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Old 04-13-2009, 04:16 PM
 
Location: Texas
14,969 posts, read 14,409,137 times
Reputation: 4567

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Quote:
Originally Posted by TakeAhike View Post
The OP needs legal advice beyond the scope of an internet forum.
I fully agree with that.
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Old 04-13-2009, 04:21 PM
 
2,466 posts, read 4,344,303 times
Reputation: 1306
Quote:
Originally Posted by HeyHolliday! View Post
I cant believe some of you people suggest he goes to prison. That really doesn't work as he will come out probably more violent due to being surrounded by violent criminals and it will screw him in the long run career wise as nobody wants to hire a person with a criminal record. How many people come out of prison straight and normal...

I recognize he is 19 so he can make his own decisions but maybe you should help him get into a sport or something that is violent. Maybe get him into boxing, hockey, rugby, or something where he can take his aggression out on something. I use to go to an alternative high school my senior year and many young adults with anger problems attended there as well. The methods they used was to get these young adults to take their energy out on something like a punching bag and lo and behold once they got tired down they would not act violent. From what I have seen firsthand most people that have anger problems have a lot of built energy that is not being used positively. Plus you also have to take into consideration he is 19 and hormones at that age can always make young men act weird.
Most of us are not suggesting prison. We merely suggested that the OP call the police the next time he has a violent outbreak. Sometimes the best thing that can happen to a person with violent tendancies is to be arrested, got to court and be ordered by the judge to get some sort of help. That help could be anger management, a mental health evaluation and counciling or go to a drug and alcohol rehab.

The fact that the kid is 19 years old, it is most likely he will not listen to the OP if she were to suggest or try and get him some help. But if it is ordered by the court he has to comply or be found in contempt which could hold an even harsher sentance or punishment.
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Old 04-13-2009, 04:24 PM
 
Location: Texas
14,969 posts, read 14,409,137 times
Reputation: 4567
Quote:
Originally Posted by wyoquilter View Post
Most of us are not suggesting prison. We merely suggested that the OP call the police the next time he has a violent outbreak. Sometimes the best thing that can happen to a person with violent tendancies is to be arrested, got to court and be ordered by the judge to get some sort of help. That help could be anger management, a mental health evaluation and counciling or go to a drug and alcohol rehab.

The fact that the kid is 19 years old, it is most likely he will not listen to the OP if she were to suggest or try and get him some help. But if it is ordered by the court he has to comply or be found in contempt which could hold an even harsher sentance or punishment.
Exactly. He'd likely be put on some type of probation and ordered into various programs. And he'd be in jail for a night or two upon his initial arrest....that's it.
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Old 04-13-2009, 09:57 PM
 
Location: Australia
1,492 posts, read 2,790,102 times
Reputation: 1716
Tell him you are not paying the car payments. If he is old enough to have a car then he should be paying.

Yes you love him, does that mean you have to put up with this - No.

He shoud dshow respect.

I think you need to get some support so that when you start to draw the line with him, that you have emotional support to deal with him laying it on you and physical support in case he gets violent with you. It souinds like you need to have to confidence to be in charge. To be the leader.

I would try to talk with his father and see if you can agree on a consistent response.
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Old 04-13-2009, 11:20 PM
 
Location: Land of 10000 Lakes +
5,554 posts, read 6,074,334 times
Reputation: 8562
Is wondering if MarySunshine (the OP) is reading any of this.
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Old 04-13-2009, 11:29 PM
 
515 posts, read 1,184,792 times
Reputation: 340
He needs a spanking.
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Old 04-14-2009, 12:08 AM
 
Location: 602/520
2,441 posts, read 6,195,028 times
Reputation: 1815
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aylalou View Post
Is wondering if MarySunshine (the OP) is reading any of this.
Maybe her son came back and put his foot through her computer.
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Old 04-14-2009, 12:24 AM
 
Location: Michigan
12,715 posts, read 11,780,319 times
Reputation: 4151
Quote:
Originally Posted by cherry251 View Post
He needs a spanking.
He needed a spanking 10+ years ago. Right now a full-on thrashing with a horsewhip seems more apposite.
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Old 04-14-2009, 12:25 AM
 
515 posts, read 1,184,792 times
Reputation: 340
Yep. I was saying that sarcastically.

Although a 19 year old getting a spanking in public would help on the "do this again and i'll humiliate you" front...
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Old 04-14-2009, 07:04 AM
 
8,862 posts, read 15,024,356 times
Reputation: 2280
I wish the OP well, if indeed her scenario is legititmate.

Having read several similar posts where the OP never returned to the thread I am cynical enough to question the validity.

There is very little that can be done and it is sad, very sad for the parent(s), family and the individual.

As a previous poster theorized the problems probably began years ago--perhaps with 'spankings/beatings' or perhaps not. At any rate, in my area there are few mental health resources--and it is difficult to arrange such assistance. Jail/prison is not the answer and further complicates stressful situations.A societal problem of epic dimensions.

Heartbreaking and not a topic to be made light of by anyone.
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