As a parent, would you really be ok if your child is apart of an interracial relationship??? (grandfather, homemade) - Children, problems, school, daycare, behavior, age, teenagers, infants - Page 12 - City-Data Forum

Omaha Rocks · 05-12-2009, 08:10 AM

My sons is marrying a full-blooded Norwegian from Wisconsin. Should I be concerned?

nat_at772 · 05-12-2009, 08:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by quelinda

Do you smart mouthed.

I don't understand that question or comment.

Quote:

Originally Posted by quelinda

Maybe you would take it personally or something that your son chose the dreaded white woman? I'm sure you wouldn't admit to that at any rate.

i already said I would be uinhappy so if that's not admitting it I don't know what it is.

Quote:

Originally Posted by quelinda

Its not nice to be liked but have that one strike against you that really has nothing to do with who you are and just all about your skin tone and ethnic background.

I did not say I wouldn't like her - I said I'd be polite to her and if she loved my son and he loved her then I'd be fine with it. But I'd be unhappy - parents are sometimes unhappy doesn't mean I won't support my son.

Quote:

Originally Posted by quelinda

That happened to me once, with this guy who obviously didn't want to be a sell out when it comes to marriage though dating a white woman wasn't much of a problem obviously.

Don't really care about your personal experience. I answered the question honestly; if I had known it was just a setup for people to come out an accuse me of being racist than I wouldn't have bothered.

Overall, the reason I would be unhappy has nothing to do with my dislike for women of other races but my love of black women and I'm not going to apologize for that.

LML · 05-12-2009, 08:32 AM

To me this question belongs in the 1950s. I didn't think that it was even considered such a big deal anymore.

Omaha Rocks · 05-12-2009, 08:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LML

To me this question belongs in the 1950s. I didn't think that it was even considered such a big deal anymore.

Well... to be fair, this is probably a REALLY big deal in a lot of more rural areas. And I'm not sure it's so much about racism & bigotry as it is about unfamiliarity and fear.

quelinda · 05-12-2009, 08:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by natalayjones

I don't understand that question or comment.

I was just using the phrase "you do you". Meaning do what makes you happy. I just added Smart Mouthed since you described yourself that way. No one said you should care about my personal experiences, do you like I said. Guess white folks aren't the only racists in their love for their own kind..

quelinda · 05-12-2009, 08:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LML

To me this question belongs in the 1950s. I didn't think that it was even considered such a big deal anymore.

Actually I recall the 1980's being an extremely openly racist time period as well. Things started to die down a bit in the 1990's, but if you ask a black person or latino (or pick your non-white ethnicity) you might find a different viewpoint about racism being all dead et al.

nat_at772 · 05-12-2009, 09:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by quelinda

Guess white folks aren't the only racists in their love for their own kind..

Oh no she called me a racist

I'm so hurt

how will I ever face the world. You don't even know me. I come from a very blended family; my paternal grandmother was Asian. I have cousins who are white, black, Hispanic, Haitian, etc. My nephews are mixed. I love all of my family. But I was very close to my grandmother and am very close to my mother and I would love it if my son brought home a woman who resembled them in some ways; my boyfriend has some of the qualities that my grandfather possessed.

I have said that at the end of the day I would support my son no matter but hey if it makes you feel better to call me a racist or bigot then go right ahead.

LML · 05-12-2009, 09:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by quelinda

Actually I recall the 1980's being an extremely openly racist time period as well. Things started to die down a bit in the 1990's, but if you ask a black person or latino (or pick your non-white ethnicity) you might find a different viewpoint about racism being all dead et al.

Oh I don't kid myself that racism is all dead. There are always a group of haters that must find someone to hate. And I'm sure there are still a group of parents (of all ethnicities) who only want their children to marry someone of the same ethnic group. It is just that ...other than on the CD boards... I just don't hear a big deal being made about race anymore. My own family looks like the United Nations with people of literally every race as part of it. The kids I taught before retiring came from every race and mixture of races you could imagine. I guess it all depends on where you live.

nat_at772 · 05-12-2009, 09:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LML

Oh I don't kid myself that racism is all dead. There are always a group of haters that must find someone to hate. And I'm sure there are still a group of parents (of all ethnicities) who only want their children to marry someone of the same ethnic group. It is just that ...other than on the CD boards... I just don't hear a big deal being made about race anymore. My own family looks like the United Nations with people of literally every race as part of it. The kids I taught before retiring came from every race and mixture of races you could imagine. I guess it all depends on where you live.

Yeah I don't think racism is dead but I've never actually encountered any racist behavior - if I have it wasn't upfront and in my face like what my parents may have encountered. My best friend married an Italian woman and as far as I know they've never really had anyone be rude to them about it; I give her a hard time every once in awhile because those kids hair always looks a mess.

I don't think this particular topic has anything to do with hate - at least that's not the way I interpreted it. i would be a little unhappy if my son brought a boy home - I don't hate homosexuals. I'd be a little unhappy if he brought home a woman 15 years older than him - I don't hate older people. No matter who he brings home I'm not going to love my son any less and I won't mistreat the person he brings home.

Omaha Rocks · 05-12-2009, 10:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by natalayjones

Yeah I don't think racism is dead but I've never actually encountered any racist behavior - if I have it wasn't upfront and in my face like what my parents may have encountered. My best friend married an Italian woman and as far as I know they've never really had anyone be rude to them about it; I give her a hard time every once in awhile because those kids hair always looks a mess.

I don't think this particular topic has anything to do with hate - at least that's not the way I interpreted it. i would be a little unhappy if my son brought a boy home - I don't hate homosexuals. I'd be a little unhappy if he brought home a woman 15 years older than him - I don't hate older people. No matter who he brings home I'm not going to love my son any less and I won't mistreat the person he brings home.

You've touched on something important.

There really IS an element of simply wanting what is best for your grown child - and knowing that some "partners" might be a very, very difficult fit.

If one of my grown sons brought home a black lady who is 15-18 years their senior, I would have a problem with that. And it wouldn't be because she's black - though I'm sure somebody would eventually scream about me being a racist. It'd be because that kind of an age gap is tough on any marriage.

I know several guys who did short-term mission work in Romania. They both ended up marrying girls from there. I would think that'd be very tough - not because I'm prejudiced against Romanians, but because there are a lot of inherent problems to overcome.