to nursing moms. You think that the nursing mom is the one who doesn't have respect for you, while she feels that it is you who doesn't have respect for her.

I admit that I pretty much felt the same way until I had a breastfed infant and wanted to get out of the house, and realized that there was no way to do this without nursing in public because my baby needed to eat frequently. Many places do have nursing rooms, and I have used these when I was out by myself. But when I was out with my husband, or with friends, I didn't think it was fair to me or to my companions for me to go off and sit by myself in a room for 30 minutes while they waited. I imagine that this will be even less feasible for me this time around with a 3 year old to occupy too. I am not going to expect her to sit in a nursing room every time I need to feed her sister. Not only that, but many places don't offer such rooms. I remember going to a restaurant with my daughter when she was maybe 3-4 weeks old. She needed to nurse and I didn't know what to do. They didn't even have a chair in the ladies room that I could use, and I wasn't going to sit on the toilet! I ended up nursing her at the table because I didn't even have any other options, and this was at a time when I would have liked to use a nursing room because I was still an uncomfortable new mom who felt very exposed.

As for using a bottle when out in public, there are several problems with that sentiment. One is that logistically, this is difficult. One has to plan ahead far enough to pump enough milk for the outing and predict properly how much is needed. Pumped milk is difficult to come by, so you don't want to waste it, but you also wouldn't want to run out. One has to then have a way of keeping the milk cold until it is needed, and then a way to warm it up when baby wants it. One of the great conveniences of nursing is that the milk is always there and ready with no need to prepare it. Then there is the issue of mom's own comfort because her breasts are now full because baby hasn't nursed. This can also cause her milk supply to go down because her breasts haven't been emptied though the baby has fed, and because a pump is less efficient at emptying the breast than a baby. For a mother who is working out of the home and pumping for daycare, it's even more difficult because that pumped milk in the refrigerator is needed for daycare and it is a waste to use it when mom is around. It is also necessary for such a mom to nurse directly when together with baby to keep up her supply because she is already replacing several feeds with pumping. Another issue is that not all babies will even take a bottle, even if mom wants her to! My daughter, for example, never took a bottle, even at daycare, so even if I wanted to bottle feed her when out in public, that just was never an option for me (I had to go to daycare to nurse her on my break). There is also the issue of the message it sends to moms, babies, and society in general, to say that nursing should be hidden. It implies that something is wrong with nursing, that it is dirty or shameful in some way. And we wonder why breastfeeding rates and durations are so low.

You saying to me, "you should just pump and bottle feed" is possibly as offensive to me as if I said to you "your wife should just breastfeed." Let's just mind our own business.

so it's not possible to cover up with a receiving blanket? I don't personally have a problem with breastfeeding, just think that it could be covered up out of respect for other people. I consider it lude for children to see women's breasts, especially if they are not immediate family. Maybe I'm in the minority here. I don't think it should be illegal, just done discretely.

[TouchOfWhimsy]

I always nursed discreetly without a receiving blanket. What baby wants a blanket on their head, especially during a Florida summer? Honestly, if you pull your shirt up, the baby's body covers your midsection, and their head covers your breast, with your nipple and areola in the baby's mouth. It is possible that someone might catch a glimpse of the fraction of an inch of skin above the areola, if your shirt is not resting on the baby's lip. Besides that, usually a woman feeding a baby either has the baby in a sling (and the sling covers most of what's out of the shirt) or else sitting down... why would you be looking that closely at a woman sitting on a bench at the mall cuddling and nursing her baby if you were offended at seeing a tiny strip of breast skin? You certainly see more breast tissue if a woman wears low cut top or even a regular bathing suit.

I nursed my daughter for a long time and probably 90% of my friends also nursed. I've seen just about every one of my friends nurse their babies, most of them dozens of times. I've seen the areolas of exactly one of my friends, and it was a time that she was nursing at my house, so was not being extra careful not to expose herself, and the baby pulled off suddenly at the time that I happened to be looking at her and talking to her. I've never seen the "embarrassing parts" of any woman who was nursing in public. I've seen lots of breast tissue that I would rather not see in women wearing bikinis or pushup bras and low cut tops. Somehow I doubt that you feel that those types of displays are lewd and inappropriate for children to see, though.

[miasmommy]

Originally Posted by nrfitchett4

don't expect much of a response. She also thinks that the taxpayers should pay for her kid's healthcare because her and her husband couldn't exercise responsibility of paying for it themselves.

Stalker

[yodi]

Originally Posted by nrfitchett4

so asking a woman to cover up in public is asking too much when out with my children? So any woman should be allowed to walk around topless then. It is the same thing. Breasts in America are considered a private area on women.

As a first time Mom of a newborn it was hard nursing a baby under a cover because I was still getting the hang of breastfeeding and needed to see what I was doing. A lot of babies won't nurse under a blanket and they will pull the blanket off. I'm grateful for the opportunity to have my child see other women out in public nursing their babies. It provides me with an opportunity to talk with them about how babies eat. Comparing women walking around topless to breastfeeding is offensive, as is the rest of your post.

[cr1039]

For me, it is not so much seeing nipple or breast but the act makes me uncomfortable.

Seeing someone I do not know breast feed her infant and not "covering up" appropriately, in a situation where it is unexpected (not at a baby shower say) makes me uncomfortable.

In addition, I think that there are others who are uncomfy with this too. That does not mean that breastfeeding is wrong by any means, but just makes people uncomfy.

Being a young woman who has not had a lot of experience around very young infants, I cannot say if expecting a woman to cover up is proper or not - but I have seen women take their breast out like pulling a potato out of a sack, hold it to their baby's mouth and all the while mid section is showing, bra pulled to the side - it is just such a vulnerable position to see a stranger in.

All I would hope for it that women display a bit of tact. Nobody at the restaurant, lobby, plane, etc. has to know that you are feeding...just embracing your baby close...

[dvcgal]

The problem with breastfeeding is not so much the natural act, but what breasts have come to mean in our society. If we had been raised to know that breast were functioning means of nutrients rather than s$x objects, then maybe society could handle seeing a breast a time or two. But thanks to jerks like the guy who came up with Girls Gone Wild who shamelessly promotes where babies feed from, it has taken something so natural to a sexual tone. Our society is on a non-functioning level when it comes to sex. We talk about it the least, we show the least amount of it possible and then people wonder why grown mature adults cannot see a breast in public. I honestly feel bad for those that want to breastfeed out in public but choose not to due to the immaturity of our society. Women should be allowed to do what is natural for them, but this also means that women have to STOP using their breast as sex objects!