One more reason NOT to put my kids in daycare (ideas, baby)

[LIOC]

Originally Posted by miasmommy

Again: One more reason not to put MY kids in daycare!

If I can protect my child from something that has a very small chance of happening, then I want to try to do so! Especially if they are not missing out on some great life experience by doing so. I can involve my children in playdates to socialize rather than drop them off all day at daycare where I can't see what is going on. I'm not going to fly in airplanes everyday just for fun but if it involves visiting family we haven't seen in a long while it serves more of a purpose and is worth the risk. And as for someone's example of a random stranger coming to a park and shooting a bunch of people, yes, I'd probably find a new park in hopes it would not happen at that one. How do you know it is random by the way????

If you have to work, want to work and have no one to watch your children and you HAVE to send them to daycare, so be it. I respect that. There are many reasons I don't want to send my children off to be "parented" by other people all day and this is just ONE small part.

AGAIN AGAIN: ONE more reason not to send MY kids to daycare.

I think you are missing the point. No one here is saying daycare is right for your family. They are disagreeing with you argument that this news story does and/or should hold any weight in the decision.

Your argument is a fallacy. You stated above you would find another park to attend if you current part became a dangerous to your child and not just give up parks altogether. This means that this killing has nothing to do with your choice not to send you kids to daycare. You are using a rare occurrence, that is a far from normal happening, to try to bolster your predetermined belief.

Also you should not judge others so much. Just because you believe they are not “parenting” does not make it so. You do not need to disparage others choices to make yours look better.

[miasmommy]

Originally Posted by LIOC

I think you are missing the point. No one here is saying daycare is right for your family. They are disagreeing with you argument that this news story does and/or should hold any weight in the decision.

Your argument is a fallacy. You stated above you would find another park to attend if you current part became a dangerous to your child and not just give up parks altogether. This means that this killing has nothing to do with your choice not to send you kids to daycare. You are using a rare occurrence, that is a far from normal happening, to try to bolster your predetermined belief.

Also you should not judge others so much. Just because you believe they are not “parenting” does not make it so. You do not need to disparage others choices to make yours look better.

A park is different. I am there with her. I am not dropping her off with other adults to play!

And YES when people leave their kids at daycare they are allowing those workers to "parent" their child. That is fine. I choose to parent my child myself along with my husband, family and close friends. I do not think that those that send their kids to daycare are NOT parenting, rather deciding to share that responsibility with others (as I do but not with daycare workers).

I'm very particular with my child and with my own experience working at a daycare, I am not comfortable that they would meet my high standards.

I would expect some to argue that this incident should NOT weigh on my decision against daycare. Everyone disagrees. But the way that I look at it, how could it not?????

I know that MOST daycares probably don't have workers that would throw my child to the ground causing her brain to bleed resulting in her death. But I don't have to take that chance! And the fact that she is NOT missing out on anything at the daycare (since we have multiple playdates and I am teaching her the same things that are taught in a daycare) definitely makes me feel even more at ease with my decision.

[ZugZub]

Originally Posted by miasmommy

Again: One more reason not to put MY kids in daycare!


AGAIN AGAIN: ONE more reason not to send MY kids to daycare.

Fine and dandy if you can afford to stay home. However, you sound like you're an obsessively overprotective helicopter parent. That's not necessarily good for your kid...

[miasmommy]

Originally Posted by ZugZub

Fine and dandy if you can afford to stay home. However, you sound like you're an obsessively overprotective helicopter parent. That's not necessarily good for your kid...

It's the opposite! Can't afford to work! Not only would it cost to pay for daycare I WANT TO BE WITH MY CHILDREN AS A MOTHER!!!!!!!!! It's a personal choice for me and my family. My husband and I don't want a phonecall or "daily review" informing us that our baby took her first step or that she said her first word! The list goes on and on and on........

Not overprotective either. Overprotective because I want I don't want to leave my BABY/YOUNG CHILD with people that are not family or close friends???

When she is older it will be different! Until then, playdates and mommy are what MY baby needs.

[Granny Sue]

So you parent like millions of others parents and unlike millions of parents.

Goody.

Now if you would have posted this story and said, "how sad" you probably wouldn't have gotten the whole daycare vs STHM debate going again.

Kinda makes me wonder.

[miasmommy]

Originally Posted by Kali's Grandma

So you parent like millions of others parents and unlike millions of parents.

Goody.

Now if you would have posted this story and said, "how sad" you probably wouldn't have gotten the whole daycare vs STHM debate going again.

Kinda makes me wonder.

The way it works around here it would have been a debate anyhow

[LIOC]

Originally Posted by miasmommy

A park is different. I am there with her. I am not dropping her off with other adults to play!

And YES when people leave their kids at daycare they are allowing those workers to "parent" their child. That is fine. I choose to parent my child myself along with my husband, family and close friends. I do not think that those that send their kids to daycare are NOT parenting, rather deciding to share that responsibility with others (as I do but not with daycare workers).

I'm very particular with my child and with my own experience working at a daycare, I am not comfortable that they would meet my high standards.

I would expect some to argue that this incident should NOT weigh on my decision against daycare. Everyone disagrees. But the way that I look at it, how could it not?????

I know that MOST daycares probably don't have workers that would throw my child to the ground causing her brain to bleed resulting in her death. But I don't have to take that chance! And the fact that she is NOT missing out on anything at the daycare (since we have multiple playdates and I am teaching her the same things that are taught in a daycare) definitely makes me feel even more at ease with my decision.

You are still going down and illogical thought process. You do many things with you child that are a greater risk of cause then harm. The example many like to use is driving with them in a car. The chances of them dieing in a car accident are substantially higher then the event that happen in your news story, yet you still drive. And as for you "being there", what difference does it make if your child is hurt? Do you own a pool, or go to house that does. More children died that way as well. The chances of your house burning down are greater as well. Do you not live in a house? There are all sorts of risks and the one in the news article is a very small one.

To base your decision on patenting style is one thing. To base it on an isolated incident is another. The "park" is not different. You just have a different view on the nature of parks in the first place that would not allow an one time event to change it. As you know there are many park that are dangerous in this country. You do not let this fact stop you from going to parks you approve of. Just like I am sure parents with child in the program that the child died in are having many kids withdrawn, people to go to a different program, just like you would change parks.

And you are still defending your choice not to send you child to daycare like someone is attacking it. Can you show one post where someone said it was bad for you not to send your child to daycare? you seem to have a chip on your shoulder because no one said anything about her "missing out" but you.

And just because a person places their child in daycare does not mean they are raising your child. But that is another argument.

[hypocore]

And for every story put out there about a child care injury/death, you can find one to match where a parent or other family member did the same type things.

Teen uncle of a child is currently in jail for giving his toddler nephew pot to smoke.
Mother of two young children is in jail for drowning them.
Dad left child in hot car while working...child died.
Brother in jail for shooting sibling with gun found in house.

All the families above trusted their family members, and now have and injured or dead child.

Using your statements for comparison...guess I can't trust my family or myself with my children.

I've been in the child care profession going on 20 years and have never, ever had/seen a child injured at the hands of any child care provider whether in a center for 11+ of those years, or with myself for the last 8+.

Perhaps it would be best to simply say you'd rather do it all yourself when it comes to your child and leave it at that.......

[121804]

Originally Posted by miasmommy

I've had a lump in my throat since I read this in my paper this morning. I will NOT be putting my children into daycare for many reasons, this being one of them.

This should have NEVER happened. This girl is going to have to deal with the fact that she killed an innocent little kid for the rest of her life.

Day care aide held in murder of boy :: CHICAGO SUN-TIMES :: Chicago Crime

Never say never...

I know 1 mom who works & sends her child to daycare by CHOICE. 1. Other than that, every one else..pure financial need that most times is based on things I have no clue about b/c IT"S NOT my life nor my business.

So quick to throw the first stone...

Until you've been there...you really have no clue.

I've been on both sides. I love it when SAHMs who've never had to put their children in daycare give their list of 5,000 reasons as if NO ONE else has every thought that way & that how everything they are doing is the very best with no little flaw and aren't they just so the perfect mommy...want a sticker for how great you are about setting up playdates? That's not hard. Nor is sitting with your child & reading to them. Putting them in daycare & leaving them with others is hard. Going to work 7-6 & picking up your child & going home and making time for them & doing housework & making dinner within a matter of an hour is hard. Sitting around all day with your one child & playing with them...not hard.

Clap clap for you! Now, figure out how to make YOUR life work for EVERYONE elses! Then post that, okay?

The article is one thing. Your judgment is another. The article is NOT a reason parents send their children to daycare & actually, why moms many times are so worn out due to all the worries & anxities that go into having your child in daycare.. And I can said that b/c I've HAD to do it. And for you?

And there is nothing new about the article other than another SAHM poster who wants to declare how her decisions are the only ones that matter.

[miasmommy]

Originally Posted by LIOC

You are still going down and illogical thought process. You do many things with you child that are a greater risk of cause then harm. The example many like to use is driving with them in a car. The chances of them dieing in a car accident are substantially higher then the event that happen in your news story, yet you still drive. And as for you "being there", what difference does it make if your child is hurt? Do you own a pool, or go to house that does. More children died that way as well. The chances of your house burning down are greater as well. Do you not live in a house? There are all sorts of risks and the one in the news article is a very small one.

To base your decision on patenting style is one thing. To base it on an isolated incident is another. The "park" is not different. You just have a different view on the nature of parks in the first place that would not allow an one time event to change it. As you know there are many park that are dangerous in this country. You do not let this fact stop you from going to parks you approve of. Just like I am sure parents with child in the program that the child died in are having many kids withdrawn, people to go to a different program, just like you would change parks.

And you are still defending your choice not to send you child to daycare like someone is attacking it. Can you show one post where someone said it was bad for you not to send your child to daycare? you seem to have a chip on your shoulder because no one said anything about her "missing out" but you.

And just because a person places their child in daycare does not mean they are raising your child. But that is another argument.

I have to drive a car. I have to live in a house. By the way, I only take my daughter in the car when absolutely necessary! For our family it isn't necessary to take my kid to daycare. Just like I'm sure that most parents take their kids to daycare only when absolutely necessary.

I was in the "business" too for years and saw workers not following through on parents wishes. I also saw SAHM dropping their kids off for 9 hours a day 5 days a week!

No chip. Just once again MY beliefs have been challanged and questioned. And that is fine, this IS a forum and is to be expected I guess. But that wasn't MY intent when I posted. I only posted a horrible story about a murdered child which only added to my extensive list of reasons why I would NEVER send MY kids to daycare. I'll be sure to only post threads the way you want me to from now on.