U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 1.5 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Jump to a detailed profile or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Business Search - 14 Million verified businesses
Search for:  near: 
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 03-26-2009, 09:54 PM
 
5,572 posts, read 7,992,474 times
Reputation: 5596
A good person is a good person regardless of where they come from or how much and what type of melanin they have in their skin. This is a ridiculously sad thread - showing once more how we really are not beyond this point as a society, yet. It's shallow, it's cruel, it's a shame, and an incredible waste of time. You simply cannot base an educated personal judgment of someone's character by simply looking at their pigment.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 03-26-2009, 11:29 PM
 
2,465 posts, read 3,008,625 times
Reputation: 1241
I wouldn't care if any of my children dated someone of a different skin color. My oldest daughter is half hispanic, half white.

As long as whomever they date are good to them, and an honest, respectful and responsible person they could be green with purple polka dots for all I care.

I am with the poster who said they would be more concerned about them dating someone of a very different religion or non religion in that is a whole nother ball of wax. Especially if that religion sees women as nothing more than objects. I don't want my daughters being treated as such and I wouldn't want my son treating a women that way either.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-27-2009, 06:22 AM
 
757 posts, read 1,384,163 times
Reputation: 596
Yes, I would really be ok!

This question is absolutely absurd.

OP, do you get out much? Look around it's 2009.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-27-2009, 07:40 AM
 
Location: Land of Thought and Flow
7,691 posts, read 8,940,143 times
Reputation: 4401
Quote:
Originally Posted by casshern View Post
All honesty right now, if you had a daughter who is 16, and your 16 year old daughter brings a black man, who is the same complexion as Wesley Snipes, how would you really react as a parent? Instead of giving the politically correct answer, just think about how you would react at that moment.
Well, the initial "meet the boyfriend" scenario would be a planned event. Before he is to enter the household, I will have my guns out for cleaning and my knives out for sharpening. Depending upon his demeanor and character is how the conversation and reaction will go from there. In fact, this would go for any boyfriend (or girlfriend) that is brought home.

When it comes to relationships:
Skin color means nothing to me. How you carry yourself means everything.
In fact, that also goes for religion, gender, etc.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-27-2009, 07:54 AM
 
Location: Penobscot Bay, the best place in Maine!
1,841 posts, read 3,673,872 times
Reputation: 2388
Quote:
Originally Posted by casshern View Post
I have been doing research and it appears most parents would not be satisfied. Even though I know most of you say "I am not racist and I would not care at all" and "if they want to do it, it is OK" but seriously? However we are human and we really do not know how we will respond if that situation actually happens to them throughout there lifetime.

All honesty right now, if you had a daughter who is 16, and your 16 year old daughter brings a black man, who is the same complexion as Wesley Snipes, how would you really react as a parent? Instead of giving the politically correct answer, just think about how you would react at that moment.

In some cultures, they would literally disown their daughters them from the spot if a situation like that happens.
What research, exactly, have you been doing? I'm interested in this part of the equation. How many people have you polled, what are the demographics of that group of people, and what percentage said they would be displeased about it? When you say "most parents", I have to assume that your research is broad enough to include a lot of people from varying backgrounds and lifestyles, not just the members of the local chapter of Aryan Nation. Please share your research methods and resulting data.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-27-2009, 08:17 AM
 
Location: In My Own Little World. . .
3,238 posts, read 5,686,197 times
Reputation: 1557
DH and I are both white. My 2 adopted sons are white, my adopted daughter is brown-skinned (Indian). I dated a black man before I met my husband. My son's first gf was interracial, and he didn't seem to even notice enough to mention her father was black when he met him (at the father's insistence before he would let my son date her). My brown skinned daughter is dating a white boy. My white neice is married to a brown skinned Philippino man, and they have an adopted brown skinned little boy from the Marshall Islands and an adopted African American baby girl.

Gee, I guess it wouldn't bother me. LOL

Honestly, I tell my kids to chose a life partner who 1) makes them laugh and 2) has integrity. Everything else will fall into place after that. I don't concern myself about superficial things like skin color.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-27-2009, 08:57 AM
 
Location: Visitation between Wal-Mart & Home Depot
8,310 posts, read 21,044,193 times
Reputation: 6648
Quote:
Originally Posted by casshern View Post
I have been doing research and it appears most parents would not be satisfied. Even though I know most of you say "I am not racist and I would not care at all" and "if they want to do it, it is OK" but seriously? However we are human and we really do not know how we will respond if that situation actually happens to them throughout there lifetime.

All honesty right now, if you had a daughter who is 16, and your 16 year old daughter brings a black man, who is the same complexion as Wesley Snipes, how would you really react as a parent? Instead of giving the politically correct answer, just think about how you would react at that moment.

In some cultures, they would literally disown their daughters them from the spot if a situation like that happens.
For some reason I am reminded of Bernie Mac's quote from Don't be a Menace to South Central While Drinking Your Juice in The Hood.

"...and most of all, I hate that black-ass Wesley Snipes!"

I think that would be a bit of a struggle for me (which isn't saying much since any boy would be a struggle), but I'd get over it if he was a good kid.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-27-2009, 09:04 AM
 
Location: Connecticut
1,461 posts, read 2,789,163 times
Reputation: 1585
Default Would you be ok if child is a part of interracial relationship?

Before my Mom passed away 3 years ago, she and I were talking about this very subject. She was a blue blood from Massachusetts and said that in her "day" it was not a good thing to marry an Italian..folks considered that interracial. It was hard for me to even fathom that as my late husband was 100% Italian and my present husband is half Italian. Guess I would have been frowned upon big time, huh?

If I had a daughter who happened to fall in love with an African American, Asian, American Indian, Puerto Rican or any man of any color at all, as long as he treated her well, provided for her well and loved her more than the air he breathed, I would be ok with it. This answer is coming straight from my heart as my dearest friend of 30 years happens to be African
American and happens to have at least a dozen grandchildren who are all mixed and absolutely beautiful. Color is just that...COLOR and nothing more.

I was married to a white man who was the absolute worst person I have ever encountered in my entire life. He started out ok but turned into a monster when he started doing drugs and drinking. He was verbally and emotionally abusive and at one point tried to convince me I was insane so he could take my son and skip out on the marriage. He had me livinig in squalor in Maine hundreds of miles from my family in a 100 year old house that had water in the basement up over the bottom two steps, a leaking roof, no heat, no hot water, wallpaper peeling..it was a nightmare. He loved to chase women and catch them and any STD that might have as a bonus. Had Wesley Snipes or Will Smith been in the area and offered to take me away...I would have gone.

I think the bonus question here is....do you want your daughter or son to be happy with someone of color who adores them and is a great person or do you want them to be with some jerk of a white guy just because he happens to be white? I know...there are lots of great white guys out there too, I have one. This has to be about what makes your child happiest not what makes you happiest...and as far as what the "neighbors might think of a mixed marriage"...none of their concern.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-27-2009, 10:32 AM
 
Location: Eastern time zone
4,459 posts, read 3,932,918 times
Reputation: 3383
Quote:
Originally Posted by casshern View Post
I have been doing research and it appears most parents would not be satisfied. Even though I know most of you say "I am not racist and I would not care at all" and "if they want to do it, it is OK" but seriously? However we are human and we really do not know how we will respond if that situation actually happens to them throughout there lifetime.

All honesty right now, if you had a daughter who is 16, and your 16 year old daughter brings a black man, who is the same complexion as Wesley Snipes, how would you really react as a parent? Instead of giving the politically correct answer, just think about how you would react at that moment.

In some cultures, they would literally disown their daughters them from the spot if a situation like that happens.


My daughter, at sixteen, better not be bringing MEN home, period, or I'm going to discuss statutory rape laws with both of them.

But in answer to your question, I really don't care. My daughters are half Hispanic, and my grandchild is half-Asian (and ftr, that is an amazingly gorgeous combination, if I say so myself). I figure at this point somebody needs to marry a black/Native American/Palestinian, and we'll have all our bases covered.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-27-2009, 10:36 AM
 
Location: Eastern time zone
4,459 posts, read 3,932,918 times
Reputation: 3383
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains View Post
Black, no, as true love sees no skin color. My problem would be if they were Muslim or atheist - just because when your religion clashes you are in for real trouble in a relationship. And I would not want to see a child of mine in that kind of struggle.
My marriage is interfaith, and I have yet to see "real trouble". If there's mutual respect in a relationship, differences are an interesting addition, not a detriment.
And if the mutual respect doesn't exist, you can be the same race, religion, political affiliation, identical down to hat size-- and it still will be a mess.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $84,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2014, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25 - Top